The new DC Costumes

Not that anyone really needs to hear what I think, but several of the new costume designs for the DC icons look like pure sales death for those characters. I'm not so worried about the Batman Robot look because Snyder and Capullo have been SLAUGHTERING it on BATMAN, and I'm more than willing to give them the benefit of the doubt as a result; and the Green Lantern with a hoodie look is terrible, but GL sales have already dropped to their lowest point in a decade or more, so there's not a lot of bottom to find there any longer.

But these two?

Here's the thing: to me, Superman should visually be a character that you would want to run TO, not run FROM.  Whether or not that's his ripped cape on his hands, and not blood, he does absolutely have splatters of blood all over his pants and boots.

I'm OK with the T-shirt look, but it's a signifier, to this reader, of looking back, not forward, which I think is a mistake.  The other real mistake is losing the spit curl in front (which, maybe you're dumb like I was for the longest time, but it, too, was an "S")

But, yeah, the main thing to me is that THIS guy looks angry and horrible, and not some one who is inspiring and heroic.  Grant Morrison once said his most fervent aim was to literally have the DC universe come to life.  I once thought that would be awesome, but I'd be petrified if TODAY's DCU were to do that.

Wonder Woman's costume is kind of more appalling.  I'm perfectly fine with "losing the skin" (though why oh why would they keep the "cheescake" artist on the book, if that's the direction?), but y'know, I think it would be better to not then give her a GIANT SCARLET "V" on her crotch with WHITE ARROWS POINTING TOWARDS IT.

The claws are pretty awful, and the pauldrons are pretty pointless -- the reason one HAS pauldrons is to protect the joints of your plate mail armor -- there are no joints involved here.  I also question those stars, because they look like such an after thought rather than a real design choice.

I just wish the entire costume didn't "read" so dark -- and that's, I think, the impact of replacing the skin with a dark navy blue.  That and, how on earth would would get into boots like that, and/or fight in them?

But, yeah, giant white arrows pointing at the scarlet V of her crotch. Ugh.

-B

Why I Hate The Comics Industry, Part 8756412

SENSATION COMICS #3 is a pretty great comic -- it's the kind of comic you could give to a 10 year old girl, or her 45 year old hipster mother equally.  It is kind of exactly the kind of WW comic that a whole swath of people really really want right now, because empowering but also really really cute.  I can absolutely sell this comic to a LOT of folks. Except for the barrier they put in my way.... Come under the cut and I will explain....

So the first store is totally Empowerment! with WW touring as a rock star, and dealing with piggy men (well, that part was kind of trite, actually) and raising up little girls, and it's cute and cartoony and the art by Marguerite Sauvage looks like this:

Then we get an adorable little romp co-starring Catwoman, and, again, cute and cartoony and inviting to the eye, and something that really pairs well with the previous story, and here's a very sweet page from Amy Mebberson.

Finally, the issue wraps up with the first half (boo!!!!) of Gilbert Hernandez's WW story, and it's everything you might expect, and maybe more, and clearly, these three stories have a certain cartoony aesthetic which really shines in every way you would hope that they do.  Look at Gilbert channel his love of Silver Age, with, a smart look for Wondy....

So, with all of this cartooning majesty on display, all that's left is how you package it for the mass audience, to draw in and attract the read that you want, right?

...

...right?

Well, maybe not so much, because this is the cover that DC went with:

Oh, god, really?  Instead of the intersection of cartoony and cute and empowering and sweet and appealing to women and yeah everything in that wheelhouse, someone made a decision that the best way to wrap a package like this is to show a violent cover of the too-many-lines school, where WW literally has splashes of blood all over her face.

This is the kind of cover pretty much designed to repel the people who would be interested in the insides of the comic, and the people for whom the cover is attractive would be APPALLED by the content on the inside.

This comic will get cancelled pretty soon -- which is a damn shame because this is the kind of content that today's new audience really wants -- and someone somewhere will probably point to it as an example of why sweet, cartoony, empowering material doesn't work.  But they're wrong, this is a failure of positioning and marketing.

We're going to work hard to match the people who want this comic to the comic itself, but make no mistake: it's now an uphill battle because of that cover.

-B

"I've Tasted SHOES With More Flavour." COMICS! Sometimes Despite It Being Summer I Still Sit Here And Write This Rhubarb!

As tradition dictates I read some comics and then wrote about them. However, I feel it incumbent upon me to direct your gaze further down the page where two other people have done some real writing. Don't worry there's none of that below this cut; consistency is key! By Scioli & Barber

Anyway, this...

ALL-NEW DOOP #4 Art by Frederico Santagati & David LaFuente Written by Peter Milligan Coloured by Laura Allred Lettered by VC's Clayton Cowles Cover by Michael & Laura Allred Doop created by Michael Allred & Peter Milligan Marvel Entertainment,$3.99 (2014)

In which Ingmar Bergman is invoked, the man whose name is an anagram of Racial Kite returns, points are avoided, developments delayed and a Free Digital code still isn’t any compensation for charging three dollars and ninety nine cents for a slim pamphlet. I could buy a house for that. A house that looked and acted very much like a coffee anyway.

By LaFuente, Milligan, Cowle and Allred

If I just ripped right into this as it so richly deserves (it’s a mess, and not one of blues, nor of eggs) you’d probably think I had some kind of beef with Peter Milligan. I don’t. Just because I dislike this ungodly and resolutely lifeless muddle doesn’t alter one iota the joy and wonder of all the stuff Peter Milligan, together with various talented artists, has done which I do like. It’s not to be sniffed at either that stuff: Bad Company, Skreemer, Enigma, The Eaters, Shade The Changing Man, Skin, Rogan Josh, Paradax, The Extremist, Vertigo Pop: London, Egypt, X-Force, X-Statix, Animal Man, Face, Girl, The Minx, Human Target, Hellblazer and probably some other bits and bobs here and there. The art is good but it’s by two different people and this together with the fact that last issue a character appeared in a scene they shouldn’t have been in suggests some backstage shenanigans. Pure conjecture there but what remains beyond doubt is this book is refusing to work. If you’re a big hearted soul you could read this as some impish piss take of how vacuous busywork is now the hallmark of the current X-books but for those with normal sized hearts the best way to read this remains not to read it at all. EH!

BATMAN '66 #13 Art by Dean Haspiel Written by Gabe Soria Coloured by Allen Passalaqua Lettered by Wes Abbott Cover by Michael & Laura Allred Batman created by Bob Kane with Bill Finger DC Comics, $2.99 (2014)

All of Gotham sits agog before the cathode ray counterparts of the caped crusaders! But what’s this? Is video villainy afoot? Don’t touch that dial, chums!

By Haspiel, Soria, Passalaqua & Abbott

Hey, Dean Haspiel! I like Dean Haspiel! He draws his figures all chunky and loaded with momentum dspite an oddly flat aspect. I like it and I liked seeing it unfold in service of Gabe Soria's comedic conceit about how in the frothy primary coloured world of Batman ’66 a Batman TV show would be all grim and B&W but still as fundamentally ridiculous as the world in which it was transmitted. Possibly even more ridiculous even. The highlight is obviously the whole “bat-business” schtick which is even better if you use the voice of that “Ya filthy animal” guy from Home Alone for TV Batman. I mean, you are doing The Voices in your head anyway aren’t you? Do people do that? I know I’m reading a good comic when I stop “reading” and realise I’ve started acting it out in my head. Some people might think it’s strange but I certainly have no problem admitting I do that as long as it’s a common enough to pass for normal. If it’s grounds for having my kid taken off me then I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about; get the fuck away from me you bloody lunatic! GOOD!

BATMAN '66 MEETS THE GREEN HORNET #2 Art by Ty Templeton Written by Kevin Smith and Ralph Garman Coloured by Tony Avina Lettered by Wes Abbott Cover by Alex Ross Batman created by Bob Kane with Bill Finger Green Hornet created by George W. Trendle & Fran Striker DC Comics,$2.99 (2014)

In which Batman ’66 meets The Green Hornet and a malevolently mirthful villain is revealed! Actually, technically, Batman ‘66 meets The Green Hornet again since the pair actually met in the first issue but then they get split up and so meet again. If that happens every issue there will certainly be no complaints lodged with the Trading and Standards people as far as this comic is concerned.

This comic showed up because I get and like Batman ’66. However I have little to no interest in Kevin Smith and in fact have actively avoided his doings ever since, over a decade ago now, I realised with the kind of diamond hard clarity I wish I could experience about things of real importance, that I didn’t actually like his movies; I just liked watching Jason Lee being sarcastic. Turns out you can watch Jason Lee be sarcastic in things which have nothing to do with Kevin Smith. The Free Market in action there. I think we can all agree that being able to watch Jason Lee be sarcastic and know Kevin Smith was not involved is worth every bit of inequality such a system fosters. Anyway, the good news is that this comic isn’t as dreadful as I feared. Now I don’t know who Ralph Garman is but he seems to be exerting a steadying influence on Kevin Smith; there’s no scene in which Robin ends up sat in his own shit or any ridiculously long-winded fulminating the humour of which is in inverse proportion to its length. So, Kevin Smith fans beware!

By Templeton, Smith, Garman, Avina & Abbott

I mean it still isn’t much cop but it isn’t much cop in such a low key way it’s hard to say precisely why it isn’t much cop. We just don’t seem to have got very far after two issues and we certainly haven’t laughed very much, or indeed at all, but then we’ve not really resented the experience either. And by “we” I mean me and the unquiet ghost of Dandy Nichols, obviously. This qualified success can’t just be down to Ralph Garman as there are also the calmative effects of Ty Templeton’s art to be reckoned with. And this is despite said art being a bit raggedy, a tad approximate even, in places and generally looking as though he’s loaded up his brush with too much ink. Little matter, because underneath all that there’s still the appealing solidity of his figures, the slight quirk of his line and a definite talent for the delineation of Caesar Romero. And yes, Children of The Now, I realise this brush very likely never existed nor was ever dunked in ink as this is one of those digital books they chuck into print to maximise revenue streams or whatever the expense account big boys chunter over by the white boards. Alex Ross’ covers are fun too. Don’t want Alex Ross sulking in the corner; nice covers, Alex Ross. So, yeah, you can probably tell from the preceding that I wasn’t really engaged by this comic but in tribute to Kevin Smith I did give it an overly verbose, self-indulgent and resolutely charmless review. OKAY!

THE GREEN HORNET (2011) Directed by Michel Gondry Screenplay by Seth Rogen & Evan Goldberg Starring Seth Rogen, Jay Chou, Christoph Waltz, Cameron Diaz and Tom Wilkinson Green Hornet created by George W. Trendle & Fran Striker

My spawn wanted to watch this so we watched it. I swear he has powers beyond mortal ken (also I didn’t mind if I did either). Naturally I had been assured by the world outside my window that it was a big old stinker but since that’s the same world that liked the Nolan Batman films I didn’t listen. Also, The Lone Ranger had been denigrated by all and sundry and my spawn enjoyed that so, yeah, ignoring all warnings we gave The Green Hornet a shot. First of all there was too much f*cking effing and jeffing; if they’d f*cking cut that shit out a lower rating might have resulted and what should have been a f*cking kid’s film may have actually been seen by some f*cking kids. You know, kids other than those whose parents are terrible gatekeepers. Because, yes, I know it was a 12 certificate but, oh alright, I’m just a sh*tty parent and while we can talk all day about the sh*ttiness of my parenting (it’s pretty sh*tty by all accounts) I think we should all just move on to the movie. I could be biased there. So, The Green Hornet; I liked it. More importantly Wallace Kirby Chaykin Ditko Kane (or “Gil” for short) liked it. Although a lot of his fun was looking at me with a “HOO! HOO!” face every time someone swore. Which was pretty f*cking often. He had a good time though; Kato was his favourite because Kato kicked butt like butt kicking should be done. I liked the colours and general design sense of the thing and I thought Gondry was surprisingly good at action; it’s not really his usual stamping ground is it? And yet I always knew what was going on and there was quite a lot going on at times. Seth Rogen plays that “Seth Rogen” character he always plays and I find that amusing but I don’t need to see any more of it for a bit; Jay Chou was funny and charming and got all the best physical stuff; Christoph Waltz was just a joy and, yeah, um, Cameron Diaz unwisely hogs a role that should have gone to some up and coming actress and is just plain embarrassing every time she appears. It's more of a Seth Rogen film than a Green Hornet film but that's OKAY!

THE SHADOW: MIDNIGHT IN MOSCOW #2 Art by Howard Victor Chaykin Written by Howard Victor Chaykin Coloured by Jesus Arbuto Lettered by Ken Bruzenak Cover by Howard Victor Chaykin & Jesus Arbuto The Shadow created by Walter B. Gibson Dynamite,$3.99 (2014)

In which The Shadow continues to prepare for his departure; turning off the gas, cancelling the milk, slaughtering criminals and uttering bleak aphorisms along the way.

By Chaykin, Arbuto & Bruzenak

I think the only person who enjoyed the first issue of this series more than me was Howard Victor CHaykin because here it is again. OKAY!

WONDER WOMAN #33 Art by Cliff Chiang Written by Brian Azzarello Coloured by Matthew Wilson Lettered by Jared K. Fletcher Cover by Cliff Chiang Wonder Woman created by William Moulton Marston DC Comics, $2.99 (2014)

In which all things move towards their end and Diana, the newly anointed God of War, rejects an offer of Love from that guy seemingly made of compacted corned beef while her allies savour the sour taste of loss. (OR: Wonder Woman’s search of the jungles of Paradise Island for a headache remedy proves fruitless as the paracetamol.)

If you scrape past the crap (and we’ll get to that; the crap) that’s accreted around it this run of Wonder Woman has been a pretty interesting if slow moving in the mighty modern manner. It’s been a bit of a go at a Sandman for the iPod generation or maybe a nice try at a Percy Jackson, but for children (insert smiley emoticon to indicate a joke nearly happened). Definitely more of an ensemble piece than usual and thus Wonder Woman has sometimes been lost in her own book. But on the plus side there’s been some clever reinventions of ancient idols without falling into that “Denzel - God of 8-Bit Cartridges” trap most mythic modernisers run right into (see: Neil ”Have You Now Or Have You Ever Been A Scientologist” Gaiman). Unfortunately there’s a lot of nose holding going on even as I enjoy the parts of the book which are actually enjoyable. And let’s be clear here absolutely none of the faults of this book lie in the art (except for a bizarre colouring blip this issue where it’s like someone accidentally pressed the “Edgar Delgado” button or something). The art here and throughout this run has been pretty fantastic. I mean there’s a reason I’m still sticking this book out and it sure as cupcakes ain’t the words. Chiang’s back for this final trot towards the end and most of the art for the book’s run has been from either his hands or Goran Sudzuka’s. It hasn’t been as consistent as one pair of hands but it’s been pretty consistent and while Sudzuka’s been no Chiang he’s been no slouch either. There’s been a Toth-ian emphasis on clarity throughout and the detail light results have hovered near the cartoony end of the illustrative spectrum, but that’s been all to the good; some of the stuff they’ve been called on to draw would have been pretty repellent if it hadn’t been presented with such a lightness of touch. Sadly lightness has been entirely lacking from the touch of the giant ham hands of Brian Azzarello’s writing.

By Chiang, Azzarello, Wilson & Fletcher

I try not to be a complete idiot so I realise the staginess of Azzarello’s work is intentional. That’s okay, I don’t mind that; Jack Kirby’s comics read in much the same “stagy” way (but in a way that actually "works"; for me anyway, and I'm all that matters). But Azzarello takes it to excess. There’s this thing he does where there’s very little dialogue in a panel and it creates a kind of beat of silence as you move onto the next panel; this is a very stagy effect. It’s an intentional pause for the reader to digest what they’ve just read. It’s thus implicit that what you have just read is worth the extra seconds of contemplation your sluggishly bovine mind is humbly being afforded. And that’s okay in moderation (like heroin) and while it would be wrong to say Azzarello does it all the time, it feels like he does it all the time because he does it far too much. Chuck in the mannered phrasing and nearly every utterance becomes a self-consciously theatrical stentorian oration; as though every part were played by the worst melodramatists to ever tread the boards. It’s fine in moderation (like murder) but so much of it is just fucking wearying. And most of this pause for effect business is purely an invitation to bask luxuriantly in Azzarello’s majestic word play. Unfortunately the level of Azzarello’s word play is such that this is like being invited to bask luxuriantly in cow flops. And it’s everywhere, from the terrible titles (Throne To The Wolves, Icy France; the pain, the pain) to the dialogue (or direlogue; clever, eh? No.)   There is nothing remarkable in noticing that two different words sound the same and then using one in place of the other. it’s wordplay all right but it’s just play; there’s no serious import there, no further depth, no…it’s just farting about. It’s stagy stuff but it’s stagy to excess and…I don’t know but this isn’t an isolated case is it? Isn’t this what happens with comic writers now? They mistake their quirks and ticks for the reasons for their success and their work becomes just quirks and ticks. It just seems odd that in The Age of The Writer quite a lot of the time the writing is the crap you have to scrape past. I told you we’d get to that; the crap you have to scrape past. Thanks to the art then Wonder Woman was GOOD!

THE TRANSFORMERS VS. G.I. JOE #1 Art by Tom Scioli Written by Tom Scioli & John Barber Coloured by Tom Scioli Lettered by Tom Scioli Cover by Tom Scioli Transformers & G.I. Joe created by Hasbro IDW Publishing,$3.99 (2014)

In which two popular children's toy properties I have no clear knowledge of nor any fondness for combine, with the almost certain result that I will express hostility of an almost hateful stripe. Only Tom Scioli and John Barber have the power to avert this disaster; the rest of us can only watch...and pray.

It took an invasion by robots that can turn into cars and stuff but there’s no longer any hiding the fact that Scioli’s work was a sneak attack all along. Flying under The Flag of Jack it’s now revealed for all to see that all that Kirby inflected (KOIBY! infected) alt art attitudinising was all a feint; the real crown he sought to knock askew was that of Wallace Wood. For was there ever another artist who tamed the thrill of toy soldiers and delivered it on the comics page as wonderfully as Wallace Wood? No, Cochise, there was not for it was a hypothetical. From the isolated panels of tanks and trucks and swarming hordes which punctuated such exuberant fare as T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents to his greatest evocation of the child at play, M.A.R.S. Patrol, Wallace Wood ruled supreme in the toy box of every child's mind.

By Sciol & Barber

True to his era Wood’s soldiers were all kin to the one piece moulded plastic cast bought by the box in militaristic multiples but Scioli inhabits times Science Fictional by comparison. His roster of rip snortin’ gun toters are the larger, more articulated figures bought by the single in bubble pack mounted on board. Scioli with Barber channel the magic of play so well you can imagine the tips of their tongues protruding from their mouths as they did so while every panel is pregnant with the possibility that a humongous dog will run through it scattering all and sundry hither nd yon before slipping behind the sofa to slobberingly chew General Flagg's head off. And it all takes place on pages artificially aged so well that the only omission from the illusion are those flecks of dark matter which grace most old comics; those which one always suspects are fly shit. These are pages rich in play also with the very format of comics from the hand lettered SFX to the occlusion of speech by the Krackle and flare of gun fire. Not only have Scioli and Barber done Wallace Wood proud they have done it by producing 21st Century comics' first great work of art. Blowing no smoke up your ass here either; it's EXCELLENT!

It is a truth universally acknowledged that people who start a sentence with those words have probably not actually read any Jane Austen but will very probably have read some - COMICS!

Wait, What? Ep. 141: Tomorrow's Controversies Today

The Delight that was Tony Daniels' Detective Comics. From issue #1.

THANKSGIVING! CHRISTMAS! NEW YEAR'S! THE TERROR NEVER ENDS!

Actually, it's not really that bad, but all these holidays and holiday related get-togethers are keeping us very, very busy.  So!  After the show notes, please join us for two hours of desperate comics blabbity-blab and the show notes dedicated to same!

So...right, then.  Where were we? Ah, yes...

00:00-16:29: We are off and running, with a weirdo greeting, an equally weirdo response about the news of the death of Nelson Mandela, before moving on to discuss the Wonder Woman casting, so recently announced:  what did we think?  Our answers will surprise you!  Unless you figured our answers were gong to be a rambling, incomplete personal anecdote from Jeff and a disagreement between Jeff and Graeme about box office earnings, in which case you can pick up your winnings at Window Seven. (One day, I'll tire of the "people gambling about when Jeff and Graeme bring up a specific topic they seem obsessed on" joke, but that day is, I fear, a long, long way off.) 16:29-20:26: Graeme has been rereading the Villains Month issues to supplement his reading of Forever Evil, and schools Jeff on DC’s event. 20:26-45:42: A transition from the DC event to the Comixology Cyber-Monday sale of New 52 trades: what first volumes trades of the New 52 would Graeme have bought?  Which ones did Jeff buy?  Why did Jeff use “what” for one of those questions and “which” for the other?  Why so many rhetorical questions? Whyyyyy? Also discussed in this segment: a ton of Batman talk, and a long, shameful admission from Jeff about his love for Tony Daniel’s Detective Comics, the tragedy that is Hawkman, whether the awful is preferable to the competent, Jeff’s comics capriciousness this week, Rogues Rebellion by Brian Bucellato and Scott Hepburn, Suicide Squad by Matt Kindt and Patrick Zircher, and more! 45:42-1:12:14:  From there we get to Letter 44 from Charles Soule by Alberto Alburquerque, Morning Glories by Nick Spencer and Joe Eisma, the Lost school of storytelling, epic stories vs. small stories,  the awesome Sin Titulo by Cameron Stewart.  Also discussed: Geoff Johns’ Green Lantern, what’s going on with the upcoming Inhumans series?, and more! (About Forever Evil.) 1:12:14-1:34:24:  And this actually leads us quite nicely into a discussion of the Hunger Games movies—the first two films, the books by Suzanne Collins, storytelling, how they tie into Marvel movies exposition, this terrific review by Peter Rosenthal, and more. 1:34:24-1:57:11:  The Spider-Man 2 trailer: worth talking about briefly?  We think so?  The draw of Marvel characters as cinematic, as opposed to comic book, characters, the secret of Crocodile Dundee 2, and a very funny throwaway joke from Flight of the Conchords (Season One, of course!). Also,  Jeff finally talks about the Wonder Woman casting,  there is a surprisingly robust squabble where we end up yelling about the Hemsworth brothers, not letting the Internet cast movies, and... 1:57:11-end: Closing comments! A reminder that we will be off, yet again, next week…so remember to listen to Graeme and I argue about the Hemsworth brothers at least twice more!

Pretty snazzy, am I right?  Over two hours of comic book podcasting insanity -- actually, I don't think it's cool to talk about insanity as a value-added bonus, so maybe we should say "over two hours of comic book podcasting neuroses"...and really it's less than a minute and a half more than two hours, so... I kinda feel like maybe I should just leave it at snazzy, I guess.

Nonetheless!  It's on iTunes, and it is here for you as well:

Wait, What? Ep. 141: Tomorrow's Controversies Today!

As always, we thank you for listening and hope you enjoy!!

J_Smitty Gets it Together (6/19 Reviews!)

Still stinging with shame over his balky pull list J_Smitty gets it together, remembers his password and partially rights the ship.  

Wonder Woman #21

Azzarello / Chiang / Wilson

DC Comics $2.99

This issue heralds the return of Cliff Chiang and it’s not a moment too soon. Or, maybe it is too soon. Chiang will undoubtedly keep me on this read where I would have otherwise fallen off by now. Still, it’s not all doom and gloom. Azzarello feels to me as though he’s embracing a new supporting cast; largely leaving the gods (both G and demi) behind - or at least fallow – and moving in the direction of Kirby’s Fourth World “modern” pantheon. Orion seems to be a semi regular at this point and we get our first glimpse of New Genesis so we’re definitely trafficking in that vein.

Chiang is a lush stylist and among other gems here really lays on some impressive boom tube effects (though that may be a collaboration between himself and colorist Matt Wilson) and – as usual with Cliff – the EYES have it! Ah, see what I…anyway to the pretty!

Also of note, one character dies while defiantly chanting the lyrics to Millwall FC’s ode to hooliganism.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Millwall_F.C.#Supporters_and_hooliganism

Good job this year, Millwall, you lost to Wigan in the FA semis. Maybe (snicker) next year.

Conan the Barbarian #17

Wood / Gianfelice / Stewart

Dark Horse Comics $3.50

Conan’s bad acid trip continues in part two of three in The Nightmare of Shallows arc. A LOT happens in this so allow me to jump off a bit here.

After doing a brief run through of a fantasy version of his earlier imprisonment (Hint: It could be titled “How to Kill with Loose Masonry,”) Conan and Belit soldier on through their shared Yellow Lotus induced dream state.

Relaxing on a sedan chair in an air pocket of a sunken Khitai treasure ship (how cool is that, by the way?) Conan and Belit espouse their world views in a single exchange of dialogue:

Wood is at his best (for me) working through interpersonal dynamics. He has an ability to populate his characters with consistent viewpoints that don't just sound one note or as an echo of an overall writer’s voice. Belit’s presence throughout the series has put Conan on backfoot in an exploration of young love and how the immediacy, ferocity and depth of passion can be a simultaneously thrilling and blinding experience. Sure, it’s Romeo and Juliet dynamics but consider this:

In Conan’s savage history you get the sense that Belit was either the right woman at the wrong time (tragic, to be sure) or perhaps even more painfully the right woman at the right time. Wood is willing to travel that awkward road of hopes, weaknesses, fears and confusion in the midst of killing giant snakes and dropping acid.

For that brave dare alone, for allowing Conan’s new iteration a modicum of psychological flexibility, he should be lauded.

Davide Gianfelice works in the bold, minimal line style I enjoy for its representational flexibility (meaning it is recognizable and clear at any depth of scale) and despite the occasional tendency to oversexualize Belit (I preferred Cloonan’s weird Banshee) he is a VERY capable artist that works at a high level in what Dark Horse would do well to make their default “house style.”

Lastly, it would be CRIMINAL to undersell Dave Stewart’s coloring work. It delivers so much of the mood, sense of place and emotional context. The slightest bloom of a cheek as Conan and Belit embrace is a detail that is neither over or underplayed. Note perfect.

He is truly a super power in his world and a driving force of the Dark Horse look. If you need further evidence…

B.P.R.D. Hell on Earth # 108

Mignola & Arcudi / Campbell / Stewart

Dark Horse Comics $3.50

They say when you become a parent your whole life changes.

This…F#$%ing…Comic.

I’ve enjoyed the weird super spooky creepshow that has been B.P.R.D. and I will continue to buy it but this one finally put me over my comfort line for what horror really is and illuminated why I’ve always had such a difficult time processing it. It’s the destruction of innocence that really gets me. The awful fall of the unprotected and the gentle that makes me rage and have a fit.

All of this is done capably and horribly. It is a wrenching experience and all the determined semi-photo linework and deep, blazing color do their job very well indeed. You pained me this month, B.P.R.D. and you showed me something scary. Thank you and damn you. Also, Johann is well hard.

Invincible #103

Kirkman / Ottley / Rathburn / Rauch

Image Comics $2.99

Look, can we talk for a second? You need to start buying this book. It’s Spider-Man, all right? Great Cast, Great Action, Great Narrative. Kirkman goes to great pains to make sure each issue is accessible and comprehensible as a unit and as a whole. Ottley never met or imagined a thing he couldn’t draw free hand. Just do it as a favor to me. Ok? I don’t have much to say on it except it has held my attention for over a hundred issues and that’s not an accident.

Also, Twitter rec’d by Rob Liefeld! Err…

Batman Beyond Unlimited #17

Beechen

Archer

Fridolfs

Caldwell

Krul

Porter

Livesay

DC Comics $3.99

Whoa, that’s a lot of people.

In Brief:

JT Krul, not bad on the Superman peace pitch. Truth!

Howard Porter, your line has thinned somewhat! A positive change.

Adam Archer, you have a wonderful – WONDERFUL manga-esque Darwyn Cookery about you, sir. Also, you learned how to make that Batman “Oh sh!t” face from Norm Breyfogle. I know it. Good on you.

You uncredited guys at the back outdid the Geoff Johns version of the Shazam / Captain Marvel yearlong thing by about a million miles in two panels. That deserves a donut! Let me know where to mail it.

That’s the great thing about charting the world of the future in comics. No one gives a damn about it. Isn’t that weird?

Till next time when I make my case that ARMAGEDDON 2001 WAS THIIIIIIIIIS CLOSE TO BEING THE GREATEST EVENT CROSSOVER EVER CREATED.

Signing off in the Signature Savage Style:

BYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYE!

"Do They Still READ In The Future?" COMICS! Sometimes It's Great To Be Rude!

It was Half-Term last week hence the silence. Yes, the blessed silence. But now your God has failed you and I am back! It has been quietly suggested that I put on hold my tribute to Charlie Drake and maybe look at some comics this time. So, no actors who were dead before you grew your big teeth this time out. Just comics! Just lovely, lovely comics! But were they lovely? Hmmmmm? Anyway, this... NEXUS by Steve Rude & Mike Baron

ALL STAR WESTERN #20 Art by Moritat (Jonah Hex) and Staz Johnson (Stormwatch) Written by Justin Gray & Jimmy Palmiotti Coloured by Mike Atiyeh (Jonah Hex) & Rob Schwager (Stormwatch) Lettered by Rob Leigh Jonah Hex created by Tony DeZuniga & John Albano Stormwatch created by Brandon Choi & Jim Lee DC Comics, $3.99

I kind of liked this issue. I don’t know whether the worms have finally reached my brain, or what but twenty issues in and this one almost clicked. I’m not exactly the most demanding Jonah fan either, I just enjoy the scar faced twat in a hat going around kicking up dust and making life brutal, difficult and short for folks. I prefer it to be a straight western but it isn't a deal breaker.

Jonah Hex by Moritat, Gray & Palmiotti

No, I don’t mind Booster Gold turning up for no reason that is ever going to be explained (hey, that’s just how comic books roll these days). I’m just pleased the book has a bit of a spring back in its step. Maybe it’s the beneficial effect of getting Jonah out of the city and into the countryside? Like when you ferry troubled youths by coach out into the boondocks to stroke goats. Moritat’s art seems a bit more lively and engaged although that might be due to the brighter and more varied colour palette in use. Watch these backgrounds though, I’m not a native of the Americas but I’m pretty sure mesas aren't mobile. Like I say I don’t expect much really and this delivered that making it OKAY!

RED TEAM #2 Art by Craig Cermak Written by Garth Ennis Coloured by Adriano Lucas Lettered by Rob Steen Cover by Howard Victor Chaykin Red Team created by Craig Cermak & Garth Ennis(?) Dynamite, $3.99

More like RED MEAT amiright, soft lads? Here Comics’ Firmest Handshake Garth Ennis turns his surly attention to a tale of cops taking the law into their own hands. I’m sure that will work out really well for everyone involved. At the minute it isn't working out too well for me. I guess my LCS sent this as Howard Victor Chaykin is doing the covers and I like Comics’ Deepest Voice Garth Ennis’ war comics. So, okay, fair enough. I’m not turned off by the concept either. I’m always up for that old story which ends with a bunch of people dead or drenched in blood while sirens scream closer and those who aren't corpses suddenly realise why there are rules.

Red Team by Cermak & Ennis

Maybe it won’t go that way, after all Comics’ Hottest Curry Garth Ennis spends enough time (i.e. too much time) explaining how his characters can smoke in a government building that it must surely (surely!) pay off later in an example of Chekov’s Fags! Maybe everything will go swimmingly but the racially and sexually mixed cast will succumb to a series of smoking related diseases. Maybe not. But hopefully the series will avoid plummeting into maudlin sentimentality like a sloppy drunk slurring on about The Old Country as the barkeep dials for a taxi. Not an uncommon occurrence in work by Comics’ Softest Hearted Big Man Garth Ennis. This thing seems written for the screen (no, the page and the screen are not interchangeable) and the art just isn't up to the job of hiding this. It gives me no pleasure to say that. In fact I’ll leave it there except to express the hope that you really like that panel I picked because you’ll be seeing a lot of it on these pages. RED TEAM is not a complete wash though and that’s due mostly to the dialogue of Comics’ Hairiest Chest Garth Ennis. It’s good dialogue and it means RED TEAM is OKAY! That probably still won’t save me from a beating though.

THE SHADOW #13 Art by Giovanni Timpano Written by Chris Roberson Coloured by Fabricio Guerra Lettered by Rob Steen The Shadow created by Walter B. Gibson Dynamite, $3.99

Everything in this book is so familiar that the sight of your face in the shaving mirror delivers more surprises. This issue is impressive only in its devout refusal to bring anything new or interesting to bear on the join the dots plot with its transparent mystery, its space wasting reluctance to provide more than one speech bubble in a panel and…oh...look, there’s a three page sequence of a drunk man going home, going upstairs, pouring a drink and being surprised. No. That’s not comics, that’s just horseshit. I’m not even going to scan a picture of the contents as the fewer people who see this then the less damage done to those involved. Honestly, I’m doing them a solid here. Or a salad as they say in Nyawk. So, no offence to any of the people involved here as we all have bills to pay but this was AWFUL!

WONDER WOMAN: #20 Art by Goran Sudzuka & Cliff chiang Written by Brian Azzarello Coloured by Matthew Wilson Lettered by Jared K. Fletcher Wonder Woman created by William Moulton Marston and H. G. Peter DC Comics, $2.99

This is an atypically action packed issue but all too typically when the dust settles the forward plot motion is infinitesimal if not entirely illusory. With its large cast, stateliest of paces, squandered artistic talent and elevation of chat at the expense of incident it’s hard not to see WW as Azzarello’s attempt to bottle a bit of that drab Bendis magic. Luckily, despite his heroic efforts, Azzarello appears incapable of attaining such low levels of blandery. For starters his characters don’t sound like they are recovering from traumatic blows to the head; trading only in recursive whirlpools of bland doggerel. And every now and again something does happen. So, it’s an improvement but it’s still very far from being good. It still rarely rises above word play on a par with puzzles in the magazines old people in hospital spontaneously secrete in-between visiting times. Also, I think his cast have a problem with the booze. Although as the middle class assure us, if it’s wine it isn't alcoholism.

Wonder Woman by Chiang, Sudzuka & Azzarello

At some point in any given issue the chattering cast will mingle about some tasteful locale sipping drinks and hoovering up nibbles. Thankfully the medium of comics spares the reader the no doubt inevitable soundtrack of Toploader Orion snuck on to smooth things along. The whole thing is like one of those hellish networking soirees for people who do a bit of wee when they think about Powerpoint presentations. Except everybody is cosplaying Sandman and the evening ends abruptly when a big blue catfish in a crown stabs Simon from Accounts in the face. And puns! This issue’s highlight was when War asked, “Where’s my drink? You said you’d get me a Belgian White Beer!” and Wonder Woman replies “I beg your pardon, I never promised you a Hoegaarden!” Face it, Tiger; this book’s so far gone you’re not even sure if that happened. So it’s a fact that the crisp clarity of Goran Sudzuka and Cliff Chiang's art which brings this up to OKAY!

CREEPY #12 Art by Richard Corben, Richard P. Clark, Peter Bagge, Matthew Allison, Julian Totino Tedesco and Steve Ditko Written by Richard Corben, Ron Marz, Dan Braun, Peter Bagge, Matthew Allison, John Arcudi and Archie Goodwin Lettered by Nate Piekos of Blambot and Peter Bagge Dark Horse Comics, $4.99

There's the usal raggy grab bag of one pagers and spot illos but storywise we have:

Uncle Mangus by Richard Corben

Corben’s on first and Corben’s on form with a frivolous shamble of a shaggy corpse story. Corbenites won’t be disappointed as the shadows drape at strange angles across distorted faces, the undergrowth looks like gathia sticks from Bombay Mix, the borders are jagged when nerves become ragged and the horrific punchline is drawn with slapstick mixed with the ink. Yes, Richard Corben continues to defy Time itself and belligerently refuses to budge from VERY GOOD!

Uncle Mangus by Corben

Fishing by Ron Marz & Richard P. Clark Not entirely rote retelling of one of the usual variations on kids go fishing fear fables. Sorry, but EH!

Local Talent by Matthew Allison Allison's tale nicely conveys the grotty zest of late '70s foreign filmed schlock but would have conveyed it better in less space. Also, I know this charmingly cack cinematic genre was limited by budget but it's not a limitation shared by comic art, so c'mon let's have some backgrounds, son. Good enough for an OKAY!

The Spirit of The Thing by Ditko & Goodwin The Spirit of The Thing by Steve Ditko & Archie Goodwin

It’s Steve Ditko! "He is Dee Aye Tee Kay OH! He is Dee Aye Tee Kay OH! He’s Dee- delightful! Aye – Innovative! Tee- Totally not open to compromise on any point of principle upon which he has formulated an Objectivist stance! Kay – Kind of kooky! OH!- oooOOOOOOOOOOOOOOooooooooo! He is Dee Aye Tee Kay OH!" In this reprint Archie Goodwin does his usual solid scripting but it’s Ditko’s groovy grey wash German Expressionism that makes this one retain its VERY GOOD! kick lo these many decades after its original printing. It’s also a nice reminder that aficionados of Sturdy Steve should be salivating after the Creepy Presents…Steve Ditko volume that will be dropping imminently. Pre order from your LCS now, they'll appreciate it!

Pack Leader by Tedesco & Arcudi

Pack Leader by Julian Totino Tedesco & John Arcudi While Ditko and Corben get to VERY GOOD! on the merits of their art alone Arcudi and Tedesco’s tale reaches the same grade due to the success of their collaboration. This one really gels and even wrong-footed me at the last. That's nice. Arcudi and Tedesco knew what they were after and they went and got it. Nice work, fellas!

DARK HORSE PRESENTS #24 Dark Horse Comics, $7.99

BLACKOUT CHAPTER 1 Story and lettering by Frank Barbiere Art by Micah Kaneshiro Blackout created by Mike Richardson (?)

This one didn't grab me I’m afraid. With its slickly appealing tech sourced graphics and plot predicated on the promise of explanations further down the line it read like the tie-in to some video game I've never heard of. It’s only a few pages though so maybe it’ll pick up and improve from EH!

ALABASTER: BOXCAR TALES CHAPTER 6 Art and lettering by Steve Lieber Story by Caitlin R. Kiernan Coloured by Rachelle Rosenberg Alabaster created by Caitlin R Kiernan

My total indifference to this one is purely a case of it not being my cup of tea rather than any failure on the part of the creative team. I did read it but I couldn't tell you anything about it except it’s in space and usually it isn't. There are some talking animals and a lady, usually with a very broad accent, having magical adventures. Oh, she’s called Dancy Flammarion. Yeah, that’s me gone. I'm no Garth Ennis but fey’s not my thing, I fear. Disregarding my witless bias this is bound to be OKAY! Because Steve Lieber can sure draw nice and Caitlin R Kiernan writes proper books (she should not be confused with Caitlin Moran who doesn't). The most interesting thing was how disproportionately irritated I was by the bit where the team tell us what they were listening to when they created the strip. It was really distracting. I mean was Kiernan really listening to the Sunshine OST? Why? Was it just because it’s the soundtrack to a movie set in space? That’s a stunningly literal approach isn't it? What did she do when it was finished? Start again? Stop writing?

Like a real asshole I find it all a bit disingenuous when creators share stuff like this with us. No one ever says they were listening to Phil Collins or Cher do they? Ever. Yeah, right. Have you seen some of the people who make comics? Seriously. I mean that guy who always does that stupid thing in photos with his face so it looks like a wet thumb sliding down a window is a Foreigner fan and no mistake. Look into your heart, you know it is true. Anyway, this stuff's just the thin end of the wedge, next thing you know they're telling you about their substance abuse problems, how many kids they have or whether they get to put the fairy on top of the Christmas tree. Being an unfeeling automaton it’s just not something I need to know about creators. I mean, does it do any of you any good to know I wrote this while listening to SWANS’ Time is Money (Bastard)? Oh, alright it was Cher. "Do you belieeeeeeeeve!?!"

Bloodhound by Jolley, Kirk & Riggs BLOODHOUND: PLAIN SIGHT CHAPTER 2 Art by Leonard Kirk & Robin Riggs Written by Dan Jolley Coloured by Moose Baumann Lettered by Rob Leigh Bloodhound created by Dan Jolley & Drew Johnson

This is a revival of a defunct DC property which has now been given back to the creators to do with as they will. I believe DC also returned the less than successful Monolith property to its creators recently too. This is really rather sporting of DC and we should probably acknowledge that before reminding ourselves of their treatment of Alan Moore. It appears that the lesson here is that if you create anything successful for DC they will line up and bang you like a shit house door. Meanwhile the creators of Bloodhound have decided to put it in DHP. I liked this series when it first appeared and I still like it despite the pony tail our hero sports. He’s kind of like a government sanctioned Punisher with all his marbles and a beer belly who targets super villains. This is just a short three parter so the mystery tends to be cleared up by the characters approaching each suspect, the suspect immediately breaking down and pointing to the next suspect and then the villain breaking cover to provide a thrilling cliff hanger. Brevity isn’t doing it any favours is what I’m saying. But I still find the premise promising, the characters solid and the art pleasant enough for it to be OKAY!

BRAIN BOY CHAPTER 2 Art by Freddie Williams II Written by Fred Van Lente Coloured by Ego ("The Living Colourist"?) Lettered by Nate Piekos of Blambot Brain Boy created by Gil Kane & herb Castle

Although it’s not explicitly stated I guess this is an update of Herb Castle and Gil Kane’s 1962 creation for the faster paced and more luridly violent Now. Since Dark Horse published a pricey hardback of these (old and very probably nuts) tales you’d think they might want to draw attention to this. Weird. Anyway, the update is definitely fast and bloody and it’s not without its charms. Chief amongst these are Van Lente’s witty revisionism best exemplified by the call centre riff and the ‘magic cereal' which fools no one. Artwise Williams II has obviously thought long and hard and come to some definite conclusions about how to draw our hero’s nose. I can’t speak with any surety as to the conclusions he’s reached but there’s definitely something going on with Brain Boy’s hooter. Oh, it all bounces along in a lively if not altogether logical fashion, which makes it GOOD!

Nexus by Rude & Baron

TREKKER: THE TRAIN TO AVALON BAY CHAPTER 1 Story and art by Ron Randall Coloured by Jeremy Colwell Lettered by Ken Bruzenak Trekker created by Ron Randall

It's super-nice that an old lag like Randall has his own creator owned property. It's less agreeable to report I found the whole future bounty hunting lady with sad past thing a tad too generic for my fussy palate. I am certain there is an audience for this but I adamant I am not amongst their number. I wish Randall well in all his travels but this, for me, was EH!

KING'S ROAD: THE LONG WAY HOME CHAPTER 2 Art by Phil Winslade Written by Peter Hogan Lettering by Steve Dutro

Oooh! It's a high concept! What if the kids from a book very similar to (but. lawyers take note, not the same as) The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe grew up and had kids who didn't know about their adventures and then The Evil Returned and the kids had to take up arms on behalf of their paunchy and totes dull 'dults?!? This. That's what. No doubt Hogan will be exploring the Christian symbols underlying his borrowings with the same rigour and aplomb as his source. Or at least get a movie deal. Just joking! This is a promising (if not a little cheeky) premise and it's made all the more attractive thanks to Winslade's endearingly gangly characters. Although these do inhabit a blurry world of boisterous blooms of colour, the intensity of which suggest Mr. Winslade should pop down the opticians pretty sharpish or at least dial his PC settings down a bit. Maybe I'm getting soft in my dotage but this was OKAY!

CRIME DOES NOT PAY: CITY OF ROSES CHAPTER 5 Art by Patric Reynolds Written by Phil Stanford Colours by Bill Farmer Lettering by Nate Piekos of Blambot Crime Does Not Pay: City of RosesCity Of Roses created by Patric Reynolds & Phil Stanford

This is EH! due to the perfunctory writing and the weirdly flaky looking art. It isn't terrible but it isn't terribly exciting either. Everybody thinks crime comics are easy and nearly everyone is wrong. Everyone except David Lapham. Christ, I miss STRAY BULLETS. Why can't Dark Horse Presents find room for new David Lapham genius? WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY???? WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!

NEXUS: INTO THE PAST CHAPTER 2 Art by Steve Rude Written by Mike Baron Lettered by Steve Rude Coloured by Glenn Whitmore Nexus created by Steve Rude & Mike Baron

Eventually every open ended continuing narrative strip gets to Jack the Ripper, it's likely that they get to Sherlock Holmes too, but only Nexus would throw in H.G. Wells without overbalancing, without even wobbling in fact. It's Nexus so it's VERY GOOD! In fact I'll tell you this: I'd never read Nexus until it appeared in DHP but once it did I ordered Vol.1 of the Omnibooks pretty darn lickety split. I would imagine there is no higher praise a comic creator can receive than a sale. We'll be coming back to Nexus at some point. Aw, yeah!

HUNTER QUAID: ARMAGEDDON OUT OF HERE Art by Melissa Curtin Written by Donny Cates & Eliot Rahal Coloured by Lauren Affe Lettered by Lauren Affe Hunter Quaid created by Donny Cates & eliot Rahal

I couldn’t get a grip on this one. It’s like something an artist would do to showcase their style but it has a writer, no, two writers? And they are the creators but it's the art that is the stand out feature? I don’t know. I don't get that. It looks nice but, hey, that’s all you need sometimes. It was OKAY! but only because of the artist.

Villain House by Wheeler

VILLAIN HOUSE CHAPTER 4 By Shannon "Papa" Wheeler

It’s a kind of testament to the durability and depth of the concepts at the heart of Jack Kirby and Stan Lee’s Fantastic Four that half a century later it still provides fertile soil for trees of mirth like this. As mirth trees go this is a sturdy beech indeed. This is some funny stuff right here from the surly insistence of 'Not The Thing' that everything bad is Communist to the laser targeted title of “Invisible Wife” and beyond. The laughs aren't empty either, there’s a sympathetic villain whose world is ruined by a bunch of powered berks getting all up in his business to hilariously disastrous, but not unmoving, effect. I’d hazard a guess this strip is somewhat more refreshing and engaging than yet another modernisation of an old Kirby & Lee classic. ( “Yo, Yo, Yo! Ben Grimm is Totes Sad, Bro! (Ch-Ch-Ch-check out Mi Tumb-LAH!!!)”) Wheelers’ treat of a tummy tickler may not beat the ultimate yukkifier of Don Simpson’ s Yarn Man and “Golly! That crazy gizmo really works!” but it comes closer than most in a very small space. And that’s VERY GOOD!

Christ, I think I sprained something back there. And now I know why people don't review anthologies. I still don't understand why they don't buy em. They're stilll - COMICS!!!

Wait, What? Ep. 114: Everything We Could Stand

Jaxxon drawing by our very own renaissance man, Graeme McMillan...

Skip week is over so we are back for another episode or two (we will probably skip Valentine's Day, I am betting that right now). Before we get into it, though: look at that Jaxxon! What a great drawing of a very old, obscure Star Wars character that I dearly love! Well done, Mr. Graeme McMillan, well done.  Please email me if you want to be part of the crew that tries to peer pressure Graeme into drawing more comics...

After the jump: Love! Links! Show notes!

So, yes.  Links first, eh?  Long-time listeners should be not at all surprised that we are fans of ol' Jaxxon (the space bunny portrayed above).  And, similarly, you may remember that we both have much love for Mike Russell's Sabretooth Vampire.  So imagine my delight to come across the link for "Jaxxon's 11," a Star Wars fan comic by Russell and David Stroup--it's currently incomplete but, hey!  68 pages of old-school Star Wars nerdery.  For free!

All right.  Let's get our show notes on, shall we?

0:00-3:03: "Previously on Wait, What?"  An introduction/apologia/master plan/what have you with a super-brief discussion of our skip week time off and then moving right into… 3:03-25:33:  issues of Green Lantern's Rise of the Third Army crossover that Graeme has read, and our befuddlement about Geoff Johns and the current state of the Green Lantern franchise generally. 25:33-32:31: Graeme also received a copy of the Batman & Robin Annual and quite liked it! Jeff read Batman Inc. #7 and was squirrelly about it!  Also, thanks to the continuing recommendations of Martin Gray over at Too Dangerous for a Girl, Jeff also read Superman Family Adventures issues #8 and 9 and greatly enjoyed those! Yep, you should think about picking those up. 32:31-38:59:  Speaking of cute, Graeme points out that the Comixology collection of Superboy has gotten up to issue #50 of the '90s run, which means Karl Kesel and Tom Grummett's "Last Boy on Earth" storyline is now easily available for Kirby fans like me who'd missed it the first time around!  Also, currently on sale (at least by the time I initially post this) and verrrry tempting at .99 an issue:  Green Lantern Mosaic. 38:59-39:34: Soulful Intermission #1 39:34-51:48: And we're back: with more Green Lantern talk (for a moment or two).  And with more personal chit-chat, as Jeff tells how he and Edi survived their first sleepover with their three year old niece.  Somewhat longish, very little comic book talk is involved (although there is some chit-chat about Dora The Explorer) and obviously should be considered optional and bonus material.  Will not be covered on the final exam. 51:48-54:34:  Comic book news! There's…not much.  Although we do discuss the terrifying process of WTF certification DC Comics is putting forward. 54:34-59:22: Wonder Woman #16!  Jeff has some words about it. 59:22-1:06:57: By contrast, Jeff has other words that he has to use about the other comic, Flash #16.  Some other chit-chat ensues about the DC New 52 books (specifically, Action).  On a similar-but-different note, Graeme picked up the trade of New Deadwardians after hearing Jeff singing its praises and also quite liked it. That means New Deadwardians is two-for-two on the Wait, What? Approval Meter and you should considering picking it up. 1:06:57-1:14:29: We're just about ready to get to questions (no, really) but we thought it perhaps prudent to talk about Uncanny Avengers #3 first. 1:14:29-1:32:11: Oh, and Avengers issues #3 and #4. Yeah, a lot of talk about Avengers #3 and #4. 1:32:11-1:36:59:  And then there were….Questions!  Kid Showbusiness on December 6th, 2012 at 1:48 pm asked:  What’s your take on this Jonathan Hickman quote: “Most of the talent creating books at Marvel are fairly progressive, so generally we all want diversity in the abstract,” he said. “The problem comes from the fact that the catalog of Marvel (and DC) characters are predominantly straight white male because of the era they were conceived in — and it’s the basic building blocks of what we have to work with. Which begets the question: Well Jonathan, if this is really one of the root causes of the problem, if you really feel that way — if you’re not a fraud — why don’t you just go create some new, more diverse characters? “Which is where things get tricky,” he continued. “In light of numerous historical examples, contractual realities, and the shelf life of creators, is it really in a creator’s best interest to be making brand new IP for the big companies on the cheap? I mean, we still do it sometimes, because, frankly, we can’t not…it’s in our DNA as storytellers and problem solvers — but is it the ‘right’ thing to do? Would it be right for people to ‘expect me’ to do that? I don’t think so. But that’s just one example — There are others (some even more negative, plenty positive).” 1:36:59-1:48:49:  George T on December 6th, 2012 at 1:54 pm asked: 1) I have never read an Avengers comic. If I were to read one issue of the Avengers what should it be? 2) I have never watched or read any Dr Who. What is a good place to pick it up? Other than 1966… 1:48:49-2:06:33:  Mike Loughlin on December 6th, 2012 at 4:41 pm said: 1) Which Marvel and DC characters that headline their own books or are members of a team should be put aside for a year or two? Which Marvel and DC characters have been poorly-written the longest? 2) If the Big 2 super-hero comics were redesigned to be more all-ages- and woman-friendly, do you think sales would increase? Has the new readers ship already sailed? Also mentioned in there somewhere, is Chad Nevett's amazing blog-a-thon over at Graphic Content   and Comics Should Be Good, where you can catch Graeme and Chad talking Peter David's Star Wars books, Chad and I swapping thought on Jim Starlin's Dreadstar, Tucker Stone bringing the pain, and much, much more. 2:06:33-end: Closing comments! Natalie Imbruglia! Our first podcast without any discussion of Misfits in almost a month. And only twenty some-odd questions to go. Wow!

Amazing, eh?  Yes, Graeme and I thought so too, undoubtedly.  As you know, we've got ourselves a little ranch out on the iTunes/RSS frontier, you can stop by any time you like.  But you can also kick up your boots and sample our wares below, if preferred:

Wait, What? Ep. 114: Everything We Could Stand

As always, we hope you enjoy and stop by next week for the next one!

Wait, What? Ep. 111: Things That Go Wrong...

It's....not easy to explain. Trust me.

Oh, man.  Remember all the questions you guys asked us and we didn't get to?  Well, don't say we didn't start 2013 right!

After the jump:  Show notes,  no more terrifying photos, still kissing with saliva, etc., etc.

0:00-12:00:  Greetings!  Before the comics talk, Graeme and Jeff catch up with what they did during the holidays.  Unsurprisingly, Jeff got sick and moped.  Even less surprisingly, Graeme worked. And worked.  And worked.  Other exciting topics covered:  inadvertent tech problems, deliberate tech problems, Cocoa Pebbles, Cocoa Puffs, and Cocoa Krispies and Honey Monster, the Sugar Puffs mascot. 12:00-29:03: Jeff talks about the first season of American Horror Story, which is another "what we did during the holidays" topic, and that leads into a discussion about things that go wrong, TV, and includes mention of The West Wing and Agatha Christie's Tommy and Tuppence.  And, just as we almost start talking about comics, we swerve and talk about Misfits about which, in a weird reversal of the status quo, Jeff is caught up on and Graeme is not.  Also, you will never know how much coughing I had to edit out to make this sound at all listenable, but it was kind of a lot.  Some of them I had to keep in so we could (sort of) hear Graeme.  Sorry about that. 29:03-36:16:  Graeme lists the comics he's read! Hey everybody, we're talking about comics!  Well, starting to talk about comics! Well, almost…starting to…talk… 36:16-36:52: Intermission Uno! 36:52-38:52:  Hey, who has two thumbs and has been interviewed again by Canadian Television? This guy….Graeme McMillan, whom we all know.  Yes, CL Cool Graeme (Canada Loves Cool Graeme) is burning up the airwaves. 38:52-56:58:  Comics!  We were supposed to talk about all those books Graeme listed so of course…we don't talk about them.  Instead, we talk about Amazing Spider-Man #700. 56:58-1:05:35: And from there, we talk a spot of news--the promotions of Bob Harras and Hank Kanalz over at DC. Also, those great lists of CE's top-selling books for 2012. 1:05:35-1:05:50: And so…we finally get around to talking about the list of comics Graeme bought!  Or….do we? (Hint: we don't). 1:05:50-1:06:38: Intermission Two! 1:06:38-1:07:23: And we're back…and the sound is a bit hinky for some reason? Have we thanked you for continuing to listen to us recently?  We really should! 1:07:23-1:23:23:  Remember that list of comics Graeme mentioned way back when?  Here it is! A delightful batch of old issues Graeme picked up at his local comic book shop's sale: Batman and the Outsiders Annual #1 (1984); DC Comics Presents #60 (Superman and Guardians of the Universe);    Machine Man #10 by Marv Wolfman and Steve Ditko; Micronauts Annual #1 (1979); Mr. Miracle Special by Mark Evanier and Steve Rude (1987); and the DC Comics Mystery In Space DC Presents One-Shot (2004) featuring Elliot S! Maggin & J.H. Williams III, and Grant Morrison & Jerry Ordway. 1:23:23-1:39:12: Also, something comics-related(!):  Graeme and I talk Final Crisis since both of us (weirdly enough) had re-read it in the last month or so:  ccontinuity, the New 52, reverse time, and issues of race, are among the subjects of our conversational hand-wringing. Then…techpocalypse forces us to cut things short in mid-convo and try again. 1:39:12-1:39:32: Intermission 3! 1:39:32-1:42:35: And we are back! (After a few failed attempts, which were a bit on the crazy-making side of things?)  So it's back to more Final Crisis talk--where are those Batman issues?  What about the Legion of 3 Worlds? 1:42:35-end: And now on to some quick chat about new comics--Flash #15 and its amazing second half by Francis Manapul; New Avengers #1 by Jonathan Hickman and Steve Epting (including a shout-out to Abhay's fantastic commentary on Hickman's Secret); Sachie-Chan Good!! by Akira Toriyama and Masakazu Katsura (which inspires Graeme to recount the "Miss Universe" pitch from the Downey Files podcast); Batman Inc. #6; Saga #8; Wonder Woman #15; Fatale #11 by Brubaker and Phillips; Prophet #32; Godzilla: The Half-Century War #4; Witch-Doctor: Mal Practice #2; and (digitally) the first volume of Kikaider by Shotaro Ishinomori (sooooo good!)  And then a little after the two hour mark--we are finished!  For now. [Cue ominous music...]

As I'm a bit out of practice, a bit sick, and staring down the barrel of an early wake-up call, let me just cut through the niceties and say: it's good to be back!  (Hold up, brain: isn't that a nicety right there?)  And blah blah blah blah iTunes, but also right here, and so on:

Wait, What? Ep. 111: Things That Go Wrong

Ah, but no worries we will be back next week--here is to a Happy New Year to all and, as you may have guessed, we thank you for listening!

"Mr. Dazzleby Has Promised To Be Kind And True." COMICS! Sometimes It's Four Divided By Zero Plus One!

I've heard some people only read Marvel comics! Also, some people only read DC Comics! That's okay, 99% of all psychiatrists agree - compartmentalisation is really healthy! It's also okay because I only wrote about some DC Comics! Marvel people will have to wait a bit. I know, I know but I'm sure you'll find the wherewithal to cope. Next: words...

WONDER WOMAN #0 Art By Cliff Chiang Written by Brian Azzarello Colours by Matt Wilson Lettering by Jared Fletcher DC Comics, £2.99 (2012) Wonder Woman created by William Moulton Marston

Throughout this comic Cliff Chiang provides outrageously gorgeous artwork, I just want to make that clear. Because as lovely as his work is it can in no way distract from the petty failures of Azzarello's script. This reads like an attempt to channel the scripts of old complete with their overwrought narration and abundance of redundant information.  In the hands of a respectful and talented writer this would be a cute homage, a neat tip of the hat, a cheeky wink, a clever and enjoyable comic. But not here. Azzarello's bitterness and contempt for the work of all those who came before him is evident on every chippy little page. The first narrative caption contains not only this creepily layered insult to both readers and women, "the monthly monster strikes again!"  but goes on tell us the tale originally appeared in "All-Girl Adventure Tales For Men".

I imagine the intention was to be humorous but I don't have to imagine that the reality is so soured with loathing for the audience, the self and even the genre that  it's a relief when the curdled homage ends a few pages later. Yes, because as primitive and rubbish as we are implicitly assured the writing was in comics of yore, it's actually beyond Brian Azzarello's sophisticated and modern talents to replicate at even a satirically joshing level for a full issue. As base as they were he can't do it. Which is the best joke of all. It's thanks only to Chiang, Wilson and Fletcher that the book hovers around GOOD!

ACTION COMICS #0 Art by Ben Oliver, Cafu Written by Grant Morrison, Sholly Fisch Colours by Brian Reber, Jay David Ramos Lettered by Steve Wands, Dezi Sienty DC Comics, £3.99 (2012) Superman created by Jerry Siegel & Joe Shuster

Unlike the assured work in his BATMAN books (work so assured that it it kind of glosses over how bad some of it is) I've not found Grant Morrison's run on ACTION COMICS to be terribly convincing. It's had the air of him having been asked if it's still his dream job to write a regular Superman comic, to which he's replied, "Hoots! Aye tha ken right, maboab! When am ah starting?" And then he's been told "Er, we need twenty two pages in the next five minutes." "Crivvens!" indeed! The results have been a bit patchy to say the least. Although maybe it's just that he was writing in a burning temple. That would put anyone off.

(I guess I should apologise for that outrageous descent into Jockface but I'm sure you understand that I am an artist and, even though I’m very far removed from Scots culture, I really love it. I don’t even eat a lot of shortbread, I eat a lot of fish and chips but the fascination with the Scots remains part of our everyday British culture. It would be wrong of me not to rip the piss. Also, Grant Morrison is really acting like a bowffing staigie these days.)

It's just a bad comic all over but you can see how it could have been a good comic had some time been spent whipping it into proper shape. Children being saved from awfulness by the sheer Goodness of Superman should be a slam dunker but this thing is under-worked at both words and art level. Underworked to the extent that the art isn't even art at times, it just flat out descends into silhouettes like a cack handed Han Dynasty Chinese shadow play rather than a Twenty First Century American comic-book. As it is the whole thing is a lost cause anyway; totally scuppered by its failure to decide where it stands on quiffs. Initially the quiff is seen as a force for good, embodied in the choice of basing Superman on Film Critic and All Round Good Egg Mark Kermode.  Yet later a drunk child abuser (boo!) is introduced sporting the self same pompadour. Mixed messages are one thing but if a comic can't even decide where it stands on the morality of a haircut it's pretty much bound to be EH!

ALL STAR WESTERN#0 Art by Moritat (and Pia Guerra) Written by Jimmy Palmiotti and Justin Gray Coloured by Mike Atiyeh Lettered by Rob Leigh DC Comics, £3.99 (2012) Jonah Hex created by John Albano and Tony DeZuniga

Fortuitously for the writers Jonah Hex has had an eventful life because then they can just fill the pages offhandedly routinely recounting his doings in a manner that would make the personification of Perfunctory raise her fan to her face and blush. This happened, then this happened and later this happened? that's not actually a story. It's things happening. There's no attempt to add anything to Jonah's story it's just: Jonah's Dad was violent but not a drunk, now Jonah's Dad is violent and a drunk, etc. It's just there. Moritat is clearly overworked here but he does manage the odd panel that it's worth lingering over amongst all those that you'd rather rush past in embarrassment. Despite the rote plodding of the writing thanks to Moritat's occasionally interesting art and a travelling salesman called "Mr. Dazzleby" the comic manages to be OKAY!

Sometimes people point out that they don't like that rasher of skin connecting Jonah's upper and lower jaw. Somehow this weakens the whole character for them. Luckily I ignore my family and think about things like that, important things. Yes I'm here to help. Place your forefinger at the point at which your lips meet, now place your thumb at the point where your teeth stop and your jawbone begins (you will have to press against the flesh until you feel the difference), now move your forefinger in a rough circle between its starting point and where your thumb has paused. Imagine that that flesh has been cut away. Hi ho! There you go! The mystery of Jonah's strange face solved. Next!

BATMAN INCORPORATED#0 Art by Frazer Irving Written by Grant Morrison (story by Grant Morrison & Chris Burnham) Coloured by Frazer irving Lettered by Pat Brosseau DC Comics, £2.99 (2012) Batman created by Bob Kane

Even though Frazer Irving's art is obviously rushed, veering wildly from the astonishing to the embarrassing, and he badly fluffs the final "beat" with the boomerang his work here is still fascinating in a really pleasing way. I like the way the colours are presented as just shapes and your eye has to skitter about the image, like a spider seeking shelter when you suddenly switch the light on, until it gleans enough information to figure out what the Holy Mother of Pearl it's looking at. Your eye that is, not the spider.

Maybe that's why the story here works so well. Because it isn't really a story it's more a of a sleight of hand in which a jumble of moments manages to create enough mental connections in the mind of the reader to make it seem as though a coherent narrative has occurred. It's a neat trick. A good enough trick in fact for the comic to be GOOD!

SUPERMAN FAMILY ADVENTURES #5 Art by Art Baltazar Written by Art Baltazar and Franco DC Comics, £2.99 (2012) Superman created by Jerry Siegel & Joe Shuster

I buy this comic for Johnk(UK) V.2.0 in the hope that he will also wish to waste large amounts of his life on blathering on witlessly about the artform known as comics. Yes, he enjoys this but then so do I. I enjoy it for lots of reasons beyond the fact that I am a child-like simpleton. I enjoy the fact it is quite sophisticated in its treatment of the Olsen-Lane-Kent dynamic. Lois knows Clark's secret she just pretends she doesn't and Clark knows she knows and that she is pretending she doesn't while Jimmy is just comically plain vanilla oblivious.

Also, I like the Super-pets and this comic is the only place you can see them unless the main DCU finally matured enough to stop being embarassed of its heritage in exactly the same way that a teenager is embarassed by their parents. Look, the book's neat stuff. A lot of the time I have no idea what is going on, but that's okay. Even when it is just brightly coloured gibberish the kids seem to understand. And since that's who it's for this is VERY GOOD!

I hope you all had a nice weekend and enjoyed some COMICS!!!

Wait, What? Ep. 100: Year Zero

(One of my favorite hundredth issue covers, by Joe Staton and Dick Giordano for DC Comics)

I don't know why, but for a moment there... I was very afraid this episode wouldn't end up existing?  I think because, you know, you say something is a thing, as opposed to just being business as usual, and the next thing you know there's a certain nimbus of expectation around it, even if only to yourself?  Sometimes it  seems like that kind of nimbus makes the best kind of target for capricious fate...

Anyway, enough of that "and then he tore his eyes out in the fifth act!" musing, join us behind the jump for show notes and celebratory waffles, yes?

0:00-8:24: Graeme brings a message to piss Jeff off...from the future!  What can it be? Hint: Before Watchmen is involved.  Laughs are had and the distance between qualified and unqualified is considered.

8:24-20:54: And on a related note--time for some red-hot sexy DC New 52 Issue #0 talk.  Batman, Inc. #0, Batwoman #0, Wonder Woman #0, Supergirl #0, Justice League #0, Earth 2 #0, and OMAC and DC Universe Presents #0.  Warning: Graeme has read 38 of these by now.  I mean that's...wow.

20:54-46:59: ASM is being cancelled!? Jughead is going on hiatus?! (A reference to) cats and dogs living together under the same roof?! What the hell is happening?

Also, Graeme has the chance to have some quality time with the listeners. Also also, in the coming attractions end of thing, we discuss how Bendis' X-Men is shaping up, in light of Avengers Vs. X-Men #11. Additionally, we run down Professor X's CV. If you want to guys remembering off the top of their heads the names of Hank McCoy and Bobby Drake's old girlfriends, this is where you want to be.

46:59-54:59: Mattotti and Zentner's The Crackle of the Frost.  We actually talk about it, finally!

54:59-1:13:33: And from there, Jeff and Graeme go on to discuss Jennifer Blood, as conceived by Garth Ennis and executed by Al Ewing.

1:13:33-1:22:51: And from one crime book to another, we also talk about Stumptown issue 2.1 by Greg Rucka and Matthew Southworth. With special guest appearances by John Updike and J.D. Salinger!

1:22:51-1:30:24: And from there we got to Dave Stevens' The Rocketeer?  I think it says something great about the current state of the comics marketplace that we can talk about three different type of pulp stories that are still a long ways away from superhero books.  Also, it's Graeme's turn to take a powder while Jeff gets to talk directly with the listeners.

1:30:24-2:16:04: Phone calls! From listeners!  We have them, and they are awesome.  Many thanks to Voodoo Ben, Alex, Robert G., Sean Witzke, J.L. Blair (whose call did not survive the round-the-world treatment, sadly and whom I initially misidentify, to boot) and Derek (or Garrett?).  Though most of the calls are just well-wishes, we do tackle a suggested topic--Jim Starlin at Marvel in the '70s, '80s and '90s--at some length, as per Alex's request.  Who says this isn't the Golden Age for Whatnauts?

2:16:04-2:26:31: Jeff, whose attention span is crushed, all but leaps in mid-answer from talking about Hank Pym to discussing Bloodshot.  Graeme, for his part, has been catching up on old issues of Milestone Shadow Cabinet issues. Add 'em all together and you get...Chaykin's Black Kiss 2 #2?  Not really, but we end up talking about that as well as well as the pretty brilliant (non-comix, though there's a chart or two) book by Jarett Kobek, If You Won't Read, Then Why Should I Write?

2:26:31-end: And then, because it wouldn't be a Wait, What? podcast without goofy technical difficulties, Graeme turns into the Lord of the Flies again, a clear sign to sign off. (Although we also manage to praise Bandette #2, Double Barrel, the xckd strip Click & Drag, and Dustin Harbin's Boxes before we're done).  At one point, I'm laughing while Graeme is talking, and it just sounds like there should be the sounds of a building burning down and maybe some backmasked electric guitars...which is maybe the most fitting way to celebrate our hundredth episode?  Lord only knows what we'll sound like by episode 150....

Anyway, you should be able to find it on iTunes (although there's now that whole bullshit separate app for Podcasts, can you believe it?) as well as your RSS feeder of choice.  Alternately, you can take a swing at the audio pinata below:

Wait, What? Ep. 100: Year Zero

And then next week...Ep. 101?  (Man, I gotta go fan myself on the divan at the thought of it!) In any event, whether this is your first time listening to Wait, What? or your one hundredth, we hope you enjoy and thank you for listening!

Wait, What? Ep. 98: Gorilla With An Eyepatch

Gorilla with an eyepatch/ I know, I know/ It's really serious... from Boom!'s Betrayal of the Planet of the Apes by Corinna Bechko and Gabriel Hardman

We are creeping ever-closer to magic number 100, as you are probably aware.  But, hey, why fixate on the future?  There's every possibility the world could be thrown into cataclysmic upheaval, giving rise to a world of intelligent rifle-wielding apes that, as here, look cooler than all hell.

So let's just pay attention to where we're at, and what's happening now, and also...show notes!

0:53-3:53:  Some tough work engagements for Graeme this week!  Let him tell you about it.

3:53-11:23:   For example, Graeme talks the Siegel-Schuster lawsuit and the recent article written about the Schuster side of the lawsuit.  For those of you who like Mr. McMillions when he's having ambivalent feelings, these seven and a half minutes are for you.

11:23-19:48:  And then in this corner... Rob Liefeld vs. DC, just weeks after aggravating Marvel's editors. Are you on Team Rob or Team Big Two? (Or is there no Team Big Two?)

19:48-22:41:  And then one of those wacky tech problems pop up and necessitate a call back.  Minor slight delay and then minor chitchat about the Internets.

22:41-38:18: Back to Rob Liefeld vs DC:  Graeme talks about why this story will blow things open wide for DC, while Jeff is not so sure.  It moves into a conversation about emotional attachments to creators, companies, and concepts.

38:18-42:28:  Challenged about what comics can be read in five minutes, Jeff talks briefly about the twelfth issues of Flash, Batwoman, and Wonder Woman, and compares them a bit with Batman, Inc. #3.

42:28-49:08:  Also, Jeff has lots of good things to say about the Betrayal of the Planet of the Apes trade paperback with gorgeous art by Gabriel Hardman (see above) and a strong script by Hardman and Corinna Bechko.  As an Apehead who's late to this book, I have to say it's pretty darn great.

49:08-56:26: And as we are on a recommending roll, Graeme recommends the first issue of Mark Waid and Chris Samnee's Rocekteer: Cargo of Doom.

56:26-1:05:04:  And then, just to keep the balance, Graeme reviews Before Watchmen: Dr. Manhattan #1.  He... is not pleased. The phrase "eye-bleedingly bad" may end up being used.  A bit of stuff about BW: Rorschach is included for your enjoyment.

1:05:04-1:14:08:  Also under Graeme's four color microscope, Amazing Spider-Man #692.  (Jeff requests you ignore most of his comments in this section as they are even more befuddled than usual. Thx.)

1:14:08-1:37:21:  Invited to talk about stuff he's read and liked this week, Jeff declines and instead chooses to complain about...movies.  More specifically, Captain America The First Avenger which is on Netflix Watch Instantly. Also discussed: The Bourne Legacy and Battleship.

1:37:21-1:42:30:  Of course, that trifecta of movie cannot help but inevitably lead to Graeme talking about...Bunheads.  Well, sure.  Of course.

1:42:30-1:54:22:  And then, because somehow we end up out of time, we mention more comics we also find noteworthy SAGA #6, Fatale #7, Batman Inc. #3, Mind MGMT #4, and Glamourpuss #26.  Also some speedy head-scratching from Jeff about the Butcher Baker blow-up.  What does it mean to be a critical darling? Is there a "tastemaker" for comics on the Internet?

1:54:22-end:  And here is where we open up the question to you, our listeners:  have you ever bought a book based on something we said?  If so, what and how'd it go?  Who are the people in the comics blogosphere you consider tastemakers?  We want to know!  So you know...sound off in the comments, please.

Maybe this auditory apparition has haunted the forlorn witch-house called iTunes, perhaps not.  But you can cross the streams, so to speak (not recommended, I know), and also listen below:

Wait, What? Ep. 98: Gorilla With An Eyepatch

And, as always, thank you for listening!

Wait, What? Ep. 83: As Good As A Feast

Hoo boy.  Did not think I was going to make this particular deadline.  I won't bore you with the blah-blah-blahs, but let's just say: papa needs a new microphone and he needs one bad.  I apologize in advance for all the not-especially-discreet cracking and popping going on at various points in the background of this.  We are maybe two weeks away from a solution to both it and the mild echo chamber effect that's afflicted us ever since Graeme managed to transcend this corporeal realm.

Buttttttttt, anywayyyyyyy... Gotta keep this short and snappy so lemme just say this:  Wait, What? Ep. 83 is two hours and twenty-seven minutes long, and Graeme and I do not spend all that time trying to remember if the boss at the end of Crazy Climber was a gorilla or not!

No.  Instead, we do our best to cover a lot of lost ground by jawing about Iron Muslim and Zombies vs. Fanboys from Boom Comics, Kirby: Genesis, the current state of comics and the comics internet including Chris Roberson quitting DC and David Brothers' amazing article over at Comics Alliance, Before Watchmen, Grant Morrison, Brian Bendis and Avengers Assemble #2, as well as the Oral History of the Avengers.

Also?  The eighth issues of Wonder Woman Justice League, OMAC, and Batman, Casanova #3, The Shadow #1, The Boys by Garth Ennis and Darick Robertson, Alabaster Wolves, Saga #2, Archie Meets KISS, Prophet #24, more issues of Glamourpuss, and much, much more.

This show was pretty late making its way to iTunes, but if it's not there yet, it will be there soon.  But even so!  You can also listen to it here and now if you would prefer.  Behold:

Wait, What? Ep. 83: As Good As A Feast

As always, thanks for your patience.  I gotta go jump through hoops for the next ten hours or so, but we'll have more for you next week--and, of course, thank you for listening!

Hibbs catches up, sort of -- 4/18's books

Happy 4/20! OK, getting much closer to being "on time", right there under the jump!

AVENGERS VS X-MEN #2: A jarring tonal shift comes this issue as Jason Aaron handles the scripting. It's sort of on par with the change of George Perez to Ron Lim on Infinity Gauntlet, because the voices couldn't be more different. I *liked* what Aaron's got on the page here, but man that's three issues in a row now with no consistency whatsoever between them, and the round robin of writers continues through the series (and art changes with #5, as well) I'm finding this jarring.

I'm also not following a specific plot point, and that's how is Phoenix "coming" in outer space, but also already possessing Hope?

Again, this book isn't for me, really, but I thought this issue was at least OK

BATMAN #8: This here is the first $3.99 issue, and I was a little concerned it would cause a jump off, but people seem to be enjoying the Owls storyline enough to keep supporting it. Again, we'll see what happens when the first Bat-line crossover happens next month -- it seems to me that most of the tie-ins are going to read very similarly, though: owls attack, fight owls. This arc has had a bunch of bizarre "power fluctuation", though -- you'll remember how it opened with Bats kicking the ass of dozens of traditional bat villains, at once. THEN, a single Owl curbstomped Bats about as hard as he's ever been hit. And NOW, Bruce is fighting off dozens of Owls at once, showing again how butch he is. I'd finding this awkward, at best.

The backup story was largely the epitome of "unneeded back up", as it just showed and elongated a moment that we'd seen just minutes before. Boo!

I'm liking the book, overall, but there's something a little off about this whole thing that I'm not figuring out yet. I still thought it was a very low GOOD.

PROPHET #24: Ugh, now THIS is comics! Man, I don't even know what this bit has to do with anything in the first three issues (same character, wholly different scenario), but I also don't care, because it's such fun science fiction, AND we get some wonderful artwork from Farel Dalrymple. I think I've said this before, but this reminds me of nothing less than HEAVY METAL from the 1970s, amazingly inventive and lavishly illustrated science fiction that may or may not make a ton of sense, but who cares because the passion just drips off it. I think this is truly EXCELLENT work.

RESET #1: Peter Bagge returns with something new, and while his cartooning is as good as ever, I had two kind of overwhelming problems with this. First is that the setup is just too thin -- we understand the protagonist is someone who is at least somewhat famous, who did some unspecified awful thing, but there are no details about any of that given here, and so it makes relating to the underlying science fiction premise (that there's a machine that can allow you to relive your life, and make different decisions, but it has to always start from one specific point) just too difficult. We neither know where the protagonist came from, nor where he is trying to go, so taking any kind of suspense or anticipation is rendered virtually impossible.

My second problem is that I think that Bagge has grown into an increasingly "safe" cartoonist as the years have gone by -- not from his underlying style, but from the range and direction of his work. There's nothing "edgy" about his work any longer, it feels predictable and almost staid. Safe.

This work is OK, at best.

SHADOW #1: I was a little surprised how much I liked this. Well, maybe not, because it's Garth -- but there's almost no Ennis-isms here (other than whatever is naturally baked into the character and supporting cast), just a great straight-forward, historically-appropriate period-piece version of the best of the character. If I had one "problem" its that Dynamite really could do itself a favor and instead of spending the coin to get four different unique comics stylists doing covers, they should spend at least that much attention on the interior art. Aaron Campbell is in no way a poor artist, but it's hard to not suffer in comparison to Alex Ross, Chaykin, Jae Lee and John Cassaday. Despite that, I thought this was swell comics, indeed, and thought it was VERY GOOD.

SUPERGIRL #8: I'm only pointing this out because George Perez is suddenly drawing a pair of issues of this book, and I thought this was a very solid little comic that your eye might have wandered away from. Here's a place to wander back for an issue or two -- I thought this was GOOD.

WONDER WOMAN #8: I've said before, ad infinitum, I so don't care for mythological supporting casts, and, so, overall while I've been liking this arc OK, it's really not for me. I still largely feel that way about this issue, but I'd be a big ol' meanie if I didn't observe just how much I liked Cliff Chiang's "redesign" of Hades and the afterlife -- that's some genuinely creepy and affecting stuff. GOOD.

That's it for me for today, as always: what did YOU think?

-B

Wait, What? Ep. 80: Bats and Birds

Apologies to those of you already pestered with this image on Twitter:  I thought it was worth a re-use, in no small part because I must once again plead mentis mortis (I have no doubt I'm handling this dead language so poorly, a charge of necrophilia could well be leveled), thanks to how late it is that I'm composing this and where I'm at for a variety of reasons that will probably become clear once you hear Wait, What? 81 next week.  (Hint: it's a terrifying topic Graeme and I have tackled before.)

But enough of that for now, there's a podcast to be had!  Wait, What? Ep. 80, in fact, a done-in-one of approximately two hours and twenty-five minutes in length.  Yes, you all know I can be pretty wishy-washy (I prefer the verb "to waffle," for obvious reasons) and Graeme and I both thought there were a lot of great and compelling arguments made for keeping this in one.  I do appreciate the minority views, however, and wish I could figure out a way to appease both parties (or offer some consolation for the two part crowd) .  Hopefully, I'll figure something out.

Yes, so--a done-in-one, with the first forty minutes or so being the mighty Graeme McMillan and I talking the reception to the John Carter movie, the lack of interesting Wondercon news, shelling pistachios, costume design, and conspiracy theories about bad movies.

Then, once it becomes obvious, we should maybe start in on the comics and not worry about waiting for a break, we really hit the gas, and start in on recently read comics, including The Wasteland Omnibus, reading The Flash and writing for the trades, Justice League #7 and the Shazam! back-up, Secret Avengers: The Children's Crusade, Avengers X-Sanction #4, Wolverine #303, Dominique LeVeau Voodoo Queen, Wonder Woman #7, Astonishing X-Men and Wolverine and The X-Men, and a heckuva lot more.

You interested?  Oh, come on!  All the cool kids are doing it!  Look on iTunes: iTunes is doing it!  Look right here at this entry, just below!  This entry is doing it!  Don't you want to try it?  Aw, come on!  It'll be cool:

Wait, What? Ep. 80: Bats and Birds

(See, I warned you--admittedly in debased Latin--about how braindead I was!  Nonetheless, I promise to do better next time.  And, as always, thank you for listening!)

Wait, What? Ep. 69: First In Twelve

It's 2012 and it's time for Wait, What? Ep. 69, the podcast that's not nearly as good at replying in its comment threads as it probably should be!

Graeme and I decided to do this all in one since the majority of the response we got were either indifferent to the process or preferred the longer podcasts that allow our tendencies to ramble to eventually get to some kind of point. Do you disagree? Prefer two one+ hour 'casts to one two+ hour one? Want them even shorter? Wouldn't mind them even longer? Let us know your thoughts either in the comments thread here or over at waitwhatpodcast AT gmail.com.

And while you're doing so, check out Episode 69, in which the charming Mr. McMillan and the chatty Mr. McMe discuss Christmas presents, ethical dilemmas, Daredevil #7, The first part of Batman: Leviathan Strikes, the fourth issues of Justice League, Wonder Woman, and Batman #4, Tales Designed to Thrizzle, Pope Hats by Ethan Rilly, The Annotated Sandman, and the insanity that is Crying Freeman. It's all in good fun, and almost no one gets hurt!

Choosy mothers may have chosen iTunes, but mothers of invention are more than welcome to let their freak flag unfurl and listen to us below:

Wait, What? Ep. 69: First In Twelve

As ever, we  hope you enjoy and thank you for listening!

"Now, Tanned, Rested, Ready And Fully Equipped With Brazilians..." Comics! Sometimes They Are Kind of New(ish)!

A couple of posts down from this rubbish there is a quite extraordinary thing occurring. People are discussing Digital comics and no one has been killed! It's a Christmas miracle, by Jove!

Why not go have a looksee, this rot isn't going anywhere. I read these comics. There was no force on earth strong enough to stop me.

BATWOMAN #3 By J.H. Williams III(a), J.H. Williams III/W. Haden Blackman(w),Dave Stewart(c) and Todd Klein(l) (DC Comics, $2.99)

It’s perfectly fine story wise but I can’t lie I probably wouldn't be reading it were it not for J H Williams III’s stellar performance on every page. I guess having art like this on something so meat and taters might seem a little like a bit of a waste, like having Einstein fix your toaster, but there’s two things I bear in mind when I read BATWOMAN: Thing the first is that J H Williams III is co-writing it so it’s not as if he’s been hoodwinked into this and so if he’s happy doing this and it looks this good I’m not going to carp and pule. It’s preferable to him wasting himself illustrating some other guy’s awesome movie-pitch-cum-graphic-novel about an ex-alcoholic shark that goes back in time to try and kill Pia Zadora’s chiropodist. In space. Thing the second is that there’s just something great about seeing someone talented do that talented thing even if you aren't that enamoured of the arena in which they express themselves. Boxing? No. Muhammad Ali? Oh, yes.

Also it’s totally neaty keen-o that the sapphism of the lead just results in exactly the same scenes between partners we used to get when everyone, everywhere was straight.  It’s an important lesson more people should heed: what you choose to do with your genitals doesn't make you any more interesting as a human being. Really, trust me on this. Particularly if you are considering telling me about what you like to do with your genitals. You would be amazed how many people think telling me about what they get up to with their genitals is an acceptable substitute for a personality. Even though it hardly keeps me awake at night with its narrative twists and turns Batwoman certainly amuses my eyes to the extent that I would call it VERY GOOD!

WONDER WOMAN #3 By Cliff Chiang(a), Brian Azzarello(w), Matthew Wilson(c) and Jared K. Fletcher(l) (DC Comics, $2.99)

Well, I guess we can all agree that among all Wonder Woman’s many powers the greatest of these must be her Divine Unflappability. I know if my Mother was standing there in public talking about her needs and how Zeus answered them by breaking upon her shores in  a great salty foam of satisfaction I’d be blushing like my cheeks were slapped and making a high keening noise like a fox with its paw in a trap. Not Wondy, she just goes and belts some husky lass and burns some corpses. I am greatly enjoying Azzarello’s writing here as it’s brisk, eventful and he’s reigning in his word games to good effect. Cliff Chiang is dreamy as well. Truth to tell he makes it such a smooth read I probably don’t actually appreciate the level of skill he’s applying. Also, while I did make mock of Hera’s randy reminiscence it was more in light of the effect on Wondy than the actual scene which is handled with taste and subtlety, which I guess goes to show that mature matters can be depicted without making your brain burn with shame for the people involved, y’know, if approached maturely. Who knew a Wonder Woman comic could be VERY GOOD!?

O.M.A.C #3 By Keith Giffen & Dan Didio (a/w), Scott Koblish(i), Hi-Fi(c) and Travis Lanham(l) (DC Comics, $2.99)

Okay, it’s true that Kevin Cho’s only personality trait is “befuddled”, his girlfriend is as accurate a portrait of 21^st Century womanhood as Dame Barbara Cartland (she spent “all morning cooking” in 2011? Really? I rather think not and I’m hardly Franky Feminist), there’s a hell of a lot more momentum than meaning and it feels almost indecent to be complementing Dan Didio on anything except turning a panicked line-wide shell game into a massive (length of term to be decided) success. But having said all that…having said all that…you get to see Keith Giffen enjoying himself in the only legal and publicly permissible manner he still has available, the microwave intensity of Hi-Fi’s colours still burns with the flare of The Future (so much so that I suspect that in 2024 there will be a sudden outbreak of people collapsing with great tumours blossoming from their eyesockets like fatal clouds. Every one of whom will be found to have read OMAC.), Max Lord not only has that Kirby Dapper Dan parting but he also smokes, there’s a character called Little Knipper and there is a man with Mind Powers who appears to have a salmon fillet draped over his head. Bearing all that in mind I think you have little option than to agree that it is game, set and match to OMAC, which by the way is still VERY GOOD!

AVENGERS 1959 #3 By Mister Howard Victor Chaykin (w/a), Jesus Arbutov(c) and Jared K. Fletcher(l) (Marvel Comics, $2.99)

Howard Victor Chaykin must have been told the sales figures for this series when he was halfway through the issue because he suddenly just seems to say "Aw, nertz to youse bums! Allayez!" and starts writing the story he obviously wanted to write in the first place. Since this story is basically Nick Fury in a Dr. No-era Bond Flick with a sly sideways dig at Howard Victor Chaykin's own CHALLENGERS OF THE UNKNOWN SERIES and is peppered with salty humour and ridiculously entertaining action I know I'm okay with that. Yet another issue of intriguing skullduggery set in a convincing simulacra of the '50s and containing all the man-tastic magic of the Master Of The Mai Tai his own bad self, Mister Howard Victor Chaykin. Who else could quote both Papa Hemingway and Dezi Arnaz, from I love Lucy, on the same page? Exactly! No, no one is buying it but that doesn't stop it being VERY GOOD!

MUDMAN #1 By Paul Grist(w/a) and Bill Crabtree(c) (Image Comics, $3.50)

Now this? This is some fine comics. Mister Paul Grist bringing it big style. He’s got a thing he does and he’s doing that thing here which is good because it’s a good thing Mister Paul Grist does. Alex Toth once wrote a blurb commending Paul Grist’s work. Alex Toth. Grist’s clearly influenced by Toth at the very least to the extent that his pages are very design orientated and the contents of said pages contain the minimal amount of ink in order to achieve the maximal amount of information. Grist mixes in a good dose of Kirby chunkiness into his Toth which makes the result a lot lighter and boppier than the sometimes airless Toth and of course the Toth grounds it more in reality than Kirby’s work could manage. That could all be horseshit as I have no idea what I’m on about but I am pretty sure Grist is like Toth in at least one respect: all the thinking’s been done before he puts the first line on the page. And every page here is a joy either as a pure comic experience or as an example of pure comic craft.

Mudman is a new series so anyone intimidated by the continuity of JACK STAFF (which included nods to continuity in old English comics even I’ve barely any acquaintance with. Lion? Victor? You could totally enjoy JACK STAFF without getting any of it BTW, it’s right gradley, tha knows. This interruption is too long to go in brackets but I’m sure no one will notice) should put their fears to one side. It’s a totally new start given the impression of some kind of back-story weight thanks to Grist’s penchant for temporal narrative zig zagging. It’s fun, funny and the execution is funnybooks in excelsis. If you aren’t reading MUDMAN you must be mad, man! (in my imagination we all clubbed together and promised Brian Hibbs that we’d get him a SavCrit cover blurb for Christmas. That’s my attempt. Cheers!) So, yeah, MUDMAN#1 is VERY GOOD!

SCALPED #54 By R.M. Guera(a), Jason Aaron(w), Giulia Brusco(c) and Sal Cipriano(l) (Vertigo/DC Comics, $2.99)

Although this series barely manages to avoid crumpling under the sheer weight of its genre clichés and the author’s ‘70s movie memories it remains a decently entertaining read. Some of this is due to the author who manages to pull the rug out from under you often enough that you’re never entirely complacent. Most of it is the storytelling which, yes, I guess Jason Aaron has a hand in but let’s face facts R.M. Guera’s got his whole arm in it up to his elbow. R. M. Guera is astonishing. I won’t go on about it but let’s just say that, for example, R. M. Guera knows that there’s a difference between visually basing one of your characters on Warren Oates and straight up tracing pictures of Warren Oates. The former is an act of skill and the latter lazy pish. R. M. Guera doesn't do lazy pish. When SCALPED ends with issue 60 I look forward to seeing genre comics take full advantage of Guera’s inventive and invigorating skills by assigning him to a Wolverine comic. SCALPED is VERY GOOD! but R.M. Guera is EXCELLENT! And I don’t tell him that enough so I did it here in front of y’all because I am not ashamed of my love. My love is beautiful!

THE GOON #36 By Eric Powell(w/a) and Dave Stewart(c) (Dark Horse, $3.50)

Hey, I laughed a couple of times, longest and hardest at the vagina joke. Oh, yes that’s the level we’re operating on with this one. And that’s okay. Like I said I laughed a couple of times at the story inside but I laughed most at the interview with Roxi DLite where the bounteous burlesque babe is at great pains to stress that burlesque isn't “just stripping in vintage lingerie”. It certainly isn’t! And those men in the front row with their hands kneading their groins like they’re digging for gold are “applauding”. Hey, whatever you want to tell yourself, people. Whatever it takes. A word of advice to the erotically adventurous: before you go to town on the centrespread of Roxi Dlite – take out the staples first. Casualty Departments are busy enough as it is, guys.

THE INFINITE VACATION #3 By Christian Ward(a/w) and Nick Spencer(w) with design stuff by Kendall Bruns and Tim Daniels (Image, $3.50)

I’m not Sally Scientist but reading the exposition in this I can’t help thinking that somewhere along the way someone confused science with semantics. Still, even on that basis it’s still quite fun, I mean I’m all for messing about with words, so, okay. I’m less keen on the sudden immersion in full on sordid torture of the sensationalistic stripe. I mean, really INFINITE VACATION #3, you spend all that time and skill using words, pictures and even design in a pretty entertaining use of the comics form and then just expect me to be slack jawed with awe because you've seen Hostel. Nope, you could have been something, INFINITE VACATION #3 but you let us all down with your antics, and you let down no one more than yourself. Go to your room and think about how you are just OKAY!

THE MIGHTY THOR #5 By Olivier Coipel/Khoi Pham(a), Matt Fraction(w), Laura Martin(c) and Joe Sabino(l) (Marvel Comics, $3.99)

This comic contains a preview of NEW AVENGERS. This is important because you may wonder why this comic which is usually EH! Is now AWFUL! despite it being exactly the same level of vacuous failure as every previous issue. It’s that NEW AVENGERS effect in full effect! I could go through this comic and tell you why it is so dispiriting an experience but no one cares least of all, for all their tiresome whining, the victimised creators so just take my word for it and save yourself $3.99 because MIGHTY THOR#5 is AWFUL!

Despite being broken and bad MIGHTY THOR did remind me of something on TV. Do you have those Adopt-A-Sad-Donkey commercials over there? Because MIGHTY THOR and NEW AVENGERS seem to be indicating that Comics are headed in that direction. So about March or so next year you can expect your episode of Chowder  to be interrupted by footage of some guy in a fluffy jumper strolling soulfully around a Mall while John Hurt’s smoky tones cough up the following:

“This is “Dave”. “Dave” wants nice things but tragically the world won’t just throw them at him. Times are hard for everyone and “Dave” has to earn a living. “Dave used to be able to write. You may fondly remember some of the things he wrote. “Dave” is quite happy to trade on this nostalgic fondness if you’ll just send him some money. Sadly “Dave” is old now, in his thirties, and his best days are behind him. If enough of you pledge just $3.99 a month “Dave” will receive the sales figures he so desperately needs in order to feel validated, sales figures that will result in a contract enabling him to eat brand name burgers and fart around flea markets with other needy creators looking for Female Prison films on Betamax while taking pictures of each other on Hi-tech gadgets. For just $3.99 a month “Dave” will send you a Tweet at least once a week. When he has a new comic out “Dave” will Tweet you hourly. When “Dave’s” comic gets optioned it may even require the intervention of a Law Enforcement Agency in order to stop “Dave” Tweeting you. If you pledge $5.99 a month “Dave” will reveal unfortunate intimate facts about himself and which Sham 69 b-side he was listening to when he wrote his grocery list. The comic? Oh, you don’t need to read the comic. The comic will be awful. This isn't the ‘70s, granddad, the actual comic isn't important. What is important is that “Dave” mentions all your favourite TV Shows in interviews and explains things really s-l-ow-l-y to you in the form of references to children's fantasy films from the '70s and so he must Love you and, if you send him $3.99 a month, “Dave” will ensure it will be like having the Best Friend in the World and all his successes will be your successes and all his money will be your money. So this Christmas give “Dave” the gift he needs most – money. And also unquestioning loyalty.”

And like the concept of “modesty” – I’m GONE!

Have a dandy weekend, all!

Wait, What? Ep. 64.1: Can Stop, Will Stop.

Oh, Thanksgiving weekend! What a boon you are to some, and a curse to others. I know I am extra-happy with the time off from work, but it also means Graeme and I won't be recording this week.

And it also means there didn't seem to be much point to breaking this episode in half since so many will be away from their computers on Thursday and instead dealing with the complex mash of family, friends and strangers. (I'll spare you details about my upcoming Thanksgiving but I realize I'm being way more morose about it than everybody else.)

The point is, we are giving you a big ol' 110 minute Waitstravaganza, with Graeme and I talking Community and Parks and Recreation; fights on Twitter (and more specifically Graeme's recent dust-up there); Avengers #19 and the brilliance of Daniel Acuna (sorry, I don't know how to put that little tilde over the n there), the mini-comics Cindy & Biscuit by Dan White, Sabertooth Vampire by Mark Russell, and The End of the Fucking World by Charles Forsman.

Think that's everything? Nope! We also talk up Mud Man by Paul Grist; Batman and Robin; Wonder Woman #3; Jim Shooter; fractal comedy; and much, much, much, much more. Our hope is it will give you something to listen to while standing in line for Black Friday events! (Or having to work the night before to prep for them!) Or, you know, as a way to cope with the lack of a holiday that combines bird meat and endless televised sports.

Wait, What? Ep. 64 is a thing you can find on iTunes. But, also! It is here (though why our plug-in player doesn't really seem to work any more, I 'm a little baffled by) and we invite you to share in the holiday cheer, cranberry sauce optional:

Wait, What? Ep. 64.1: Can Stop, Will Stop

We hope you have a wonderful holiday weekend and, as always, thanks for listening!

"But first, call your girlfriend..." Comics! Sometimes they are Nu!

Um, no show without Punch, right? Well, how to follow all that, eh? All the Nu-DC reviewed and rated by some of the finest minds to have been damaged by comics at an early age! How about by saying exactly the same things about less comics but more leadenly, with more words and a smattering of shit jokes. Those being bad jokes as opposed to jokes about shit. Business as usual then!

WONDER WOMAN #1 By Cliff Chiang (a), Brian Azzarello (w), Matthew Wilson (c) and Jared K. Fletcher (l) (DC Comics, $2.99)

For someone as pickled in cape comics as I am I sure do have a deficiency in the area of Wonder Woman comics. In fact I think I only own those Wonder Woman issues John Byrne did. I own them but I haven’t read them. I think I was drunk on E-Bay or something. Anyway I don’t really have a clear idea of Wonder Woman but luckily neither does DC by all accounts (ho ho ho) so this blank slate beginning was perfect for me. After reading it I still have no idea about Wonder Woman because it’s not really about Wonder Woman after all or it is but it’s also about everybody else in it, kind of an ensemble piece.

I certainly wouldn't have gone for Azzarello’s idea of sticking Wonder Woman into GREEK STREET as my first choice but it turns out I’d be wrong because I really, really enjoyed this one. It’s creepy, eventful and surprisingly unsettling all in all and Cliff Chiang’s art is just the dreamiest. Cliff Chiang – reach out and touch him! I look forward to this characterisation of Wonder Woman being carried across to the JL where she will just straight gut Darkseid while he’s bloviating leading to a big Super-sigh from Supes and 21 pages of the JL trying not catch Wonder Woman’s eye while she stands there daring any of them to say anything. Because consistency of characterisation across the line is certainly what I expect from the Big 2! In this comic WONDER WOMAN was VERY GOOD!

MEN OF WAR #1 Tom Derenick, Phil Winslade (a),  Ivan Brandon, Jonathan Vankin (w), Matt Wilson, Thomas Ch (c) and Rob Leigh (l) (DC Comics, $3.99) I didn't ask for this one. I guess my LCS sent it because I chunter on about old war comics all the time. Watch: What’s this Men of War starring Frank Rock’s grandson business? What’s all that about? Rock stories appear in Our Army At War or Sgt Rock comics! Men of War is Gravedigger’s book! Why didn't they go with Gravedigger? He’s African-American so they could have picked up some of that sweet media heat.

This one looks like one of the rush-jobs because it isn't very interesting at all despite the revelation that apparently in the US Armed Forces on occasion you will be taken into a room where you will be told how much everyone you have ever met really likes you and then they will ask after your Mother. If you are a Captain you get a back rub and ice cream. There was a terrible moment when the issue opened with “Something warm on my face…wet…” but I checked and Judd Winick hadn't written it so I carried on. There’s some weird business with super heroes that lacks clarity, I’m guessing nu-Rock will have a chip on his shoulder about capes. I’m guessing this since the mission goes big-time number ten SNAFU as soon as the cape turns up. I’m thinking someone wants to plan their Ops a bit more thoroughly than sending in the ground boys and then just have a cape jizz about blowing stuff up and crashing into everything willy nilly. I’m no Patton but a bit of planning might help.

 "Exciting stuff, there!"

There’s quite a lot of action in this but it isn’t terribly interestingly delivered, which is a shame because that means most of the issue isn’t terribly interesting. C’mon, Tom Derenick, I know it can’t be easy making this stuff look exciting but, I don’t know if you've heard, there ain’t nothing easy in Easy Company! There’s a back-up that is exactly like some early ‘60s Robert Kanigher/Irv Novick short about fighting men and how they are men who are fighting. Which was okay back then but I checked with a passing young person and apparently it is now 2011, so that’s not so good. There’s the usual lovely gangly scratchiness from Phil Winslade on this bit so that’s nice. But his presence suggests someone put this comic together in a rush because although Phil Winslade deserves better he appears to be DC’s first choice for pinch-hitting on non-cape comics. Overall then MEN OF WAR #1 is kind of like stumbling into a pit of confusion laced with punji sticks carved from clichés. Proving once again that War is EH!

ACTION COMICS #1 By Rags Morales/Rick Bryant (a), Grant Morrison (w), Brad Anderson (c) and Patrick Brosseau (l) (DC Comics, $3.99)

Beginning a bold new era in Superman comics! An era of Superman comics I actually want to read! That’s an exciting notion right there, DC Comics; Superman comics people might enjoy. Judging from this issue this bold experiment is working out okay. This is pretty much the kind of capey first issue Grant Morrison can probably spuff out in his sleep by now. It starts at full pelt and just keeps barrelling along with the odd handful of exposition and foreshadowing thrown at the eager reader’s face as it whistles past. Nicely done. Rags Morales was obviously a bit time constrained but for the most part his art is pretty lovely. Other parts are just jarring, like when I was enjoying Lex Luthor’s regal new nose only to turn the page to find he had somehow turned into a beatific bald child, later on his nu-nose was back, but, c’mon. let’s try and keep on-model here, guys.  I really enjoyed Lex Luthor in this, he was given some kind of reasonable motivation for his Super-hate and did that suave thing where he basically does what they paid him for without even breaking a sweat (or registering the colossal property damage and human injuries involved) and then just saunters off. Stylish!

"Hey, anyone seen a berk? Superman needs to talk to a berk!"

Superman intimidating that there fellow into a confession? Have to say it didn't bother me that much. The dude he drops is clearly (almost comically so) established to have done Wrong. So, it’s not even a Left/Right wing thing either. He’s a Bad, Bad Man!  Of course what Superman does isn't super-nice but then he is basically a power fantasy after all. And, yeah, big old woolly minded Liberals like me have them too. But a part of the power fantasy of Superman is: He’s Right So It’s Okay. Anyway wasn't all this sorted around 1986 with that book WHATCHAMAFLIP where it showed if capes existed then they’d be co-opted by The Man, hunted as criminals, retire quietly or be big, blue men who liked to feel it swing in the wind? As another book that year said “We have always been criminals, Clark.” It’s just one of those things you agree not to notice when you pick up a cape book, I think. C’mon, I noted at least two people had had their head pushed through a wall/table by Superman. I’m pretty sure that’s likely to be fatal. But I bet it wasn't, because, y’know, it’s…Superman! Suspension of disbelief, people, have some on you at all times! And so Superman, and thus, ACTION COMICS #1, is VERY GOOD!

DEMON KNIGHTS #1 By Diogenes Neves/Oclair Albert (a), Paul Cornell (w), Marcelo Maiolo (c) and Jared K. Fletcher (l). The Demon created by JACK KIRBY. (See Marvel, who did that hurt? Eh?!) (DC Comics. $2.99)

I don’t know about this one, I’d guess it was slapped together for the Nu-push at short notice. It’s got concepts and ideas but it all just seems a bit bunged out, a bit “Table Four are getting up to leave! Soup now, Chef!” While it just never really gelled for me it did have appealing elements such as the mix of characters and a working sense of humour. Sadly Cornell drops a bollock by making Merlin practically characterless. As anyone who has seen EXCALIBUR will attest Merlin must always evoke Nicol Williamson’s fantastic I-have-decided-I-am-in-a-different-film-to-everyone-else performance, otherwise your Merlin just ain't happening, pal. Ignoring that but given the very real problems I had with the comic I can’t in all conscience give it better than EH! But since I sense some potential I’m hoping it’ll at least get to GOOD! But try to remember that not everyone is as patient and lovely as me, DC!

"It is the DOOM of Marvel that they refuse to credit Jack Kirby. Hmmm!"

SWAMP THING #1 By Yanick Paquette (a), Scott Snyder (w), Nathan Fairbairn (c) and John J. Hill (l) (DC Comics, $2.99)

It’s lucky I’m not in a Scott Snyder comic or I’d be discomforting Superman with that time my Dad said unfortunate things about immigrants or how this whole dead birds and fish thing is a bit like my Dad saying how people park in front of your house and, yeah, you don’t own the bit outside your front window but, really now, is it too much to ask for just a little common decency here, Superman? But I’m not in it, Alec Holland is. Interestingly despite having returned magically from the dead after a period of some years Alec Holland is still way more employable than me. He’s on his second job since he just popped up a few weeks ago and he’s made the transition from botanical boffin to horny handed builder without missing a step. Versatility is the key in times of recession, jobseekers! Having been dead and then kind-of-maybe-not-sure-been Swamp Thing has left him with the super power of being able to tell which planks are spoiled by rot via touching and staring; I guess that swung the interview despite the Death Gap Years on his C.V. and total lack of experience. I liked that bit, the bit where we get a crash course on rot and also the bit about the anti-inflammatory properties of cabbage leaves. I hear they saved the bit about the effects of coriander on erectile dysfunction for another comic.

"Oh hush now and dance with me you fool!" I also enjoyed the bit about the slow-motion savagery of The Green. Mind you, that sounded familiar; is that from He Who Cannot Be Named’s run? Speaking of  which there are cute shout outs to previous Swamp Thing comics (the logo on the diggers, Holland’s pass code, the name of the motel, etc) but the most obvious throwback is the style, which is very like The Nameless One’s early issues. Not as good, mind you, but similar. The art’s nice as well. I don’t envy Paquette having to draw all that…real stuff but he does it well displaying a commendable range. I heard that he had to redraw some of it as well to incorporate Superman’s new, um, look so kudos for the extra effort there. Hopefully it’ll get a bit smoother now the set-up is over, maybe Swamp Thing will be on more than one page and we’ll hear less Dad wisdom but, yeah, it’s a little bit talky and it’s a little bit creepy (like me, huh! Well, that's nice.) I…guess…it…was…OKAY!

FRANKENSTEIN AGENT OF S.H.A.D.E #1 By Albert Ponticelli (a), Jeff Lemire (w), Jose Villarrubia (c) and Pat Brosseau (l) (DC Comics, $2.99)

I’m okay about Jeff Lemire, I enjoyed that book he did about the sad kid and the grumpy ex hockey player and then that series he does about the sad kid with antlers and the grumpy ex-hockey player after the apocalypse. I thought I’d try this one to see if he could maybe expand his range a bit. Because apparently it’s really laudatory for creators to “go outside their comfort zones”. Which, yeah, it is but only if they avoid moving all their old baggage and furniture in so that in no time at all the place pretty much looks like their old comfort zone. (I’m not talking about Jeff Lemire here, SWEET TOOTH and ESSEX COUNTY are very different, that was a cheap gag earlier so I could cram this next bit in.) Some of these guys who get a rep for “going outside their comfort zone” remind me of a certain tendency we Brits have. This being a tendency to go somewhere exotic and then find the nearest English theme pub and sit in it for two weeks eating Yorkshire puddings and drinking binge while looking at a foreign sky out of the window. Anyway this one’s about a sad monster kid and his team of undead ex-hockey players. No, not really it was just punchline time!

 "Keats was a pussy, Palmer! Larkin, dude! Larkin!"

It is, as has been stated by better people, quite similar to Xombi. You remember Xombi; the fresh and fizzy breakneck ride packed with invention and incident that didn't stint on characterisation and was illustrated by someone who clearly gave a shit about what he was doing. The one that got cancelled after 6 issues. This is a bit like Xombi but, I don’t want to be mean (after all I (spoiler!) liked it just fine), but a bit more pedestrian, a bit more stale. A bit more likely to survive, I guess. Of course it’s got a bit of a hand up since it’s riding the crest of the nu-wave. Did this one sell out? Six months ago would this have sold out? Questions there - show your workings. So there’s an immediate benefit the relaunch has had. Stuff that’s a bit quirky, a bit off-beat has a far likelier chance to survive. That can’t be a bad thing can it? I guess once Lemire gets rid of the stock crazy ideas that float on top of his mind things should get more interesting and the series might actually have a chance to last that long. At the moment though it’s OKAY!

ANIMAL MAN #1 By Travel Foreman/Dan Green (a), Jeff Lemire (w), Lovern Kinzierski (c) and Jared K. Fletcher (l) (DC Comics, $2.99)

This one seems to have been pretty clearly in the can before the call to arms came. I think the tell is just how polished it is. It’s a really tidy little first issue which tells you who everyone is in relation to each other, how Animal Man’s powers work, how he is in a crisis, where he stands in the wider world and demonstrates that whoever’s inking it should really sort that out pronto, because some of it was real gloopy. In fact the execution is almost kind of a bit too efficient for me, almost a bit too TV for me.

"They're...they're in your face!"

Luckily there were some appealing rough spots such as Buddy and Ellen’s interaction (I thought it was pretty “realistic” couple chat action myself. Unless that reflects badly on me in which case it was terrible! Terrible!, I say!) and Travel Foreman’s quirky art which had quite a lot of space in it which worked to make things a bit not unpleasingly discombobulating for this reader at least. I’ll stick around for a bit anyway as it was, on the whole, GOOD! However, if Buddy’s kids start being sad and Buddy turns out to have a past playing hockey, I’m gone, bubba!

OMAC#1 By Keith Giffen/Scott Koblish (a), Dan Didio/Keith Giffen (w), Hi-Fi (c) and Travis Lanham (l) (DC Comics, $2.99)

Step back! It’s an OMAC attack! The Buddha of Budda!budda!budda! is back! OMAC! Created by JACK! Bubblegum bellicosity Kirby style! I believe it only right that there should be a corner of comics that is forever Kirby so this was VERY GOOD! If they actually credit Jack Kirby next time I might see fit to say it’s even better. Naughty, DC.!

And on that bombshell! Have a great weekend, everyone!

Graeme Takes On The New 52. All At Once.

You know, before DC Comics so politely sent me the entire run of the New 52 launch issues, I don't think that I'd ever read an entire month's worth of a superhero universe before. I have to say, it's kind of exhausting. But that doesn't mean that I'm not going to try and run down very quick capsule reviews of all 52 right here, right now, as Fatboy Slim once said many many years ago oh God I am so old. ACTION COMICS #1: In retrospect, maybe my favorite of all 52 books, this one feels like it actually understands how to reboot a concept without overwhelming the reader with information or assuming that they already know everything; Grant Morrison's script has some of his shorthand dialogue, but it's dense and filled with "action" throughout, and this feels like a satisfying chunk of comics that also lays the groundwork for future stories. Very Good.

ALL STAR WESTERN #1: It's heresy amongst the comicsinternet to admit that I'm not a massive fan of Justin Gray and Jimmy Palmiotti's Jonah Hex, but it's never really done a lot for me. That said, this felt solidly Good, setting up the new status quo for the character - and offering enough introduction to the character for new readers - with some really nice art by Moritat. I'm amused by yet another "Gotham is built upon conspiracy and evil" storyline so soon after last month's finale of Batman: Gates of Gotham, though.

ANIMAL MAN #1: Oh, this was so almost good. Jeff Lemire's writing is... good, I think, although I feel like he stumbles on the more domestic side of things here, and I like the subtle repositioning of this series as a horror book. But the art is just not serving the writing well at all; Travel Foreman can be an interesting stylist, but he ruins scenes here, most importantly - and, I think, damningly - the final page, which is robbed of its full impact by some weird staging that basically wastes the top half of the page. Also not helping, the inks by Dan Green (which veer between too heavy and almost weightlessly light) and some very dull, flat colors by Lovern Kindzierski. Eh, then, because of the art.

AQUAMAN #1: Yes, Geoff, I get it: Aquaman isn't a comedy punchline anymore. I would've preferred it if we'd had a chance to decide that for ourselves instead of suffering through the "blogger interview" midway through the book, but overall, this is a pretty Good first issue, setting out its pitch, introducing its characters and having a decent enough hook for the next few issues. That said, if you were reading Brightest Day, you pretty much know what's in here already; this is very much a continuation of what was happening with the character in that book.

BATGIRL #1: I don't know if this was flop sweat or something else, but this just didn't work as well as I'd been expecting it to. Maybe because it's so joyless, something that writer Gail Simone didn't seem to have a problem expressing with the character in Birds of Prey, but there really is something very... rushed and filled and self-important about this issue that made it feel like you were being hurriedly brought up to speed by someone who wanted you to know how serious everything was. World's dumbest cliffhanger, too. Eh.

BATMAN #1: Greg Capullo's art is surprisingly nice - Yes, a little too MacFarlane for my tastes, still, but what can you do? - and Scott Snyder's story is... I don't know. Nice, but somewhat slight, perhaps? I'll be coming back for a second issue, but I think that's more down to goodwill for the creative team than anything having particularly wowed me with this debut. Okay, I guess.

BATMAN AND ROBIN #1: Now this was much more my speed, perhaps because I enjoyed this version of Batman more - One who seems to be dealing with his trauma after X number of years processing survivor guilt as Batman, instead of just burying it - than the one in Batman or Detective (And, really, I can't believe that a linewide reboot didn't result in a slightly more consistent portrayal of Batman. He feels like a different character everytime he appears, like Superman. That doesn't seem like a good thing to me), or perhaps because there was more of an urgency on display here than in Snyder's title. Either way, Good, and a much better "first issue" than the last time Peter Tomasi and Pat Gleason took over the book.

BATMAN: THE DARK KNIGHT #1: Talking of wildly varying characterizations, this book... uh... exists. I don't know what to say about it. If you want a generic Image-style take on Batman, complete with pouty mouths from David Finch and overdone dialogue by Paul Jenkins, this is for you, I guess. I was completely underwhelmed, and laughed out loud as the kids say at the reveal of "One-Face" at the end of the book, especially because he still has half of his face scarred. Awful, but I'm sure it'll have its audience. Oh, and Jaina Hudson is the new Jezebel Jet.

BATWING #1: The first of the "This was much better than I expected" books of the 52, I found myself drawn into this more than I'd thought I would. Maybe it was Judd Winick's take on the character and his secret identity (A cop working outside of the system, because the system is so corrupt), or perhaps it was Ben Oliver's lovely, weirdly hazily dream-like artwork, but this convinced me to try the second issue, which I really wouldn't have thought would've been the case. A low Good, perhaps, but I have to say: This feels much more like a mini-series than an ongoing, already.

BATWOMAN #1: This, however, was a letdown. Not because it wasn't Good, because it was. But I'd been expecting more, spoiled by Greg Rucka's run on Detective. The writing here - by artist JH Williams and co-writer Hayden Blackman - was fine, and hit all the right notes, but didn't surprise me or have the emotional depth that Rucka's had, and the art, while beautiful, also lacked the impact or purpose of the original run. Even though I'll be back for future issues, and even though I enjoyed this, I found myself disappointed nonetheless. That's what I get for having high expectations.

BIRDS OF PREY #1: I'm not sure why, but this felt like it had too much space in it, if that makes any sense. What's here is fine, it's a perfectly Okay comic book, but it feels too empty for some reason, like something is missing. I can't quite put my finger on it, but something isn't quite right, like it's only half of the intended story or something.

BLACKHAWKS #1: I love Mike Costa's Cobra series for IDW, which is why it depressed me so much to realize how much I didn't like this first issue (The art by Graham Nolan and Ken Lashley didn't help; it's overly busy and not quirky enough to make me want to keep paying attention). You can't fault him for throwing the reader in as everything's already happening, but I didn't find any character particularly interesting, mysterious or even distinctive enough to care about, and as a result, the whole thing left me cold. Awful, sadly.

BLUE BEETLE #1: On the podcast, I said this was like the Blue Beetle we had before, but less so. Tony Bedard and Ig Guara make all the right moves, but it lacks the heart or originality to make me want to come back for issue 2. Eh.

CAPTAIN ATOM #1: Hey, everyone who's always wished that there was a Doctor Manhattan solo title spinning out from Watchmen, now you have your dream book. Sadly, it's written by JT Krul - who ruins the goodwill he'd built up from an Okay first issue by ending with a stupid "Is Captain Atom about to die?" cliffhanger (It's his first issue, so I think that question answers itself) - but, on the plus side, the art by Freddie Williams II is very nice indeed. If it gets smarter in future issues, it could end up being worth checking back in with in future, I suspect.

CATWOMAN #1: Oh, man, haven't I said enough about this already? Cheesecakey pandering with a depressingly unsexy tone and annoyingly passive lead character. Awful.

DC UNIVERSE PRESENTS: DEADMAN #1: I swear to God, this is like a black hole in my brain. I have read this book multiple times, and it really refuses to stay in there. Pretty much the definition of Eh for me, although I'll say that Bernard Chang never really gets the credit for his work that he deserves. I'd love to see him paired with less garish colorists sometime.

DEATHSTROKE #1: Fun last-minute twist aside, there's little in this book that appeals: I don't care about the character or the machismo on display, and Joe Bennett has always been hit-or-miss (with an emphasis on the latter) for me. Eh.

DEMON KNIGHTS #1: Punny title aside, Paul Cornell pretty much won me over with the sense of humor on display in this one, much like Jon Rogers did the same in IDW's Dungeons and Dragons book (which this is oddly reminiscent of, it has to be said). Weirdly parochial, but all the better for it. Very Good.

DETECTIVE COMICS #1: Tony "Salvador" Daniel - Has he ever used his middle name before? - aims high and doesn't quite make it, but oh man, can you see him try. There's nothing particularly wrong with this, but there's nothing particularly right, either; it all feels familiar, and more workmanlike than previous attempts. Having Daniel be writer/artist on a Batbook when you also have David Finch doing the same elsewhere in the same franchise feels a bit weird to me, for some reason; I feel like Daniel comes off worse, even though he's better at deadlines and arguably better as a writer, too. Eh, and that's only because I wasn't as appalled by the final page as many were.

THE FLASH #1: After the disappointment of the last Flash run, color me shocked to have enjoyed this as much as I did. Francis Manapul's art is just great - that opening double page splash! The page of Barry in his apartment! - and it turns out that his writing (along with Brian Buccellato) is much faster-paced and more fun than Geoff Johns' on this book. I like the new Barry Allen, and love his relationship to Iris in this new continuity. More of this, please. Very Good.

FRANKENSTEIN, AGENT OF S.H.A.D.E. #1: Another frustratingly "almost" effort from Jeff Lemire - I know where he's going! I just wish he'd made it there! - with equally frustrating art from Alberto Ponticelli, which is just a little too scratchy for its own good (and, like Travel Foreman in Animal Man, a little off in the framing when it really counts). There's a lot to like here, so I'm tempted to put this down to first issue nerves and hope that this book ends up sorting itself out down the line. That said, this is Okay, and I think that the just-finished Xombi played in the same sandbox in a much more entertaining and original way...

THE FURY OF FIRESTORM THE NUCLEAR MEN #1: Of the two Gail Simone books this month, this is the more enjoyable, but it has almost as much crammed into it as Batgirl, leading to a weirdly claustrophobic feeling. That said, I like the new spin on the concept (and the title), and wonder where, exactly, we're going from the end of this issue. Is this going to be DC's second attempt at doing a Hulk book? Yildiray Cinar's art is weirdly reminiscent of Francis Manipul's as far as the inks go, but I'm not sure if it fits here just yet... All in all, an Okay start, but with the potential for either greatness or creative dead-ending within the year.

GREEN ARROW #1: It's as if JT Krul, Dan Jurgens and George Perez set out to create the most generic, boring superhero book imaginable... and succeeded. Crap.

GREEN LANTERN #1: Considering how self-important (and self-conscious) this title had become before the relaunch, it's surprising that Geoff Johns and Doug Mahnke manage to essentially play this first issue for laughs and get away with it. Good, although I found myself wishing that the last page had been held back for a few months, if only because I really enjoyed seeing dick Hal Jordan so much.

GREEN LANTERN CORPS #1: I was always going to be a sucker for this book; John Stewart and Guy Gardner are my favorite Green Lanterns, Peter Tomasi's previous run on the title was something I really enjoyed, and there's no Hal Jordan or Kyle Rayner to harsh my buzz. Sure enough, I really dug this; uberviolent opening aside, I appreciated the "this is where our leads are" intros before the mystery was revealed, and the final page felt weighty and dramatic enough to bring me back next issue. Sure, Fernando Pasarin's art feels like a little bit of a letdown after that Doug Mahnke cover, but it's still pretty great in a "Bryan Hitch but more approachable" way. Very Good, for me.

GREEN LANTERN: NEW GUARDIANS #1: And then there's this. This is just a bit of mess, whether it's the loss of the "some time ago" caption at the opener explaining that the book opens with a flashback, or the failure to really explain who all the different Lantern characters are, it seems sloppy and at odds with the other Lantern books, and Tyler Kirkham's art doesn't necessarily help, either. Awful.

GRIFTER #1: Finally answering that eternal fanboy question "What do you get if you cross Sawyer from Lost with ROM, Space Knight," this is Okay for those of you who enjoy this kind of thing; Nathan Edmonson's script is a bit light on explaining things, but I suspect that's intentional, and CAFU's art seems too polite for the story being told for my tastes. I don't know; there's nothing wrong with it, but there's also nothing that feels especially compelling about it, either, if that makes sense. I think Fringe probably does this kind of thing better, really.

HAWK & DOVE #1: I wanted to like this book so much, and then Rob Liefeld couldn't stop himself reminding me that he's a terrible, terrible artist. Everything happens at crazy angles! People's mouths change size without explanation! Everyone looks permanently in pain because of all the scratches on their bodies! It's a shame, because you get the feeling that Sterling Gates is really trying to work with Liefeld's energy, but he's overwhelmed by it on this issue. Truly, unhappily Awful.

I, VAMPIRE #1: On the plus side, Andrea Sorrentino could pass as fake Jae Lee if the position ever opens up. On the minus side, this is worryingly murky in terms of story (and storytelling; it's not just Joshua Hale Fialkov's script here, the art really does it no favors), and reads like someone's idea of doomed romance a la Twilight, but even more melodramatic. I'm sure there is a massive audience for this, but I found it pretty Eh at best.

JUSTICE LEAGUE #1: Hey, remember when everyone was talking about this book? Well, not much has changed since then. I like it, for what it is; I like dick Hal Jordan, I think there's a reasonably strong mystery introduced and I don't care that the entire team isn't in there despite the cover. But I'd be lying if I said I thought it was more than just Good; there were other books that the relaunch could have led with that seem better suited for all-new readers and a heavy media blitz.

JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK #1: It's not quite Shade Peter Milligan - or, for that matter, Secret Seven Milligan - but there's the potential for getting there with this opener (I really liked the perversity of the Kathy reveal), and Mikel Janin's art is lovely. Slightly underwhelming, I've got a lot of faith that this Good first issue will turn out to be a very good series.

JUSTICE LEAGUE INTERNATIONAL #1: Potentially Green Arrow's main competitor in the "most generic superhero comic" race - And Dan Jurgens is involved with this one, as well! Clearly, this is karma for killing Superman twenty years ago - this just feels like a subpar fill-in to a comic from some point in the 1980s, complete with inexplicable Margaret Thatcher cameo appearance. Considering the potential for a JLI series spinning out of the surprisingly strong Generation Lost mini, this is a tiny bit heartbreaking. Awful.

LEGION LOST #1: The good: Pete Woods' art is just amazing here, really, really great stuff. The bad: Unless you're a Legion fan already, this is likely entirely impenetrable stuff. I love the Legion, and this almost made no sense to me whatsoever. It doesn't help that important things happen off-panel (So, Timber Wolf just picked up the bad guy and no-one tried to stop him?), the characters have no real introduction and just way too much happens to let the reader have any time to make sense of it on first, second or even third reading, because there's not enough space in the book for everything. What it ends up as, then, is a good-looking mess. That's what we call Awful round these here parts.

LEGION OF SUPER-HEROES #1: I've really, really tried to convince myself that New Levitz Legion is just like Old Levitz Legion, but I think this is the issue when I realized I couldn't keep it up. I'm unsure whether it's Levitz or his circumstance, but everything feels so jumpy and fractured that there's no chance - or, it seems, space - to build up the long running soap operatics that I loved the first time around, with everything ending up sacrificed for whatever big storyline that I find myself uninterested in. Eh as much as I wish it were otherwise.

MEN OF WAR #1: Someone, somewhere, found this to be more than some generic "Are you really a man?" cliches wrapped around a superhero mystery, but it wasn't me. Awful, and the back-up strip was even worse.

MISTER TERRIFIC #1: Another book that I really, really wanted to like - Although that's almost entirely down to the original release info containing the hilariously melodramatic line about him fighting "science gone bad!" - and the actual book... kind of lived up to my expectations, perhaps? There's a lot to like here (The new origin, with a time travel mystery replacing the Spectre's telling him "Hey, that white guy? You should rip him off," for example), but it doesn't come together properly, and ends with a cliffhanger that just makes no sense in a first issue ("Is this character acting weird? How would you know! You've just met him. Tune in next month to find out if he is or not!"). But... Again, maybe it's goodwill, but even though this was just Okay, I'm holding out hope for better soon.

NIGHTWING #1: I came to really like Dick Grayson when he was Batman, so why do I find almost everything in his new title feeling like it's a step backwards? Whether it's Dick visiting the circus again, or telling us how good it is to feel like himself, all of it feels more forced and less genuine than it should. Eh, and most of my fondness for the character disappears entirely as he disappears behind a pile of dialogue and sentiment we've heard before.

OMAC #1: If it wasn't for Superboy, this might have been the best surprise of all 52 books. Somehow, Keith Giffen and Dan Didio manage to channel Kirby's sense of fun, if not his sense of originality - This is a reboot of an existing concept, after all - by smooshing together Office Space, the Hulk and the original OMAC to come up with something that feels like it owes as much to Giffen's own Ambush Bug as it does Kirby, and it... weirdly... works. It's very much not for everyone, but I think that's true of the original OMAC as well. It's an odd feeling to think that Dan Didio came up with one of the most individual and arguably the most fun of all of the New 52 books, but there you go. Very Good, and long may it stick around.

RED HOOD AND THE OUTLAWS #1: I think we can also file under "Things I've said too much about," but short version: Not for me even before we hit the "Starfire is an amnesiac bimbo nymphomanic" thing. Crap.

RED LANTERNS #1: If Ed Benes wasn't drawing this book, I have the strangest feeling I would have actually liked it, because Peter Milligan's script - or, more properly, his narration - is weirdly compelling here, and feels oddly subversive to all the Geoff Johnserisms in the scenes surrounding it. If he ends up carrying that further in future issues, I could see this becoming a sleeper hit for the the cool kids who are perfectly okay with women who can twist their bodies to simultaneously show off their butts and their breasts at the same time. Eh, with chances for better later.

RESURRECTION MAN #1: Clearly, it's books dealing with life after death that I have a problem with. Like the Deadman book, this one also barely registers after multiple re-reads. Eh, then.

THE SAVAGE HAWKMAN #1: For everyone who ever thought "What would make Hawkman awesome would be if his armor and wings came out through his pores like Warren Ellis' Iron Man!" then this is apparently the book for you. For the rest of us, this is a book where Hawkman tries to burn his costume for some unknown reason, then gets attacked by it, and then it turns out it's living inside him or something. It really is as bad as it sounds, although Philip Tan's watercolor art is rather nice in places. Awful, though.

STATIC SHOCK #1: It's modern Spider-Man, with the rest of the Milestone universe seemingly playing the supporting cast. It's surprising just how ready I was for that book, without ever realizing it. Good, although I'm already worried about it, now that we know that John Rozum is off the book by #4.

STORMWATCH #1: Like Batgirl, it's possible that this book fails because the writer was far too aware of what they had to do; there's too much empty exposition in this issue, and it's an issue that needed useful exposition. Paul Cornell doesn't quite catch the tone of Warren Ellis' characters, and the disconnect is obvious in a way that isn't obvious; no-one sounds quite right, and everything feels off-kilter as a result. It's a book that simultaneously feels dense and sparse, and Miguel Sepulveda's art, static and heavy, doesn't help with that feeling. A low Eh, and it should be much better.

SUICIDE SQUAD #1: Forget skinny Amanda Waller; this book has way bigger problems. You know, things like an awkward structure (Not helped by multiple artists working on the same issue), a ridiculous set-up and thoroughly flat characterization throughout. Disappointingly Awful.

SUPERBOY #1: I was genuinely surprised by how much this book feels like science-fiction instead of a superhero book, at least in this first issue, and how there's an interesting lack of moral certainty at show just yet (I'm sure that'll change in time). With RB Silva's clean art and Scott Lobdell's strongest script for the relaunch by far, this is Good stuff.

SUPERGIRL #1: This is also surprisingly Good. A complete reboot for the character, and a chance to start from a personality closer to Sterling Gates' work with the character - Probably the character's most recent high point - instead of the wishy-washiness of the origins of the previous version, this issue isn't showy in the slightest, but gets the job done nonetheless.

SUPERMAN #1: Oh, oh, oh. Oh, Superman. I guess, if nothing else, this issue does provide an alternative to Action Comics, mainly in that Action was really good, and this isn't. Where to start? The confusing opening (Is the new Daily Planet built? It would appear so on page 2, but I'm still not sure if that was meant to be a glimpse into the future or not. If it had been rebuilt, would the previous site still have the remains of the old one?), the hilarious scenes of Lois et al discussing journalism ("Print is dying!"), Clark being bitter and mean to Lois, the genuinely horrible examples of Clark's journalism... There is so much wrong with this issue, but primarily I think the underlying structure is the biggest problem: Too much is, again, forced into too small a space, and this time, it's combined with a super brawl that is neither exciting or even interesting, leaving the impression that Superman's life is dull, full of sniping arguments and a ham-fisted idea of how journalism works. It's a mess, and one not saved by Jesus Merino's sterling attempts on art. Awful, and maybe the biggest disappontment of the bunch.

SWAMP THING #1: Talking of wordy, this is another overly-verbose book that could've easily dialed back the exposition to sensible levels and become infinitely better as a result (The whole Superman scene in particular felt unnecessary). That said, like Animal Man, the horror tone works and there's definite potential here. Okay, but greedily, I wanted more.

TEEN TITANS #1: It's a slow start, true, but I'll admit to being sucked in to Scott Lobdell's plan of essentially running one story between this and Superboy - although that final scene in both books has different dialogue and staging in some parts, which seems a completely avoidable mistake to me - and enjoyed this much more than I was expecting from early previews. A high Okay - I still have my issues with Brett Booth's art, I'm sorry - and I might even keep going on this, at least until the entire team is together.

VOODOO #1: You know, deep within this book, there's an interesting idea about an alien invasion happening in plain sight, with the alien as the central character. But getting there in this case means working through a lot of gender politics that's trying to have its cake and eat it at the same time ("Yeah, this is cheesecake, but look, the strippers are real women with class and babysitter problems and shit! But here's some more T&A anyway!"), and... I'm just not interested, ultimately. Awful.

WONDER WOMAN #1: Holy crap, it's the last book. I was beginning to think this would never end. And it's ending on a high note, too; sure, Brian Azzarello's script is sharp and fast-paced (if a little short on explanations, but there's time for those later), but this is entirely Cliff Chiang's show, and he doesn't even vaguely fail to deliver. This is a wonderful looking book - Matt Wilson's colors help considerably - and all the moreso because there's nothing else like it on the DC stands right now. The mythical quality of the story seems on a different scale to all the other New 52 books as well, and the strong individuality of the book makes it feel more like an event... and that's a nice feeling for a Wonder Woman book to have. Very Good, and one of the best books of the line so far.

Now, as the saying goes: What did you think?

Wait, What? Ep. 58.1: The Minor Fall, The Major Lift

[Stellar fixed image courtesy of Ron Salas]

Uh, yes.  I am running sorrowfully late again, so I'll have to kinda dash through all this verbal hubbub and let you know the who's who and the what's what:

Basically? It's Wait, What? Ep. 58.1.  It's a little less than an hour.  In it, Graeme and I not only discuss new DC 52 titles like Blue Beetle, Catwoman, Red Hood & The Outlaws (which I called "Red Hood & The Outsiders" which makes more sense but it a mistake), Batman, and Wonder Woman (and more), but also Chester Brown's Paying for It and initial "sweet jeebis, is it pretty!" pre-review impressions of Craig Thompson's habibi. Oh, and there are lots of shrieks from children outside Graeme's window.  (At least he told me they were outside his window....) We apologize about that.

Anyhoo, the 'cast is in iTunes (probably) and you can listen to it here (definitely):

Wait, What? Ep. 58.1: The Minor Fall, The Major Lift

Part two is around the corner, so there's that.

Oh! And, of course, we hope you enjoy and thank you for listening!