Wait, What? Ep. 126: More of Everything

Because it is Kirby and because it is...my heart.

Okay, tech problems resolved! (You know, as long as you're talking about our recording problems, and not about how everyone has basically been hacked by the government without their consent for years...) So, behind the jump, show notes for our two-hour plus installment of the Show That Cannot Say Die (Without Skype Cutting Out On It)!

Oh, but before you do, make sure you check out posts by Hibbs and Smitty below -- today is our semi-annual Salute to Content!

Anyway, yeah, embarrassing though it is to admit, I think maybe both Graeme and I using Macs now may have exacerbated some of our recording problems with Skype?  Hopefully, that will no longer be an issue as we're trying a whole new workaround (Audio Hijack Pro of our Facetime calls, in case you're interested).  It's not quite perfect -- I've gotta learn how to adjust my microphone levels before we talk and I pray to God that doesn't mean going through Soundcloud because that shit baffles me -- but it's a start, I guess.

So: show notes!  They are short, in part because we were very focused in our chatty way this week and also because I kinda strained my back moving longboxes this weekend and so I'm loathe to spend too much time sitting in this damn uncomfortable desk chair of mine.

0:00-34:57:  Salutations: yup,  it's the dawning of a brand-new era for Wait, What? as we dump Skype and go with a different recording method.  (To be fair, Skype dumped us first.)  We try to be mercifully brief talking tech shit so we can get down to our first minefield of the podcast discussing (again!) the fourth season of Arrested Development.  Wildly over-caffeinated, Jeff wants to talk about critical reception and how a person's individual critical taste develops and (I guess when you get right down to it) how frustrating it is that all the smart sensible people disagree with him.  Graeme, for his part, is having--if not none, then certainly very little--of Jeff's points, for better and worse. 34:57-1:11:05: Finally! Graeme and Jeff talk about Al Ewing's The Fictional Man!  Unfortunately, it's been long enough for Graeme and Jeff (and Jeff is over-caffeinated) that the opening of our discussion should be listened to *for comedic purposes only*.  There's a tremendous amount of initial flailing about how to describe the book, especially when one of the contributors to the podcast has apparently had a stroke and cannot use his big boy words. 1:11:05-1:24:43:  Comics! We do in fact remember what they are.  Jeff read and enjoyed tremendously Faith Erin Hicks' The Adventures of Superhero Girl, and also dug In the Kitchen With Alain Passard by Christophe Blain.  Thanks to a Whatnaut sharing their digital codes for Daredevil #26 and Superior Spider-Man #10, I read those and boy oh boy were they good. 1:24:43-1:38:45:  By contrast, Graeme has read Age of Ultron #9.  If you listen to it, you can hear Jeff rubbing his hands with glee as Graeme shares his feelings about the book, and Graeme also read Avengers Arena #10, which provides a bit of comparison and contrast with the Catwoman/Justice League controversy.  "Bonus:" Jeff's not-very-good Hellblazer story pitch from around the time the Constantine movie came out. 1:38:45-1:39;21: Intermission! 1:39;21-1:43:53: We are back and, in relatively short order, we contemplate Paul Jenkins and his rather spectacular interview at Bleeding Cool  and, to a lesser extent, his open letter at Comic Book Resources. 1:43:53-2:07:01: Oh, but first before we do, here's the first installment of "Graeme Says It Because You Said It" [working title].  Then it's on to a consideration of what we're currently buying from DC, whether Jeff should once again take the crazy train to Boycottville, more from the Jenkins article, and what have you. 2:07:01-end: Graeme didn't much of a chance to talk about comics he's read this week, so Jeff twists his arm and tries to get some quick opinions from him about Green Lantern, Angel and Faith, and a re-run of Pete Tomasi's Batman and Robin. And then we end the podcast! Without it ending us first!

Chances are good the sucker will be up on iTunes by now, but even if so, you are welcome to get at it with the handy link provided below.  As always, we thank you for listening and we shall return next week with more...of everything.

Wait, What? Ep. 126: More of Everything

I have no title, and I must scream! Hibbs' 5/22/13

Thoughts on Twelve Angry Comics from this week, below that jump

AVENGERS #12: I've tried, really I have, but I find Hickman's AVENGERS titles so bloodless and over-plotted that I just can't get into them whatsoever.  Here we are at what would be the "one year mark" for a "normal" comic, at the five months-old mark (and people wonder why Marvel is driving sales now?), and I'm so very very cold to this one and it's sibling title. Only "Spider-Ock teaching those kids how to be selfish" showed any real spark. I find this so very EH.

BOUNCE #1: I don't understand what Joe Kelley is trying to do here? "Speedball, except with swearing and explicit drug use?" That's not so very appealing, and then the first issue ends with an "alternate reality", and I'm trying to figure out what I'm rooting for? Some of the wilder ideas (A superhuman who IS a drug, shadowy conspiracies run by lizard-eaters, etc.) probably work a lot better with the mainstream-like art by David Messina that some of Casey's other co-creators.  I liked it fine, but I'm having a hard time deciphering the actual premise. Call it a very strong OK?

DAREDEVIL #26: this book is moving from strength to strength, and I think that the new enemy is one of the strongest ones that DD has ever faced... but, damn, I can't for the life of my recall his name. Akemi? Ashema? Somewhere in that range. Too bad it wasn't something like "Devildare" or something else easily remembered (Like, dunno, "Bullseye", maybe?), as that would mark a perfect nemesis. Either way, this book is VERY GOOD.

FANTASTIC FOUR #8: There's been something just a few degrees off from this renumbering, that I wish I could put my finger on -- but it's just dying in sales on our racks. Plummmmmet. Which is a damn shame, because this was as near as perfect of a single issue of a superhero comic book that I read this year. Ben Grimm on his one "day of being human", visiting the past of Yancy Street even before his sainted Aunt Petunia, and its just a great great little Done-In-One. VERY GOOD.

FLASH #20: Excited, oddly, about a new "Reverse Flash", but, like much of the Manapul/Buccellato era, it's just not delivering it's potential in my eyes. I really really want to believe, but the fairy is dying right in front of my very eyes. It tries so very very hard, and I desperately want to like it but like a poor marksman, it. keeps, missing. its. target. (KHAAAAAAAAAAANNNN!)

(Christ, I'm a nerd)

I honestly can't generate more than an OK, though I *want* it to be a VG, y'know?

GREEN LANTERN #20: And so ends an era. Really, this deserves an essay of its own, but Geoff deserves some amazing props for turning what was a (lets face it) second string character into a genuine franchise. Some people deride the "rainbow corps" (and, yeah, it probably went a step too far), but at least there are really legitimate differences and motivations and backstories between the various Corps.

I am personally of the mind that Geoff's run ran 3-4 years too long -- I'm not convinced that anything after "Blackest Night" was really particularly good -- but you GOT to give it up to Geoff for what he's accomplished in the run, overall.  I think even moreso because MY expectation is that the franchise of GL is going to crater out without Geoff at the helm... largely I think that the audience was essentially tolerating much of the excess in the line due to perceiving it as a creative vision. We'll see.

This last issue, sadly, wasn't much special -- the villain of this story has been uninteresting, and the final crossover dragged on way too long, with way too much handwaving and gnashing of teeth -- so I'm not inclined to go over an OK, but I do want to make special mention of the "text pieces" scattered throughout the issue which (and this is really straight from Jeff Lester, I am sorry for stealing!) read like nothing more than signatures collected in a high school yearbook, with all of the empty insincere praise that entails -- I'm shocked there's not a "Have A Great Summer!" in there somewhere, honestly -- the nadir probably being Diane Nelson's. I'd be shocked if she could recite the rest of that.

Yeah: "Have A Great Summer!"

GREEN TEAM #1: Here's the good news: We're guaranteed to get more issues of this than from the first series (which had just two issues, after it's debut in "1st Issue Special", both cancelled before they shipped), as this will last AT LEAST until issue #8. It's hard to think that it will get much more beyond that, however, since there wasn't a ton of ACTUAL premise on display in this first one. I get that on paper it's "rich kids buy superpowers", but that only happens for ONE of the "team", and that only on the last page. Has no one heard of "in media res"? Plus? I liked them better as, y'know, little kids. Well, copyright resecured, I guess.

I *love* this description of the cancelled first series: "In the first of the two unpublished adventures, the boys were pitted against giant lobsters and the Russian Navy. In what would have been the third issue, the Green Team face a villain called the Paperhanger who had special wallpaper that grew plants and trees, and who was a dead ringer for Adolf Hitler. They dispatch all menaces, then disappear into history in their private jet." Oh oh, the wacky wacky 70s...

This was highly OK, but needed to be so so much better to escape the event horizon of the current DCU

HALF PAST DANGER #1: Nice try, but another example of "burying the lede" and starting the story long long before the story should actually be started -- "WW2 adventurers FIGHT nazi dinosaurs!" is a great idea, but so much of this comic was walking through woods and sitting in bars and things that were not actually fighting nazis OR dinosaurs. Plus Stephen Mooney's art is just too anatomically awkward in places.  There's virtually no genre serialization that couldn't learn a lot by studying the structure of, say, an episode of Star Trek, and applying that to EACH INDIVIDUAL issue of the comic. Yet another OK on display in this one.

OCCUPY COMICS #1: I think this might be a year too late to do any good, but I liked virtually every page of this polemic of a comic. You could also call this "time capsule comics", because that's likely how this will seem in a decade (sort of like how the 9/11 comics are today), but that doesn't stop this from being a solid little anthology, and (I thought) VERY GOOD. POWERS BUREAU #4: there are times that I think that Bendis has single-handedly done more harm to the very idea of creator-owned comics than another other guy in comics. As a working retailer, I am constrained to point out that this issue is nearly a full month late, and that's after they utterly wasted having a few issues "banked" by shipping the first two bi-weekly and bragging how they were absolutely "guaranteed" to ship on time. And now we're already selling fewer copies than we did of the prior series, *sad trombone noise*

And the shame of it is that the book is very readable again, after a pretty dire patch of thinking it was better than it was -- I thought this issue was solidly GOOD.

UNCANNY X-MEN #6: Speaking of Bendis, he's just killing it here. KILLING.

I don't know why -- maybe because the Claremont DNA makes "chatty" a good move for x-books? I don't know, but this (and "All New") are absolutely "good" Bendis, and I thought this issue, with art by the incomparable Frazer Irving, was VERY GOOD.

YOUNG AVENGERS #5: Really GOOD ending to the first arc, and they're all given a plausible reason to be a team. It's just too bad that "Avengers" comics are as common as STDs on a hooker these days, because the clutter on the shelf (there are FOUR "Avengers" comics just this WEEK) is leaving this one the poor-selling stepchild.

Right, then, that's me -- what did YOU think?

-B

Wait, What? Ep. 116: G-Mo K-Hole

Because it is Hook Jaw, and Because it is My Heart...

Yep, we are back!  Sorry for our absence from the podcasting broadcast waves and of course the Savage Critic site itself.

After the jump--show notes!  But before we get there, I wanted to congratulate House to Astonish for their 100th Episode!  I'm listening to it now, and want to recommend it for people who like what Graeme and I do but would maybe like it if it was done much better?  Congrats to Al & Paul!

Now, then.  Where was I?  Oh, right.

Actually, as long as I'm on the linking-to-not-Wait-What? tip, I should mention I had a great time talking movies with Sean Witzke over at the Factual Opinion's movie podcast, Travis Bickle on the Riviera.  As I said on Twitter, I make a terrible Tucker Stone stand-in, but being able to talk Lincoln, The Seven-Ups, All That Jazz, and John Woo's The Killer (among others) was an opportunity I refused to pass up.  Big thanks to Sean for that, and if there are those brave, masochistic few that haven't had enough of my braying laugh yet, please do check it out.

As for this go-round, check it out:

0:00-6:59: We tried to get our technical problems out of the way at the very beginning (and pass the savings on to you, the listener).  And then it's on to a few minutes of Jeff kibitzing on Graeme's work habits, so it's the best of both worlds--you get to listen in on what Graeme McMillan (the hardest working man on the Internet)

6:59-9:44:  "But, instead, let me read three pages of Hook Jaw…" Who does that sentence turn out well for?  Not someone who has other things to do, that's for sure.  In other words, Hook Jaw is awesome, unless you're Jeff who is trying to procrastinate.

9:44-13:11: Moving on from Hook Jaw, Jeff also picked up issues #3 and #4 of Happy by Grant Morrison and Darick Robertson, and talks about that (although with a lot less evil oil rigger imitations).

13:11-20:04: As long as we're on the G-Mo Train (and let's be honest, when aren't we on the G-Mo Train?), Jeff also read Action Comics #17.  Since Graeme hasn't, the conversation is not especially weighty.  But, hey, for those of you filling out your Wait, What? bingo cards, feel free to fill that in…even if it really should be the card's free space by now.

20:04-21:59: "Where on the Morrison spectrum does Batman Inc. fall for you?"  Yeah, we are not out of the k-hole that is Grant Morrison yet. Not nearly.

21:59-43:07:  And so we're out, via discussion of Batman #17, the "Death of the Family" finale by Snyder and Capullo. Graeme references the discussion that he had over at Kotaku with his smart friends, and it's only fair I include a link to that here.  Graeme also talks about the follow-up issue of Batman & Robin which Jeff forgot to pick up at the store, dammit.

43:07-50:54: We discuss Justice League of America #1.  Has it been a while since we've really dug into DC titles, or is it just me?

50:54-58:14:  But speaking of not speaking of Marvel, Graeme read issue #6 of The Avengers by Hickman & Kubert thinking Jeff would've read but didn't and then he has to talk about it all by himself.  Haw, haw! Sucker.

58:14-1:01:43: Jeff has read Thor #5 by Aaron & Ribic, and man is that a pretty book. This isn't much of a review as much of a collection of spoilers with a bunch of fanning compliments about the art, but, eh.  That's how it happens sometimes.

1:01:43-1:04:39:  Jeff also read the first issue of Nova by Jeph Loeb and Ed McGuinness and was pretty surprised to find himself enjoying it.  (Not such a fan of Avengers/X-Sanction was ol' Jeff.)

1:04:39-1:07:13:  Graeme really liked issue #23 of Daredevil by Mark Waid and Chris Samnee, which apparently is a great jumping-on point for the book.  Jeff is pretty jealous.  The term "a perfect superhero comic" is used as well as the phrase "amazing, amazing stuff."

1:07:13-1:13:55:  Jeff asks about the Superman H'el on Earth storyline because, eh, he's honestly curious.  What can he say?  And Graeme gives all the deets. Unfortunately, at this point, Jeff's head moves one step closer to its MODOK stage and the crunching of the headphones tightening around his ears can be heard in the background. Embarrassing and awkward!

1:13:55-1:26:46:  Also, does Graeme have a take on the new Green Lantern teams?  Whatnauts wanted to know, so Jeff also asks about that bit of business. A bit of analysis about what DC is doing and where they're heading is probably inevitable.

1:26:46-1:50:54:  And of course we are going to discuss "Oscar Scott Card." Probably also inevitable.  There's also some discussion of Jeff and his ever-growing collection of bad-faith boycotts that may be kind of interesting to some.  A surprising admission is made, let's just say.

1:50:54-1:54:34: More comic reviewy stuff!  Uncanny X-Men #1 by Bendis and Bachalo has been read by Jeff so he blabs about it for a bit.

1:54:34-2:14:02:  Last issue of Hellblazer!  It's been read by Graeme so he blabs about it for a bit, as well.  (Spoiler alerts, of course.)  He's got a great prediction here for a possible announcement during con season--be on the look-out for it.

2:14:02-end:  Winding down/update for any Graeme stalkers: will Graeme be attending ECCC? Or other conventions?  Also: Graeme listened to House to Astonish Ep. 100 (see above--but, yes, I will also link it again). Also, if you are in Oslo on June 7 and 8, check out the Oslo Comics Expo!  We will be back next week with more podcastery!  (And we promise to answer our outstanding questions next time, we promise! Even I'm a little appalled we didn't answer any this time around.)

The episode is probably up on iTunes of this entry--if only because all of my attempts to launch this early Tuesday morning has gone awry the last three or four months.  But you can also grab it below, should you wish:

Wait, What? Ep. 116: G-Mo K-Hole

We hope you enjoy and thanks for listening!

"I Tried Everything Else." COMICS! Sometimes Chaykin's Awake!!!

Hopefully you all made it through any storms okay, my American friends! If you did I've got some rubbish about comics for ya.Content! You might not want it, you might not like it but it's there!

G.I. COMBAT #5 Featuring The Haunted Tank Art by Howard Victor Chaykin Story and Words by Peter J. Tomasi Coloured by Jesus Arbutov Lettered by Rob Leigh The Unknown Soldier Art by Staz Johnson Written by Jimmy Palmiotti and Justin Gray Coloured by Rob Schwager Lettered by Rob Leigh The Haunted Tank created by Russ Heath and Robert Kanigher The Unknown Soldier created byJoe Kubert and Robert Kanigher DC Comics, $3.99 (2012)

First up, I have to thank Corey (Ottawa) for bringing this comic to my attention. If it wasn't for our Canadian Contingent I'd not have known the art chores on this were by everyone's favourite filth peddler Mr. Howard Victor Chaykin! I wasn't expecting much here to be honest, I thought he'd probably be busy drawing comics too frisky for the UK to have any electrolytes left over for a book about a, well, a haunted tank.  I don't know if it's being able to clip art the shit out of this book due to its emphasis on hardware but the bits that aren't hardware have Howard Victor Chaykin pounding the pages with a barrage of highly entertaining images. Unlike, so I hear, the pounding he's giving the pages in that other (banned) book.

Tomasi gives him a totally stupid story to illustrate involving a nutty veteran clad in The Flag being tank-napped into a supernatural rescue mission while being pursued by Wonder Woman's high-tech ex Steve Trevor. It is nonsensical stuff but, I don't know if you've ever given it much thought but, the whole concept of The Haunted Tank isn't going to win any awards for realism. So why not go wide on the goofiness.  Chaykin seems to be enjoying himself and it all comes together a lot more successfully than some of his recent efforts. Not once did Jesus Arbutov's colour work have me reaching to ring the police and at times I was tempted to throw back my head and bellow Blessed-style "CHAYKIN'S AWAKE!!!"  Maybe he just enjoyed ringing up his russety pal Russ Heath and irritating him by going "Pop! Just drawn a tank! Pop! Just drew another! These computers are great! Now how long did it used to take you to draw these tanks, Russ? Pop! Drew another! Hey, I ever tell ya I can see the beach from my window?" I don't know, I just really enjoyed his stuff this time out. It was GOOD!

WOLVERINE MAX #1 Art by Roland Boschi & Connor Willumsen Written by Jason Starr Coloured by Dan Brown Lettered by VC's Cory Petit Wolverine created by Len Wein, John Romita Snr and Herb Trimpe Marvel, $3.99 (2012)

While Jason Starr is a good writer of novels and I have also been known to enjoy the work of Roland Boschi the real reason I picked this up was because of Connor Willumsen. He does not disappoint! Boschi's pages seem somewhat rushed and concern the present day Wolverine fighting sharks and having no memory of why he ended up doing that. Also, his legs grow back and everyone is only slightly perturbed by this. Perturbed's too strong a word actually. I know health care professionals are rushed off their feet and are basically the busiest people in show-business and The Japanese are a modest people...but I think two legs growing back, bones and all, would cause more than a raised eyebrow and a muttered aside, suggesting such an event is more a case of exhibitionism than it is straight up miraculous. Jason Starr's handling of Wolverine's talents but in the real world is off to a choppy start is what I'm saying.

Willumsen, however, burns rubber from the off with his flashback scenes which portray Daniel Day Lewis from There Will Be Blood stepping into the original Claremont/Miller mini-series but in a grubbily humming Underground Comix stylee. So amazing are his inky doings that even the writing seems elevated with Victor sounding especially characterful in his disdain for the normals. I would buy this series purely for the further expansion of these elements.  I would but Marvel seem to have upset Connor Willumsen so much that he has jumped ship. His work will not be appearing in any subsequent issues of WOLVERINE MAX and so I will not be buying them as without him this comic will be less than GOOD! Well done there, Marvel! Yes, that is sarcasm.

DAREDEVIL: END OF DAYS #1 Art by Klaus Janson and Bill Sienkiewicz Written by Brian Michael Bendis & David Mack Coloured by Matt Hollingsworth Lettered by VC's Joe Caramagna Daredevil created by Bill Everett and Stan Lee Marvel, $3.99 (2012)

I asked my LCS why they sent this (you're darned tooting I did) and they said it was because I liked Janson and Sienkiewickz, which is true. What they failed to factor in is that ladling the  steaming hot writing of Brian Michael Bendis over the top of their efforts is, at this stage in the game, like climbing a stepladder to fart repeatedly right in my face as I admire a Vermeer. It's distractingly puerile and pretty quickly spoils the whole experience. The best bit (i.e. the very worst bit of very many bad bits) is when Ben Urich's (very long, very, very fucking awful) monologue accuses his audience (his readers, geddit!) of not appreciating words. This is super-awesome because he's being written by someone who treats the English language with all the care and attention of a hungover abattoir worker placing his bolt-gun to a steer's head.

This is a writer who seems to have a working vocabulary of, maybe, fifty words and whose solution to every writing conundrum (an introduction to The Incal, an introduction to a HVC art book, a recipe for quiche, instructions on how to install a Norton Commando Boyer ignition etc) is always a chatty, faux-conversational, uninformative, space devouring style which smashes grammar's head in with a brick and is in no way to be taken as an indication of a complete inability to write anything approaching a joined up sentence. Christ, this is why I ask my LCS not to send his (dismal, dismal) stuff. This comic is smug, vacuous, inane, pandering, complacent ineptitude par excellence. This comic is CRAP! I did not like it.

THE INFERNAL MAN-THING #3 Art by Kevin Nowlan Written by Steve Gerber Lettered by Todd Klein Also "...Man-Thing!" from Savage Tales #1 Art by Gray Morrow Written by Gerry Conway & Roy Thomas Man-Thing created by Stan Lee, Roy Thomas, Gerry Conway and Gray Morrow Marvel, $3.99 (2012)

And so we close the comic and close the curtain on one Steve Gerber as he defies the laws of nature and reality to bow out of comics for the final time, some four years after his physical death. As we bite back the tears lets allow a manly clap on the back for Kevin Nowlan who did Gerber proud twice over with beautifully considered art to which he then applied a thoughtful and innovative colour palette.  Together with this final VERY GOOD! chapter of Gerber's playful, humane and imaginative end-song Marvel have also included Manny's first appearance.  Whether placing an ending with a beginning together in such close proximity is Marvel's way of acknowledging the Cycle of Life or just another attempt to squeeze a property until the pips squeak we'll probably never know. (Steve Gerber would have known.)

FATALE #8 By Sean Phillips and Ed Brubaker With colours by Dave Stewart Fatale created by Sean Phillips and Ed Brubaker Image, $3.50 (2012)

I've not been impressed with this series so far but I will admit that while this issue still wasn't terribly good it was a whole lot better. Maybe it had something to with a sudden upswing in the density of incident or the fact that Phillips' art seemed more lively since he was given a couple of occasions on which to strut his stuff style-wise.  I still don't find it to be convincingly evocative of a time and place; it'll take more than some beards in a VW van to make me swoon at the authenticity of the '7os vibe, man.  At times I can almost smell the spirit glue holding all the sideburns on. Most deflating of all is the fact that the series is still hamstrung by bizarrely conservative and old-fashioned sense of horror (tentacles! men in robes with daggers! cemeteries!) which means the horror is never actually, well, horrible.

The humourlessness of the whole thing has also struck me recently; this was unfortunate because I then realised I couldn't recall one incidence of humour in all the work I've read by this author. That's a lot of pages in which to not crack a smile. Maybe it's me. Senses of humour are personal after all but still  the funniest thing in FATALE #8 is when the rather tasteless competition in the lettercol results in one John Cleaver out writing this whole series with just one paragraph. Mind you, if any readers do want to send me pictures of them crying while they remember horribly traumatic events from their lives they are welcome to do so(*). Get really close in there so I can see the fat bulbs of those tears bloating from your sad ducts, kids! The winner could receive a pen! So, yeah, this issue was OKAY! and you can buy it from The Savage Critics Digital Shop...here! (Although if more than 10% of the comics reading audience do so a big red light starts flashing and Brian Hibbs starts rushing everyone to the shelters as AROOOGA! AROOOGA! echoes rounds his shaggy head. It's a true fact, cats and kittens!)

(*) Don't do this. It's a joke.

ACTION COMICS #13 Featuring... Superman in..."The Ghost In The Fortress of Solitude" Art by Travel Foreman Written by Grant Morrison Coloured by Brad Anderson Lettered by Steve Wands Superman in..."A Boy And His Dog" Art by Brad Walker (p) & Andrew Hennessy(i) Written by Sholly Fisch Coloured by Jay David Ramos Lettered by Patrick Brosseau Superman created by Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster DC Comics, $3.99 (2012)

It's strange the connections your mind makes. In my head Morrison's recent callous remarks regarding the treatment of Siegel and Shuster and the portrayal of animals throughout his work suggests to me one of those lovely people who care more for the feelings of animals than those of people. Which is all really cuddly on the surface until you press them on the issue and they suddenly hiss at you that people deserve what they get! Which I find a less than generous rationale and more than a little confusing in its mix of sentiment and insensitivity. Almost as confusing as this comic which I have a strong suspicion makes no sense but as I too have a soft spot for tales of the gud dog I'll let its muddled nature pass this time and say this comic was OKAY!

So yeah, those were certainly some words about what I believe scientists are now calling COMICS!!!

Everyone Loses: Hibbs on 9/3's cape comics

Four superhero books below that cut!

AVENGERS VS X-MEN #12:  Man, it would be nice to have a Marvel crossover once that ended right. I don't know what frustrates me more: Captain America's extraordinary hypocrisy in the face of the breaking point he engendered, or why no one is asking about what happens with all of the *good* stuff that the Phoenix Five engineered (food, energy, water, worldwide). but, these are superhero comics, and superhero comics don't like dealing with ramifications, do they? Like I said back at the review of #1, this comic clearly is reviewer-proof; nothing I could say or do would impact it's entire success as a commercial juggernaut -- I'm certainly selling twice or more copies of AvX than I do of either of the component characters any longer.

The thing is, I'm afraid that this series fundamentally broke the X-Men -- what are they any longer?

With Xavier dead, the mutants no longer an "extinct race", Cyclops considered a super-villain, what's presumably the world's stock of Sentinels melted down (along with all of the battleships and nuclear weapons in #6) "Uncanny Avengers", and so on -- well, what's next? Where can you go from here? The core metaphor might still have need today -- but can the X-Men still be the spirit of alienation in any clear way when mutants are now responsible for bringing peace and food and water to Africa, y'know? I have my doubts, especially because the first new x-book off the blocks this week is actually an Avengers title, and the "flagship" X-comic is going to be a time-travel story, which doesn't even sound remotely sustainable to me as an ongoing monthly.

At the end of the day, I thought AVENGERS VS X-MEN #12 was pretty AWFUL. Though I doubt that's any real surprise to anyone out there. I also thought that the X-Men "won", in that Cyclops was right, and his species is now viable again... even though they're left at the end as being a largely irrelevent concept in the Marvel Universe. Funny how those things work out.

AVX #6: As a modern piece of comedy, I thought this was generally pretty darn GOOD. "Captain America is level 15 in Guilt Trips," indeed! Though the Hawkeye sexploitation dream was pretty dang grody, and prevented the book from scoring higher.

DAREDEVIL END OF DAYS #1:  I was originally looking forward to this, because on paper, at least, it sounds good: Bendis, Mack, Janson, Sienkiewicz all back on Daredevil for one final story. Too bad the result is a gory mess, with multiple scenes of people beating each other to death. Yay, comics? Overall the art, mostly Jansen being inked by Sienkiewicz, has the worst of each artist's tics, though there are a few nice and painted panels that entirely work. Seeing those lovely panels make the rest of the book look that much worse, sadly.  Pretty AWFUL.

LEGENDS OF THE DARK KNIGHT #1: So, this is a collection of  Batman stories that, as far as I know, ran as digital content before being collected here.  This is the fourth (fifth?) "re-purposed" digital comic, and, at my store at least, sales have all been uniformly awful on these books, but I can't tell if it is the chicken, or if it is the egg. Batman, in serialization, is going through a pretty nice period right now -- BATMAN itself is my top selling DC comic. and all five of his monthly books are selling at least 25 copies a month for me. This one? I sold 2 copies in week 1, and I'm not expecting that to grow in any manner I'm willing to carry the risk on. So, is LDK flopping out because it is digital first, and people don't want leftovers? Or is it flopping because it's Batman-led comic #6? Or is it flopping because it is shitty?

There are three stories here, one by Damon Lindelof & Jeff Lemire which is close to the worst Batman story I've ever read being, I think, a "what if?" of "What If Batman was an arrogant drunk?" Hrf?!? The second two stories are kind of  NEW TALENT SHOWCASE teaming newer writers with solid artists (JG Jones, Nicola Scott) -- but the stories aren't any great shakes, neither rising above what you might hope for in a new talent anthology series: not shitty, exactly, but not so great either. At least not for $4.

The bigger problem, for me, is that these comics are kind of the "proof of concept" for the problem of what you do for natively-digital work when the iPad landscape/computer monitor being different proportions from the printed page.  Mark Waid was the first person I ever heard who said, "Duh, just plop the two screens on top of each other, and your back to normal proportions", and I thought he was genius when he said that.

Except... now I've seen what it looks like in practice. It is... not very good.

So, first, if you're even slightly aware of it, you can "see" the weld made on each page as writers are aiming the "beat" for the bottom-rightmost panel of each "page", except each page now has two of THOSE, and it TOTALLY blows the "rhythm" of the comics page.

Second, because you have to present the page smaller than it displays on monitor/iPad, it feels oddly cramped, with too-small lettering.

Third, it really shows just how limited the landscape format is for density-of-content -- It is hard to cleanly fit more than 4 "panels" on any "page", then, which gives you an extremely limited number of choices of page layout and panel arrangement. then you see that twice on each printed page, and it is kind of a mess.

So, I guess now I really don't think that digital comics can be reformatted to print in this way without kind of crashing out the beauty and strength of the real unit of comic books: the page. I thought the Lindlehof story was AWFUL, but the rest was decent enough it could drag the entire book closer to an EH.

That's me, what did YOU think?

-B

"Walter-bout An Audition?" COMICS! Sometimes It's That Company That Doesn't Respect Jack Kirby!

Then I read some Marvel comics! I wouldn't want anyone to accuse me of being in DC's pocket now would I? I should bloody cocoa, chum! So yeah, the same one-note entitled whining will now follow but with different pictures posted in between the words! Bountiful Brian Hibbs' Shipping List is under this linguistic lard!

MUPPETS #3 (of 4) Written and Drawn by Roger Langridge Colours by Kawaii Creative Studio Lettered by Litomilano S.r.l Marvel Comics, $2.99 (2012) The Muppets created by Jim Henson

This is an all-ages comic written and drawn by Roger Langridge. For those who balk at the very mention of “all-ages” let me just clarify that Roger Langridge is a consummate cartoonist and a craftsman of no little sophistication. He’s been banging about for a while but quite a lot of people still seem surprised he exists. No, THOR THE MIGHTY AVENGER with Chris Samnee wasn't his first work. This probably won’t be the last time I mention Roger Langridge is what I’m saying. This Muppets comic was his last work for Marvel before he went off and embarked on the Eisner award winning SNARKED.

Anyway, here he creates a comic which not only recreates the madcap bustle of the original Muppets Show without losing any of the distinctive personalities in the joyfully rambunctious chaos, but also chucks in a plot and jokes which all revolve around the slightly melancholy themes Autumn suggests without descending into mawkish sentimentality. He’s helped in no small part by his wonderfully expressive art, with its bounciness of line and emphasis on clarity and characterisation. I originally bought this for JKUKv.2.0 but it turns out the violent pig woman scares him so I guess I’ll just have to read it myself. Or stop doing the voices, maybe. That’s okay because being a parent is all about sacrifice and just like Roger Langridge, this comic is VERY GOOD!

In the back of THE MUPPETS is a preview of the way Marvel will produce comics in the future. This excremental extra bills itself as ULTIMATE SPIDER-MAN: GREAT POWER Digest but it is in fact Satan's balls rubbed right up in your face. Creatively speaking. It is apparently a whole wee book of screen grabs taken from the TV show arranged on the page with all the finesse and care you would expect of a dead robot. It is a thing. A thing of Evil.

Buying this for your child is exactly like stamping on the neck of Comics. It is the artistic equivalent of wearing your own bum as a hat. I am so livid I have stopped making sense. It is CRAP! Shun it as you would shun The Devil himself! Or, you know, have a look and make your own mind up.

UNTOLD TALES OF THE PUNISHERMAX#4 Art by Fernando Blanco Written by Nathan Edmondson Coloured by James Campbell Lettered by VC's Cory Petit Marvel Comics, $3.99 (2012) The Punisher created by Gerry Conway, John Romita Snr and Ross Andru

In this awe inspiring exercise in unoriginality if you have a problem and no one else can help you can simply roll on up to Frank’s local Chinese where he’ll be tucking into some dim sum, flash a few photos of your dead daughter and he’s off. His first stop is a boat where a Bad man is touching two ladies. In crime stories Bad men always have more than one lady in bed at a time and Bad men also have a penchant for flash boats. This is because Bad men enjoy a good hard fishing and are too cheap to buy hot water bottles. Frank then tortures the bad man by hanging him over the water and cutting him until a shark obligingly shows up. This doesn't take long because, just as in London you are never more than 5 feet away from a rat, if you are a Bad man hung upside down being tortured on your own boat you are never more than 30 seconds from a shark. There is a quip! No, not “sharks to be you!” or “tooth bad!” or “you look a bit down in the mouth!” no they went with “over your head!” Clever word play there. Frank says this more than once in the issue and, like the dialogue of Michael Bendis, it doesn't work any better with repetition. Then there’s some violence which is unpredictable only to the extent that it is so predictable. Frank finds Mr. Big but to be frank(!) finding Mr. Big doesn't turn out to be that difficult. I've had more trouble finding someone who can lay flagstones that don’t wobble after the first hard frost than Frank has following the breadcrumbs of crime here. Obviously in my case there was less standing on car roofs and shooting unerringly down into the tops of people’s heads, but overall tracking a competent builder to his lair was a lot more work than finding the head of a white slavery ring is in this comic. Then: more violence. Holy shit! Frank just got shot!

Jesus fucking Christ, Frank’s dead! Holy Coconut Balls! Hold onto your hats here - the guy who shot Frank was the guy who hired him! TWISTAMATAZZ! He was using Frank to get rid of the competition! This is some Byzantine labyrinthine shit going on here! Hold on while I pull out the whiteboard and diagram this one so I can follow it properly! TWISTGASM! Frank’s alive! To the surprise of precisely no one except the chowderhead who shot him it turns out Frank was wearing a vest! Not a string one either because they are a bit creepy, no, nor a thermal one despite the fact it’s so chilly even rich criminals are having to sleep three-in-a-bed to keep the chill off, no, a bulletproof one! Frank kills everyone and that makes everything okay. The end. Previous issues of this series have avoided the charge of being an unnecessary cash-grab by at least having artwork which justified the price of purchase alone. The art in this issue does not do that, I’m leaving it at that. (Also, issue 3 was dire on a words and pictures level too, but it dodges a bullet because I’m trying to appear timely so I've gone straight to kicking this one around.) If this thing reached publication without anyone involved once noticing it was CRAP! then your system is broken, Marvel. The only original thought here is to put so much unoriginality in one place and charge three monkey-humping dollars and ninety nine cents for it. Christ.

DAREDEVIL#18 Art by Chris Samnee Written by Mark Waid Coloured by Javier Rodriguez Lettered by VC's Joe Caramagna Marvel, $2.99 (2012) Daredevil created by Stan Lee and Bill Everett

Ah, Milla’s back. I was hoping this run was going to shun the inexplicably popular Marvel Knights run. Said run being primarily just a reminder of the bad old days when I didn't trust my own judgement. That was then but now, for me, none of that bullshit happened. Wait! I don’t think I've alienated enough of you so let’s just briefly run the MK years down: Kevin Smith! I know it’s hard for some of the youngsters out there to countenance but there was actually a time when people took Kevin Smith’s writing seriously. Maybe because with so many words on each page it was statistically likely that some of them would be worthwhile? So much for statistics! Michael Bendis and Alex Maleev provided a run that managed to eke out the premise of a Harmony Hairspray advert for five horribly chatty photo-sourced years (“What happened to you?” “I got shot.” “You got shot?” “I got shot.” “Wait, you got shot? With a bullet?” “I got shot with a bullet, yes.” “Oh. This is just verbal chaff isn't it?” “Shhh! How’s that nervous breakdown?” “Fine. I had a bit of a lie down and it’s gone away.” “DEMON BABY!”) then Ed Brubaker wrote Murdock increasingly as a Man Without Sense (“I gamble everything on the fact that my mentally ill ex-foe who is being mind controlled won’t throw my wife off the ro…oh, snap!” ). And now Milla’s back. Great.

It wouldn't usually be too bad because there’s often lots of other stuff going on but this issue seems a bit…lighter in the density department. It doesn't seem to cover as much ground as it used to does it? I mean, these are some big ass panels we've got going on here. Luckily they are big asses saturated with the fat of Chris Samnee’s fantastic art, art which is currently exploring a beautiful obsession with Alex Toth via his animation storyboards. Lovely to look at but a bit light on content is how the “in” in indispensable starts slipping off. I’m holding my breath but this is going to have to get back to being better than just GOOD!

Did you know that "monkey humping is in Word Press' spell check? I don't know what that means but it scares me.

NEXT TIME: Some other companies who make COMICS!!!

"Clod. I Have WEAPONS..." Comics! Sometimes They Are Almost Fresh!

It's a post about comics! Is it early? Is it late? Time is in flux!Only if one man can face his Pull List can The Balance be restored!

One Man. One Pull List. There will be Words... (...probably the wrong ones).

ACTION COMICS #6 “When Superman Learned To Fly” by By Andy Kubert/John Dell(a), Grant Morrison(w), Brad Anderson(c) and Patrick Brosseau(l) and “Last Day” by Chriscross(a), Sholly Fish(w), Jose Vallarubia(c) and Carlos M. Mangual(l) (DC Comics, $3.99) Superman created by Jerry Siegel and Joe Shuster.

 I like that stuff in my comics but I'm not unaware that in real life that kind of thinking gets you killed.

While there could be said to be many faults with the lead story in this issue such as an apparent attempt to distract from a lack of clarity (or indeed even sense) with a belligerently unslackening pace and art that once again belies Andy Kubert's alleged superstar status it remains a fact that in this story Superman's enemies conduct an auction for Kryptonite within Superman's own brain (physically, literally within Superman's own brain) and Superman uses his own Kryptonite poisoned body as a battery to save his both his own sentient ship and the day entire. Yes, Superman's enemies conduct an auction for Kryptonite within Superman's own brain (physically, literally within Superman's own brain) and Superman uses his own Kryptonite poisoned body as a battery to save his both his own sentient ship and the day entire. That's Superman comics enough for me!

The backup is the kind of sweet and tender emotional snapshot of a transitional moment in life that anyone under forty will treat as though it were sentient dog-muck hellbent on French kissing them; that's okay because I enjoyed it enough for y'all! Yup, ACTION COMICS was GOOD!

 STATUS: REMAINS ON THE LIST!

ALL-STAR WESTERN #6 “Beneath The Bat-Cave” by Moritat(a), Justin Gray & Jimmy Palmiotti(w), Gabriel Bautista(c) and Rob Leigh(l) and “The Barbary Ghost Part 3” by Phil Winslade(a), Justin Gray & Jimmy Palmiotti(w), Dominic Regan(c) and Rob Leigh(l) (DC Comics, $3.99) Jonah Hex created by John Albano and Tony Dezuniga. The Barbary Ghost created by Gray, Palmiotti and Winslade

Kids! How many owls can you spot!

Thank the Great Spirit! Next issue ol' bacon face is off to N'Orleans! where there will no doubt be "gumbo" galore but at least there won't be anymore shoehorning of Batman references into a book that doesn't need them. A cave beneath Wayne Manor! Filled with Bats! This cretinous continuity reached a kind of hilarious nadir with the sudden slew of references to Owls: because Batman is currently encountering stress of a strigiform stripe by all accounts in the here and now! So we get about two pages in which the characters can barely move around the mansion setting for all the owls dangling, roosting, flopping and just plain flailing around the place. It's as though Moritat has snapped and gone "You want owls? Here! Here are your owls! Got enough owls yet? I don't think so! Owls! Here! Now! In your face! All! Owls! Touch them! Touch my owls! Tell me they're pretty! Owls!" and then gone for a long lie down. Stupid owls. Anyway I'm a little bit partial to Jonah so it was still OKAY!

 STATUS: REMAINS ON THE LIST!

ANIMAL MAN #6 “Tights” by Jean Paul Leon & Travel Foreman/Jeff Huett(a), Jeff Lemire(w), Lovern Kindzierski(c) and Jared K. Fletcher(l) (DC Comics,$2.99) Animal Man created by Dave Wood and Carmine Infantino

Movie Cliche #23415678: Sad Dad at fridge with beer and photo of son. Collect the set!

Tricky one this. Has Jeff Lemire done a pitch-perfect satire of the vapid screenwriting cliches that have run roughshod over comics beautiful storytelling devices or does he actually believe this is a decent film script made comics? It's hard to tell isn't it. Heck, I don't know maybe you thought it was awesome? Luckily it's easy to tell that Jean Paul Leon is an awesome artist and hopefully one day he will draw comics as awesome as WINTER MEN again. This issue is a complete waste of time and is clearly a fill-in so next issue we should be back to Travel Foreman and his nightmarish body horror.

After I read the previous issue I fell into a light doze and dreamt about a man in a chair. I was holding the man in the chair via the power of some unknown threat. The man was crying and peeling his own skin off his own face with a small knife. I was then forcing him to eat it via the unspoken promise that if he did as I asked he could go free. The fact that the man was eating his own face was terrible but the worst thing was that we both knew I was lying and he wasn't leaving alive. But he had no choice but to do as I asked because that was his only hope. Yes, it's been a trying few months. They say there's nothing as boring as listening to someone else's dreams but they forgot about reading film scripts masquerading as comics which is so boring such comics are EH!

STATUS: REMAINS ON THE LIST (BUT WATCH IT)!

BATWOMAN#6 “To Drown The World - Part One” by Amy Reeder/Rob Hunter/Richard Friend(a) J.H. Williams III & W. Haden Blackman(w), Guy Major(c) and Todd Klein(l) (DC Comics,$2.99) Batwoman created by Bob Kane and Sheldon Moldoff (modern version by Greg Rucka and Alex Ross).

"Given the state of your medical insurance talking's about all you can afford so knock yourself out is my advice."

Wuh-hoof! That's certainly a change in artist alright. I'll stick it out for a bit because I always like people to get a fair shake of the critic stick. Initially I'm not  finding myself a fan of Reeder's thin line but I appreciate her attempts to step up her layouts. Given the writing is competent at best (actually that's a compliment in today's world o'comics) Reeder's got it all on her to raise this one up from EH!

STATUS: REMAINS ON THE LIST (FOR NOW!)

DAREDEVIL #9 By Paolo Rivera/Joe Rivera(a), Mark Waid(w), Javier Rodriguez(c) and VC’s Joe Caramagna(c) (Marvel Comics, $2.99) Daredevil created by Bill Everett and Stan Lee.

Storytelling in 'Not Dead' shock!

Unless Howard Victor Chaykin has been reactivated without my knowledge I guess this is the only Marvel comic I'm buying. That doesn't seem right, I'll have to check. Anyway, I'm buying this because Mark Waid understands that the bit with the boot is funnier and cleverer because it only takes up one panel. It's because Rivera Jnr and Snr make all kinds of spooky magic happen on these pages. It's because together the team on the book achieve the kind of synergy that results in the storytelling stuff from which the above image is but a sample. Yup, DAREDEVIL is a purchase because it is VERY GOOD!

(Hey, I hear Chris Samnee is coming aboard! I told you all I'd wait for him!)

STATUS: REMAINS ON THE LIST!

DEMON KNIGHTS #6 “The Balance” by Diogenes Neves & Robson Rocha with Oclair Albert(a), Paul Cornell(w), Marcelo Maiolo(c) and Jared K. Fletcher(l)(DC Comics, $2.99) The Demon created by Jack Kirby. Shining Knight originally created by Creig Flessel (modern incarnation created by Simone Bianchi and Grant Morrison). Vandal Savage created by Alfred Bester and Martin Nodell. Madame Xanadu created by Michael William Kaluta.

His reply is actually quite funny but I'm still baling.

Nah. I'm done. It just didn't work for me. Which is a shame as it wasn't terrible as such it just never gelled. Way too diffuse and lacking in focus both from a scripting and art standpoint. I mean, how big was this village, where was everything in relation to everything else? But like I say it wasn't terrible and I wish all involved well and hope the book works out further down the line but there are plenty of books I can read that aren't EH! And that's where my money's got to go. It's the Law of The Direct Market; savage and unrestrained!

STATUS: OFF THE LIST!

FATALE Number Two By Ed Brubaker, Sean Phillips and Dave Stewart (Image Comics, $3.50) Fatale created by Ed Brubaker and Sean Phillips.

 ...probably because for some odd reason she's drawn to look about 8 years old and acts as subtly as a silent movie siren?

People tend to refer to books by this team as "Brubaker" books don't they? Which is odd as I find Brubaker to be the least of the appeal they hold. I guess it's that whole Cult of The Writer thing or something. Hey now, hang on, I'm not saying Brubaker isn't good. He's got craft/technique/skill/whatever we're calling it now in spades it's just the result is, for me, mostly solid rather than inspired. Except when he gets Meta which is when the wheels start wobbling like they're about to pitch a fit (remember INCOGNITO where working in an office was "like" doing Indie comics but taking to the streets and letting your inner nature run wild was "like" working in the mainstream? Really? Um.). On the whole though I get well crafted genre staples served up with a slight twist but the real pleasure I get from this team's comics is in the form of Phillips and Stewart in conjunction with Brubaker. I'm not going to just roll around showing my belly because it hasn't got capes'n'tights in it, okay?

Here, I guess the High Concept (sigh) is Crime and Horror - together! Like Hope and Cosby! Like Morecambe and Wise! Which is fine because,hey, I like both. I'm not sure they belong smushed together though except as one of those novelty type deals. Y'know, all those Steve Niles things Steve Niles does. I guess Crime fiction tells us about the worst in ourselves and so does Horror fiction; they just use different tools. Using both sets just seems like doubling up and risking the results seeming lesser. Early days though, I mean, look at what porting Horror tropes into Crime did for James Ellroy ($$$$ is what it did, kids. Woof! Woof!). I don't think we're looking at an Ellroy here but we may be looking at an Angel Heart. And that's fine. I got a thing about chickens, Mr. Cyphre; as in I don't like to count them too soon but this one looks GOOD! so far.

STATUS: REMAINS ON THE LIST!

FRANKENSTEIN: AGENT of S.H.A.D.E. #6 “The Siege of S.H.A.D.E. City – Part One” by Alberto Ponticelli(a), Jeff Lemire(w), Jose Villarrubia(c) and Travis Lanham(l) (DC Comics, $2.99) Frankenstein: Agent of S.H.A.D.E created by Doug Mahnke and Grant Morrison (and Mary Shelley).

I am always happy to see the word "buffoons"!

There's a bit in this issue that is pretty much a stealth WATCHMEN (by Alan Moore, Dave Gibbons and John Higgins) reference. It's the scene in the 'Nam bar between The Comedian and Doc Manhattan but here with Franky and a red, bald dude who is, basically, Dr. Manhattan and without any pregnant woman shooting or face glassing. That is to say without any of the actual important or troubling content. I'd call that an Omen were I of a credulous nature. Otherwise it's yet another issue of Hellboy in the DCU and which is Okefenokee by me!

STATUS: REMAINS ON THE LIST!

JUSTICE LEAGUE DARK#4 and #5 “In The Dark - Part Four and Finale” by Mikel Janin(a), Peter Milligan(w), Ulises Arreola(c) and Rob Leigh(l) (DC Comics, $2.99ea) John Constantine created by Alan Moore, John Totleben, Rick Veitch and Steve Bissette. Madame Xanadu created by Michael William Kaluta. Deadman created by Arnold Drake and Carmine Infantino. Shade, The Changing Man created by Steve Ditko. Zatanna created by Gardner Fox and Murphy Anderson. Enchantress created by Bob Haney and Howard Purcell. Dove created by Steve Ditko. Mindwarp created by Peter Milligan.

Stealth WATCHMEN reference#2. We get it, DC! You WIN!

I haven't enjoyed this. It's all been a bit like warmed-over '90s Milligan with stuff like "In Nebraska The Pokemon come alive and the screams of the bread-cakes dance like glass-kneed OAPs." Okay, not as warmed-over '90s Milligan as that DEFENDERS#1 preview perhaps but still not terribly inspired. I mean the sheer scale of events would suggest the body count is in the hundreds of thousands not to mention the country-wide trauma involved but there's no sense of any consequences.

No, I didn't like it. I did, however, enjoy Milligan's skeevy interpretation of Deadman. I would totally read a Peter Milligan Deadman series in which Deadman acted like one of those fantastic men who pressure their missus into all kinds of sexual situations that the missus clearly isn't all that into and it's all just about the guy exerting power over her so that's she's eventually roiling around in moral squalor with only the "fact" that he loves her to keep her sane. At which point the hilarious rogue tells her she's a sl*t and leaves her to fall to pieces while he starts the whole cycle with some other vulnerable woman. I think a comic like that would bring in new readers. Sh*theads mostly, but hey, sales are down! We can't afford to be be proud anymore! Despite creepy Deadman JLA: DARK was EH!

STATUS: DROPPED!

O.M.A.C. #5 and #6 “Occasionally Monsters Accidentally Crossover” By Keith Giffen/Scott Koblish(a), Dan Didio, Jeff lemire & Keith Giffen(w), Hi-Fi(c) and Travis Lanham(l) “One More Amorous Conflict” By Scott Kolins/Scott Koblish(a), Dan Didio & Keith Giffen(w), Hi-Fi(c) and Travis Lanham(l) (DC Comics, $2.99ea) O.M.A.C. created by Jack Kirby.

It's the hot dog that makes it great!

In #5 O.M.A.C. and Frankenstein Agent of S.H.A.D.E have a great big slobberknocker which entertains and amuses me on a base level which I have no shame in gratifying since I am okay with comics just being goofy, colourful fun. With #6 I realise that the main reason I like O.M.A.C is because of Keith Giffen's art because with #6 the artwork is by Scott Kolins and the only memorable thing about the issue is the fact that Leilani's breasts are pancaked in the same manner that Caroline Munro's were in The Golden Voyage of Sinbad. Yes, I realise that reflects badly on me as a human being but, honestly, what reflects badly on us as a society is the fact that we have fallen so low so fast that when you read The Golden Voyage of Sinbad you automatically assumed I was talking about a p*rn film rather than a children's fantasy film from the '7os.  So, um, anyway O.M.A.C was GOOD!

STATUS: REMAINS ON THE LIST!

PUNISHERMAX#22 “War’s End” By Steve Dillon(a), Jason Aaron(w), Matt Hollingsworth(c) and VC’s Cory Pettit(l) (MAX/Marvel Comics, $3.99) The Punisher created by Gerry Conway, Ross Andru and John Romita Snr.

"Now that we've solved the Energy Crisis! Who's up for a brewski!"

PUNISHERMAX#22 may just be the most subversive comic I read this year. Oh, not because of the ending because...really, Jason Aaron? Really? That's your ending? We can solve all societies problems by just rising up and killing the sh*t out of other folks? Really? Heck, maybe we just need a strong leader as well? Fancy your chances do you, Jason Aaron? What a crappy ending. Mind you, I live in a country where we only arm The Police, The Army and farmers. What? No, I don't know why we arm farmers, maybe because of all the lions? Or maybe they keep being carried off by subsidies in the night. Stop getting distracted by details. So, okay, maybe that ending is a bit more reasonable over there in The Americas. If it is, I will pray for you all. Christ, that irresponsible ending.

No, PUNISHERMAX #22 may just be the most subversive comic I have read all year because of the scene involving Elektra. Elektra is at the Hand headquarters after a savage battle with Frank. Elektra has served The Hand well for many years but now Elektra needs help from The Hand. Specifically medical help. But I guess The Hand doesn't have Health Insurance for its employees and since Elektra is no longer of any use to them they have no qualms in cutting her loose in the most final of ways. Despite knowing full well the conditions of her employment Elektra is still surprised and dismayed at this turn of events. But she should have expected it, really, because that's what you get for working for Marv..I mean The Hand. Say, is something bothering you, Jason Aaron? Stuff on your mind?

Oh, PUNISHERMAX was entertaining enough and the fact that I could never reconcile the interesting parts with the witless parts of it actually made it more interesting and brought the whole thing up to GOOD!

STATUS: Cancelled or Came To A Natural End When The Author Had Told The One Frank Castle Story He Felt He Was Born To Write. (Oh, yeah!)

RASL #13 By Jeff Smith (a/w/l) (Cartoon Books, $3.50) RASL created by Jeff Smith.

There's a couple of reasons I really like RASL. There used to be pretty much just one reason; that although none of the individual elements actually seemed unique in and of themselves they were combined in such a way as to present a story notable for its novelty and also the freshness of its presentation. There are many scenes in RASL which you have seen in other stories but this is not a problem with RASL because it isn't really a problem at all unless it is a problem with all stories. It is a problem with some stories because they will just go for the default setting of said scene; the one that's floating closest to the surface of the popular imagination due to repetition and exposure via Hollywood blockbusters for example.

Look at the Avengers Vs. X-Men preview and ask yourself whether the life sappingly tedious familiarity of every scene is intentional and while you have your own attention ask also how many pages until The President says "And may God have Mercy on us all." It's all about familiarity, oh yes, I am aware it's all pitifully legitimised by claims of "homage" but that's cockrot, it's all about familiarity; giving people what they already know they like. Of course eventually familiarity forgets to put its rubber on and breeds something; contempt. Not in the case of RASL though. RASL keeps me on my toes, RASL demands something from me - attention. In return it rewards me with quality entertainment. That seems fair enough to me.

The other, more recent, reason for liking RASL is that unless Jeff Smith has some kind of catastrophic breakdown involving his identity he won't be suing himself anytime soon. Yup, RASL is VERY GOOD!

STATUS: REMAINS ON THE LIST!

STATIC SHOCK #5 and #6 “True Natures” and “Unrepentant” by Scott McDaniel/Andy Owens(a), Scott McDaniel(w), Travis Lanham & Dezi Sienty(l) and Guy Major(c) (DC Comics, $2.99ea) Static created by Dwayne McDuffie and Jean Paul Leon.

 A DC writer on The Internet: Yesterday.

Well, that was certainly a stinker of a thing. I have no problem with Scott McDaniel's art by the way. Sometimes it lacks clarity but I respond well to the boldness of his line and the chunkiness of his figures. I find it quite pleasing on the whole. His writing has, however, been less than stellar. It's hard to know what to say about this disaster really except if you employ someone to write - let them write and let the artist take care of the pictures. It isn't like there's no room for synergy; the two can be responsible for both of those separate aspects but combine them when it comes to the storytelling. It's a collaborative medium, so I've heard. A mess like this just makes me sad. I'm not very savage at all because it dismays me to say STATIC SHOCK was AWFUL!

STATUS: DROPPED!

SWAMP THING#6 “The Black Queen” by Marco Rudy(a), Scott Snyder(w), Val Staples & lee Loughridge(c) and Travis Lanham(l) (DC Comics, $2.99) Swamp Thing created by Len Wein and Berni Wrightson.

This is horrible in all the wrong ways. It's nice having little shout outs to Dick Durock and Len Wein and my Nana Alice and all but, hey, where's the...well, where's anything? Splash page after splash page of nigh-contextless horror does not a narrative make. Seriously, I need to know what's going on on those pages if it's going to freak me out. Marco Rudy's art works hard to evoke the scabby nastiness of the Bissette, Veitch, Totleben years but what is going on? Something to do with rot, something to do with flesh. I'm sympathetic to the notion that specificity kills horror dead on the page but y'know I need some clue or it's just...stuff. And stuff isn't specific enough to be scary. And... The Parliament of Trees? Apparently you just walk up to them with a box of matches and, hey, game over Parliament of Trees. That's...stupid. Worst of all this turns out have just been one of those crappy origins that take six issues. Sure they could wrong foot us at the last and Abby could adopt the mantle but...it still took six issues. Six not very good issues. So yeah, SWAMP THING is EH! Moley, I just checked and it's six issues and counting to the origin, that doesn't help at all.

STATUS: DROPPED!

T.H.U.N.D.E.R. AGENTS #3 “A Godawful Small Affair” by Wes Craig & Walter Simonson/Bob Wiacek(a), Nick Spencer(w), Hi Fi & Lee Loughridge(c) and Jared K. Fletcher (l) (DC Comics, $2.99) T.H.U.N.D.E.R. Agents created by Wallace (“Woody” not “Wally”) Wood and Len Brown.

'Nuff Said!

STATUS: STICKING IT OUT FOR THE LAST THREE ISSUES!

So yeah, hope that was okay. If you disagree with any of it that's fine just let me know and we can throw it around like a pack of terriers with a rat. If you thought it was all totally spot-on then, Hi, Mom! Whatever happens those were my comics and that's what I thought.

Have a good week and remember to read some COMICS!

Wait, What? Ep. 66: Winter Oner-Land

The image above ties into the podcast in only the most tangential of ways (we discuss Frank Springer for the merest of moments) but I had to include this image, in no small part because I've been enjoying Graeme's Comics Advent Calendar over at Blog@ Newsarama so much. (And because...the Hatemonger for the Holidays?  May be even more topical now than when it was published...)

So, anyhoo.  We had one of those podcasts where we only spoke for around ninety minutes and there wasn't much of a place to cut it very neatly.  (I wasn't crazy about doing an hour ten for part one, and thirty minutes for part two.)

So this is a "oner" episode for you, with Mr. McM and I talking about the recently releasedDefenders #1, the power of secret shout-outs, Dark Horse Digital's recent pricing hullaballoo, Avengers vs. X-Men, Bendis leaving Avengers, Spaceman #2, OMAC #4, Daredevil #6, the Lethal Weapon comic that never was, Flash #3, Secret Avengers and Wolverine (both at issue #19) and, yes, of course, The Muppet Movie. It is so very close to being an hour and forty minutes (so! very! close!) and yet, somehow, it isn't.

Is it on iTunes?  Probably!  But it is most certainly here for you right now:

Wait, What? Ep. 66.1: Winter Oner-Land

Our plan is to record this week and, God help us, next week so there should be a steady stream of our patented level of giggly jibber-jabber to carry you into the new year.  As always, we hope you enjoy!  And thank you for listening.

Hibbs and the Single 11/30 (part one)

Haven't finished reading everything yet for the week, so this is just part one... but I'll be pretty close to Old School Savage Critting, here...

ANGEL & FAITH #4: I'm kind of loving this book. I suspect that's because both the premise, as well as the motivation of the protagonists is significantly more focused than over in BUFFY SEASON 9. The art's fab, too. I honestly think this is VERY GOOD stuff. BATMAN ODYSSEY VOL 2 #2: What. The. Fuck? I didn't read #1 (and stopped reading v1 at #4, I think?), but whoa this has taken a serious turn towards the inexplicable with Caveman Batman and Robin, and dinosaur riding and man oh man Neal Adam's style is kind of inherently "serious", y'know, and completely works against what I think is meant to be a Silver Age Pastiche. Or tribute, maybe? Hard to actually tell. His Batman is zooming all around here, at one point really even sounding like a teenage girl (with an "I hate this. I hate this. I hate this." as he starts to ride a giant flying bat, followed by a big ol' "I love this!", yowsers!) I m just utterly baffled at what Adams is going for, and it is ultimately stiff and awkward and weird. So much "Work For Completionists Only", and kind of crazily AWFUL, sorry. DAREDEVIL #6: The idea of a villain with sponsorship patches, like an anti-Booster Gold, is sort of amusing, but that was a bloodier end to the fight than maybe was needed. The McGuffin of the patch was likewise interesting, but I guess I just don't see what the stakes are for DD. The art as is nice as always, but I just couldn't wrap my head around how this was a Daredevil story, and not a Spidey story. still, even with that, it's still a low GOOD. FF #12: I didn't say last week, but I thought FANTASTIC FOUR #600 was pretty terrific, but no I didn't like this. Maybe it's because in a FF book, I want to see one of a quartet of individuals specifically driving the action; or maybe it's because Bobillo's art (dunno for certain if it's a change in base-style, or the inker's work) went from sweet cartoony (like in his run of SHE HULK, man, those are great) to like harder edge euro-styled art. Like, dunno, Alex Nino, and that whole school of Philippine artists that was most prolific at Warren in the 70s? Either way, not a change I liked personally. So, yeah, while I can appreciate the intricacy of FF, this left me feeling pretty distant, so best I can must is a weak OK.

FLASH GORDON ZEITGEIST #1: Back to the top start again on this venerable property, and it is done with adequate style -- more enjoyable than the BUCK ROGERS reboot from last year, say. I'm just kind of loath to recommend any Dynamite book to people because I know if it show the slightest chance of catching on, Nickie will commission three different spin-off series, and we'll lose all of our readers for it, and have to stop ordering it. But, anyway, that's too meta! There was also an interesting choice at the end to have the rebel aliens come to Earth before ever encountering Flash, which would seem to me to be extremely likely to dramatically shear the central appeal of Flash which would be "Rugged American Individual goes to weird (and primitive, except for the spaceships) alien planets, shows them how incredible fucking awesome Rugged American Individuals are". Tell me you can't picture TEAM AMERICA's "America: Fuck Yeah!" playing behind any filmed Flash Gordon to date, right? Well, we'll see how that thread plays out, but I'm not optimistic on that. The rest of it I quite liked, though -- and that is a pretty awesome Ming, so, sure, I'll say this comic is a strong OK.

GAME OF THRONES #3: A lot of good choices in this adaptation, but the art's a little cutsie to work, I think. EH.

HAUNT #19: New Direction! Jump On Now! I thought the Kirkman/Capullo run was just too much trying to evoke a Spawny/Venomy kind of 90s feeling, but Joe Casey and Nathan Fox really change it up well here. I'm going to put the bulk of that on Fox, I think, as this looks pretty much the opposite of a Capullo comic. Solidly GOOD, though I can't say I would rush to buy another issue, necessarily.

STAR TREK ONGOING #3: Loving this, as well. Really, it's kind of a brilliant idea to adapt the old episodes with the new cast, they've got 150+ issues of material on tap, without having to generate a new story idea, yet they seem fresh because of the new dynamics among the characters. Solidly GOOD.

THUNDER AGENTS VOL 2 #1: A much better first issue than the last one -- action, AND plot movement, AND mysteries for the future AND soap opera is really the format that each issue of a super hero comic should deliver, and the first run had issues with only half or less of those in any average issue. Still, dang, in any incarnation of these characters, I'd have to say I think the appeal tended to be the artists drawing them (from Wood to Kane to Perez), and this is a writer-driven run, I think, from Nick Spencer. That's not to say that CAFU isn't fine (he [?] is), but not really in that same kind of weight class as many of the others. Ultimately, I kind of don't care about these guys outside of that art nostalgia, so you'd have to be exceptionally exceptional for me to say anything better than an OK on this. And while this is competently done, that's about it. If you have a jones for these guys, you'll probably rate this much higher than I.

THUNDERBOLTS #166: I'm going to kind of recycle the last few lines of the previous review for this -- this is competently done, but I have nothing emotionally invested in these characters, and this issue doesn't do anything to change that, so, sure, it is therefore kind of EH.

ULTIMATE COMICS ULTIMATES #4: First issue of the 4 that I liked on its own merits. I think this miscalculated on scale -- millions more dead, and this after the earlier devastation of New York... these things would dramatically change a world and how it operates, and it's exhausting as a reader to boot.  THIS issue seemed a lot more personally driven, and so worked for me much better. It's a low GOOD.

UNCANNY X-MEN #2: That's all weird, and not really very X-Men-y (though, yes yes, I get "new premise" and all; whatever, I stand by that assessment), and it doesn't suck, but it sure ain't for me. OK

WOLVERINE #19: I like Funny Jason Aaron, I think, better than All Serious one. Very enjoyable, low GOOD

X-MEN LEGACY #259: I feel like I can see the sets, and someone left the script pages in the shot, and no no no no, you're supposed to emote, dear! and it's just little stick figures being moved around, and it's no different than the rest of Carey's run, mostly, and I think its unfortunately pretty AWFUL. I almost upgraded that just so we wouldn't end this session on a down note, but ugh, can't do it.

Right, more tomorrow (I think!), what did YOU think?

-B

"...I'm Taking The Case." Comics! Sometimes They Aren't Older Than Your Grandad!

Here's an image from DAREDEVIL #4; a comic that isn't talked about within. But I just really, really wanted it up there so I indulged myself. I do go on about #5 of DAREDEVIL though. Is that alright? Are you sure? Because it matters to me!

Well, I can't promise to help but I did write some words about some comics that were actually published this Century. Yay me!

Oh yeah, one of the images may be NSFW, depends where you work, I guess?

DAREDEVIL #5 By Mighty Marcos Martin(a), Marvellous Mark Waid (w), Jaunty Javier Rodriguez(c) and Venerable VC's Joe Caramagna(l) (Marvel Comics, $2.99 (YES! TWO DOLLARS AND NINETY NINE CENTS NOT THREE DOLLARS AND NINETY NINE CENTS!)

"...but it's bee-yoo-ti-ful!"

If I said that this was probably the best book Marvel are belching out that probably wouldn't mean much since I don’t subject myself to much of their gassy blather. But the fact that everyone else who has ever picked the book up has said roughly the same might be an indication that it’s worth a look if you aren't already looking. Because it’s sure as sure can be that it’s worth looking at. Sockamagee, the art, oh the art, art as this there should be in comics all the time! Every page has something delightful on it and those are the lesser pages. It’s just excellent stuff that revels in all the possibilities that words and pictures reveal when used in concert. Rivera plainly loves comics and consequently his art rolls around in the medium like a dog in a cow pat. But there’s no shortage of people piling on the praise for the pictures so I thought I might at least extol the work of Mark Waid on writing. Because this is good stuff and, I feel, it gets overshadowed by the glories of the art.

"A hero acting heroically? Get outta town!"

It’s just super-solid all round and there’s a real danger of underrating that. Strong enough stuff to just shrug off that lame drivel about DD’s identity and turn it into a running gag. Better yet, for me at least, Mark Waid remembers the inherent awesome of fights’n’tights comics. There’s a bit in #5 where Waid solves the conundrum of how Daredevil would know he was being targeted by snipers so smartly, so gracefully, so obviously that I did, I admit, smile in admiration. By the time Waid topped it with the light switch gag I was full out snorting like a frisky pig. Corporate North American Mainstream Superhero comics don’t get any better than Daredevil by Mark Waid, Paolo Rivera and Marcos Martin because it is EXCELLENT!

CAPTAIN AMERICA AND BUCKY #620 By Cracking Chris Samnee (a), Everpresent Ed Brubaker and Middling Mark Andreyko(w), Bouncing Bettie Breitweiser (c), Victorious VC's Joe Caramagna(l) (Marvel Comics, $2.99)

Y’know I bet sometimes Bucky feels like a motherless child. Oh. He is. And Dad pegs it as well. Then his sister gets taken into care and he gets brutalised by the military until he is a killing machine That’s quite a lot of misfortune for one kid, personally I’m just glad he didn't have a dog. By which I mean I’m glad for the dog. Now I’m going to spoil the rest of this series for you because I reckon I can see where it’s going based on how things have gone so far.

"The laughs never start."

Crucially we never actually see Ma Bucky and Pa Bucky die and Little Sister Bucky’s fate is uncertain. This is comics, better yet this is Marvel Comics, so the clock is ticking until they return from “the dead”! Not only that but they too will have been turned into killing machines with bionic bits and bobs. Will the Winter Soldier survive against the most dangerous enemy of all – his own family?!? Yes. But they will all be reset to being nice (i.e. American not Russian, obviously) and together they will go “off the grid” and cross America finding warehouses in which they can talk in front of bits of machinery before narrating sad thoughts over some Steranko influenced action. Hey, Captain America can turn up every now and again and whine about how much paperwork he has to do while looking out of a window with his back to everyone. Even better each one will have their own series: Winter Soldier, Spring Soldier, Summer Soldier and Fall Soldier as well as the “core” book: The Four Deadly Seasons! Call me, Marvel! I can LOSE you money too! Oh, this comic has got technique but no life and is a total waste of Chris Samnee's excellence because it is EH!

(This book was pre-ordered before my delusional and smug decision not to give Marvel money for books featuring Jack Kirby characters until such time as they just acted decently towards The King's memory. This also applies to THE MIGHTY THOR. The point was not to spend less at my LCS and thus drive the elfin owner into the nightmarish world of working for someone else but to fulfill my obligations viz a viz pre-ordered comics and then spend the same amount on different stuff. No, I don't know why I'm explaining this to you. And now back to our regular programme...)

OMAC #2 By Kracking Keith Giffen and Dandy Dan Didio (w&a), Saucy Scott Koblish (a), Hunky Hi-Fi (c) and Tasty Travis Lanham (l) (DC Comics, $2.99)

I enjoyed the first issue of OMAC a great deal. In fact I enjoyed it so much that had I my druthers each successive issue would consist of OMAC appearing in the Cadmus complex and then running through it smashing stuff up until he got to the end and then disappearing. Yes, every issue would open with him reappearing and then running through the Cadmus complex smashing stuff up until he got to the end before disappearing. Every issue. Same page layouts, same panels, same characters in the panels. But! With every issue and every re-appearance the scenery would be more battered and the people more bruised. Over the course of the series the dialogue would degenerate from shocked exclamations to weary acceptance and right down to futile grunts. This would continue for about, say, 12 issues until OMAC was just running through an ever deepening trench littered with bones and metal. (Hey DC, Call me! I can lose YOU money!)

"Really? You look more like a "Larry" to me."

With issue 2 they don’t do that so what do they do? Well, it isn't Kirby let’s get that right “out there”!!! By the time Kirby birthed OMAC he had evolved beyond the merely mortal, having ascended to a plane whereby he could produce comics suffused with complexity and subtext that the man himself would have had trouble articulating. Reportedly not the most articulate of men Kirby was at his most articulate when he communicated via the medium of pencil and paper. With OMAC he was telling us of The Future. And the news from The Future wasn't good. The news from The Future is never good because in The Future you will be dead. Sorry about that. Worse than that Kirby’s OMAC told us that in The Future people would still be sh*theads and technology would simply give them exciting new ways to be such. But as long as there was someone willing to stand up and punch stuff until it stopped moving we’d be okay. The new OMAC isn't about The Future it’s about Now. Since stuff that’s about The Future is about Now anyway I guess that makes the new OMAC about The Past. And that’s clearest in the storytelling.

"Kids! How many storytelling techniques can you spot in this one panel!"

What we have here is pretty much any Hulk comic from the Bronze Age. By which I really mean how you remember any Hulk comic from the Bronze Age being. There’s a big old slobberknocker of a fight in which outlandish property damage is inflicted and much expositionary dialogue is spouted. Now, you may say there’s no place for such old-timey stuff in the brave new world of comics and I’d kind of see your point but I cannot deny the simple pleasure that this issue delivered. I don’t want to sound like some luddite berk living in the desert with locusts stuck in his beard but the fact remains that this style works. It delivers. And it isn't all Old School; the technicolour japescape of a colour job by Hi Fi looks like it was sourced from the still wet skins of alien jellyfish. It’s pretty good stuff, amiable entertainment that leaves you feeling entertained and amiable. I think the whole “I” for an “Eye” thing is bit too cute but I really liked “Omactivate!” so, you know, each to their own. There is some odd English in it too. Which is a bit rich coming from me but then I don’t have an Editor do I? But then, in a very real sense, does anyone in comics these days. Minor hiccups then and maybe not even that just a touch of reflux maybe? OMAC #2 is VERY GOOD! in any case.

PUNISHERMAX#18 By Swanky Steve Dillon(a), Jumpy Jason Aaron(w)and Matt Hollingsworth(c) (Marvel Comics, $3.99)

What a frustrating book this is. There have been some great moments as Frank’s monstrous nature is revealed in all its dark blankness but there’s some serious flaws. Just having Frank pop in or out of places like a magic fairy of death is jarring. It seems he can just waltz into the correctional facility hospital and pop his nut in Bullseye’s face. (Or a cap, I’m not strong on youth slang.) It undermines the good stuff when there’s such little attention paid to the plot. “And then I escaped…” isn't really a satisfactory way to end a prison arc, y’know. It’s all a bit odd because Aaron’s had plenty of room to tell his story (oh, look another three panels of someone leaving a room!) but it’s all a bit nebulous aside from the bits where Frank does something psychologically foul. These may be the more interesting parts to read simply because Aaron finds these the most interesting parts to write, all the other stuff gets a bit out of focus and vague. Unmemorable people in unmemorable rooms filling pages until Frank does something unforgivable isn't really convincing me that’s there’s much going on here. I mean there’s The Kingpin but he seems to be currently re-enacting some scenario from the letters pages of a psychopathic Razzle simply because he’s a bit bored. Oh, I know it’s the old thing about selling your soul to get what you want but then finding out it’s not; but it just looks like the Kingpin hasn't the wit to think of anything to do but drug and shag in his free time. Try cracking a book, man.

"Dammit, Kingpin baby, I (nnnhh!) almost (unnnh!) got there that time but you keep (uhhhh!) throwing me off (uhhh!) by callin me "Alan"!)

I don’t think matters are helped by Steve Dillon. Look, I like Steve Dillon, he’s a good artist but his action is too static, his backgrounds too vacant and his faces too caricatured to convince when applied to a serious story. Well, as serious a story as a story with The Punisher in can be. We’re not talking Ingmar Bergman here, folks, probably more Larry Cohen at best. At its worst it just seems like crude fan fiction involving the supporting cast of Frank Miller’s Daredevil run. I’m sure seeing Kingpin’s tubby bum as he slaps it to Elektra made someone’s day but it wasn't me and it wasn't today. At its best though it does seem to be saying something about fathers and men and stuff (oh, don’t worry, it’s nothing good. It’s never anything good.). Like I say it’s frustrating because if there was a bit more substance and a lot less sensationalism this would be better than OKAY!

SWAMP THING #2 By Yomping Yanick Paquette (a), Salty Scott Snyder(w), Naughty Nathan Fairburn(c) and Jesty John J. Hill(l) (DC Comics, $2.99)

Scott Snyder isn't the first person to tell us everything we know about Swamp Thing is wrong, but I doubt if anyone has ever done it as hamfistedley as this. The Parliament of Trees straight up send some mossy messenger to Alec Holland and he just plain tells Alec that everything he knows about Swamp Thing is wrong! Considering that the swampsters no longer talk in slow motion this takes him an incredibly long time. He uses a lot of words. So many words that he basically just wears Alec Holland down into believing him rather than actually says anything convincing. Holland clearly decides to believe Swamp Thing because life’s too short to listen any longer. Oh, and there’s also the biggest threat ever, ever, ever that has been around for ever, ever, ever but no one’s ever mentioned it before because. Just because. The woody courier then drops dead which is the price of his mission. I’m thinking the Parliament of trees want to maybe look into more effective means of communication. Then mad badness involving backwards headed people wakes the reader up, gainfully employs Paquette and dares to entertain for the latter part of the issue. This is slightly undercut when Abby turns up - but now she’s a bad-ass girl on a motorcycle! I hope the series isn't just going to end up with characters turning up but different! It’s Anton Arcane! But he’s a shoe salesman from Hoboken with a penchant for playing Toploader songs on the paper comb! It’s Chester but he has big ears! Nice art and some effective last-act nastiness but, really, the second issue seems a bit soon to fall into EH!

MIGHTY THOR#4 By Oval Olivier Coipel/Messianic Mark Morales(a), Melancholoy Matt Fraction(a), Lively Laura Martin(c) and Vitamin-enriched VC's Joe Sabino(l) (Marvel Comics, $3.99)

Ah, oh, it’s the usual bad cover version of a Thor comic. A hint of tit, a couple of “bastards” and some blood (when apparently some wolves get into Odin’s freezer. It isn't very clear what’s going on really.) seek to convince that this is  in some way more mature than those old Thor comics children (Haw! Children!) liked. Basically Thor hits The Silver Surfer in space. There’s some other stuff but it all seems mechanical and unconnected. Yes, predictably enough it’s another addition to the dismaying number of comics that probably sounded aces in interviews but, in reality, are staggeringly inadequate reading experiences. This seems to be working out okay for everyone though. (After all it’s only healthy to ignore reality and just stay positive about everything all the time.) I guess in the future there won’t actually be any comics, just interviews.

Interviews describing the most awesome comics ever; comics so awesome that to make them a reality would be just plain vulgar. There’ll be some personal stuff in there as well so that you feel connected to the interviewee with the uncomfortably shrill emotional content distracting from the cynical calculation underlying it all. After all what’s your USP? You, baby! You beautiful snowflake, you! They’ll have to be careful though, these writers of the future, it’s a fine line between being compared to Dave Eggers and being compared to Dave Pelzer. I don’t mind as they are the writers and being writers they are The Shining Ones and those that dare to raise a voice in criticism (burn them!) are nothing but Haters fuelled by resentment and jealousy. And it’s true. Christ, sometimes I wake up with my face wet with tears because I didn’t end up writing Thor comics. I wasn't hungry enough.  I failed the world. I am the filth of the earth. And all that’s fine, I mean it isn't like this pallid thing cost $3.99 is it? It did? Oh, those writers can get stuffed then. I’m sure everyone involved in this was a truly special human being but that doesn't stop it being EH!

AVENGERS 1959 #2 By Hirsute Howard Chaykin (w/a), Jolly Jesus Arbutov(c) and Jingoistic Jared K. Fletcher(l) (Marvel Comics, $2.99)

(Yes, I am aware Nick Fury was created by Jack Kirby but Howard Victor Chaykin needs his Mai Tai mix and who am I to deny him?)

Kind of typed myself into a corner haven’t I? In trying to course correct the critical conversation concerning Howard Victor Chaykin I may have erred a little on the enthusiastic side. (“Ya think, you limey asshat, huh, ya think?”) Now I imagine no one will believe me when I say that this second issue is even better than the first issue and the first issue was nice stuff to start with. Any rational human being would be forgiven for dismissing me as the kind of guy who had Howard Victor Chaykin pooped in a brown paper bag I’d pay for the privilege of a peek. I wouldn't though and I think that kind of nasty talk tells us more than enough about where your mind goes when no-one’s watching. For most of the issue the art is really, really sweet. The colouring is greatly improved and makes everything more visually coherent and there are some strong holding lines going on which I like. I was particularly enamoured of The Blonde Phantom’s hair.

"Oh, Howard Victor Chaykin! Don't you ever change!"

The last few pages get a bit choppy but by this point the events are getting pleasingly goofy so it’s not a dealbreaker. Baron Blood and Brain Drain? From Rascally Roy and Frisky Frank Robbins’ sweat drenched INVADERS run? By Howard Victor Chaykin? Man, that’s some daft stuff I’m liking. And on the last page when Howard Victor Chaykin basically introduces John Steed into the Marvel Universe I’m kind of starting to warm to the idea of looking in that bag. I guess you could say it’s Howard Victor Chaykin by numbers but I've run the numbers and Howard Victor Chaykin’s numbers look pretty good. AVENGERS 1959 #2 is witty, smart, saucy, fast-moving entertainment and it’s my fault but your loss that you won’t believe me when I say it’s VERY GOOD!

Remember, Kids, if you only buy one of these - buy DAREDEVIL because it is pure COMICS!!!

EXTRA BONUS DAREDEVIL PICTURE FROM ISSUE 4:

Criminy, just buy it already! Now go have a nice weekend!

Wait, What? Ep. 61.1: Same As It Ever Was....

(And look where my hand was.)

Hey, we are back! After a pleasant two week respite, Graeme McMillan and I have returned with the first installment of Wait, What? Episode 61. And as you can see, we have a nifty new piece of fanart to bring along with us, courtesy of the awesomely talented Garrett Berner (who some of us also know on Twitter as The Mighty Gar).

Well, that's all fine and good, you say, but what about the podcast?  And I am happy to report it should already be up on iTunes and making its way back into your heart, like it had never left, just like some kind of ringworm or intestinal parasite.  And in it, we answer your questions from Twitter, email, and the website, with topics like Daredevil #5, Legion Lost #2, Luther and Justified, Flash #2, Justice League Dark #2, Casanova: Avarita #2, Fear Itself #7, Occupy Oakland, and Marvel's business practices. (The latter of which continues into Part 2 but I had to break up the conversation somewhere...)

If this sounds like the sort of thing that interests you, by all means jump in and  start listening right here if you fancy:

Wait, What? Ep. 61.1: Same As It Ever Was

Part 2 is right around the corner, and it has us getting to (a few) of the many questions posed to us on Graeme's recent post, as well as the announcement of the winners of our latest contest.  We hope you come back for it!

And, as always, thanks for listening!

Wait, What? Ep. 58.2: A Set of Steak Knives

No idea. No idea. I remember I had some brilliant idea about the image to go with this episode and it's just...gone. Thought I wrote it down and everything. Fortunately, I still feel comfortable ganking images from Mr. Tim at the amazing Our Valued Customers. In fact, this wasn't even the image I'd planned to use but I jumped over there and thought this was brilliant enough to disseminate widely.

(Man, those two words seem pervy next to one another. "Disseminate widely." Brrrrgh.)

So no, be warned, we do not talk Big Bang Theory on this latest not-quite-forty-minutes-and-therefore-is-considered-wee-by-our-standards installment of Wait, What? But Graeme and I do talk Green Lantern Corps, Birds of Prey, Daredevil #4, Witch Doctor #3, LoSH #1, Captain Atom, the original Legion Lost, X-Men: Schism #4, and some thoughts on buying digital.

Also, we are holding a fantastic contest with amazing prizes. Well, okay, it's a "prize" actually, and your working defintion of "amazing" will have to be pretty loose but....hey, we read superhero comics in 2011! Our definition of "amazing" is pretty darn flexible, right? Listen in and enter!

This teeny-tiny podcast, incapable of being seen by the naked eye, is already floating through coursing bloodstream of iTunes. Or, alternately, you could shrink yourself, Raquel Welch and a kick-ass submarine down to microscopic size and view it through your auditory canals here:

Wait, What? Ep. 58.2: A Set of Steak Knives

As always, we thank you for listening and hope you have el viaje fantástico!

Wait, What? 57.1: Ones Divided by Two

Howdy, everyone. My apologies in advance for such a rushed entry, but I'm actually taking a break from editing 57.2 and my concentration is a little bit on the "shot" side of things. Although I'm very happy San Francisco has decided to grace us with some lovely, lovely weather, my apartment is too hot in a "why doesn't my brain work?" kind of way. (Now I know how the rest of the U.S. felt this summer...)

Anyhoo, Wait, What? 57.1! It's very nearly an hour, and Graeme McMillan and I discussing not only the Miles Morales-based Ultimate Spider-Man #1 and the subime Daredevil #3, but also New 52 books like Deathstroke #1 ( with some spoilers), Red Lantern #1, Frankenstein, Agent of S.H.A.D.E. #1, Demon Knights #1, Suicide Squad #1, Green Arrow #1 and Justice League International #1, as well as discussion about the August estimated sales numbers from ICV2.  Also! A delicious waffles update!

[I feel like I should cue the Entertainment Tonight theme music here.]

Sensible lads and lasses undoubtedly uncovered this installment already on iTunes, but the rest of us can listen right here, right now:

Wait, What? Ep. 57.1: Ones Divided by Two

You'll be happy to now the gripping finale is right around the corner, and, as always, we thank you for listening!

Wait, What? Ep. 53.1: Why Are They Smiling?

I kinda like that I've decided to call this installment, "Why Are They Smiling?" and I have a this illustration of someone asking "Why are they smiling?" and also maybe someone says it in the very podcast, too. It's a bit like "Merv Griffin!", that most excellent Milk & Cheese cartoon, and it's a bit like that "turtles all the way down" meme, and a bit like that faux-Jack T. Chick Cthulhu strip, and it's a bit like I have headache and can't really think of anything especially subtle. So.

Due to said headache, I will skip the program notes which I've been trying to add (not really sure if they're helping anyone or not, anyway) and, hmmm, maybe I just need a banana or something to eat. Maybe it's a blood sugar thing. Yes. Existential blood sugar.

But don't let my hypoglycemia throw you: this is actually a mighty fine installment of Wait, What? we've got lined up for you. In it, Graeme McMillan and I reflect on Fear Itself #5, and Marvel's plans for its post-Fear Itself future; Flashpoint #4, Flashpoint: The Secret Seven, and Flashpoint: The Outsider; X-Men: Schism, Wolverine #13, PunisherMax #16 as well as the work of Jason Aaron; and the truly enjoyable Daredevil #2. It should be on iTunes, and it is most definitely here for you to listen to:

Wait, What? Ep. 53.1: Why Are They Smiling?

Oh, and I mentioned it there, so I mentioned it here--should you wish to drop us an email at waitwhatpodcast@gmail.com and send us comics or waffle-related gossip, we would certainly love to read it.  Mmmm, waffles...those have got to be better for your blood sugar than a banana, right?

Anyway, Ep. 53.2 should be here very, very shortly so there's always that.  My hope is that I'll have eaten by then.  Oh, and as always, thanks for listening!

Wait, What? Ep. 50.1: The Devil, We Say

Yes, here we have it--Wait, What?'s fiftieth episode, filled with talk by Graeme McMillan and Yours Truly about Daredevil #1, the Defenders relaunch, Incognito and creator expectation in comics, Jim Starlin and Jim Shooter, Alan Moore's Captain Britain, and our usual ephemera jammed into just over an hour.

And since I've been told that "context" is this year's big buzzword among podcasters as the number one thing listeners would like, lemme point you toward this post by Jim Shooter in particular, and this interview with Ed Brubaker as things what might help in capturing this mythical "context" creature.

(Also, it should be pointed out that, despite the title and the graphic up top we didn't talk nearly enough about Daredevil #1, and it's really pretty great and you should go get yourself a copy if you haven't already.)

Savvy souls can find the latest installment on iTunes, or you can also give it an auditory gander here:

Wait, What? Ep. 50.1: The Devil, We Say

And, I should also note, installment 50.2 is right around the corner.  Thanks for putting up with us for 50 or so episodes, and we hope you'll stick with us for many more.

"Hey, Title that Post, Hibbs!" -- stuff from 7/20

Two Comics, and a Film!Let's start with the film, shall we?  

CAPTAIN AMERICA: THE FIRST AVENGER: I thought this was a fun and charming little movie, largely living up to the promise of the trailer. Cap, himself, is somewhat one-dimensional -- he doesn't have the drunken insouciance of Iron Man, or the charming arrogance of Thor, just a lot of earnestness -- but Chris Evans plays Cap with all of his heart, and sells it well.

(If you know nothing whatsoever about Cap the character, then there might be SPOILERS below, but I'm going to assume you know the basics?)

Like THOR before it, as long as you don't go in expecting more than popcorn fun, you'll get it, and this time leavened with a direct moral message of how important it is to stand up to bullies.

While the move from Nazis to Hydra was slightly disappointing from a purist POV, it did allow us to get Big! Mad! Science! everywhere. It's hecka revisionistic, but it yielded a fun movie, so all is well.

The script has a few problems: I really had a hard time understanding why Steve was staying in costume in the field, after the first time (and, heh, that scene of "early costume" Cap sneaking into the Hydra base was rendered pretty funny with that giant flag strapped to his back), and I thought they did a really bad handling the transition from '40s to c21 -- Ben turned to me immediately and asked me "What do they mean, 'you've been asleep for 70 years'?" "Well, Ben, he got frozen in a block of ice for all of that time" "How, daddy?" And, yeah, it sure ain't on the screen.

Also, as long as I'm complaining, the staggeringly multi-culti Howling Commandos kind of freaked me out, in the same way THOR's Warriors Three did... plus, historical accuracy and Sam Jackson's race aside, Nick Fury really should be leading them, damn it! And, uh, was Jim Morita talking into a modern operator's headset in that scene?

But then there were the swell and fun easter eggs -- did you spot the Human Torch on display at the World's Fair? How about the Red Skull's translation to Bifrost? That brilliant first, foreshadowing, shot of Arnim Zola? The filmmakers know their Marvel comics, and it shows.

I'm also kind of crazy excited for AVENGERS, now, which is maybe a terrible idea knowing that low expectations is one of the reasons I have dug THOR and CAP so much. Ben loved CAP, too -- gave it his usual "10 out of 10!", though he rates them: THOR, IRON MAN, CAP. I think I vote for IRON MAN, CAP, THOR, though.

Anyway, liked it a lot: VERY GOOD.

DAREDEVIL #1: Let me get one thing out of the way first: Marvel pretty much ruined Matt Murdock with "Shadowland", and it would take a lot of hard work, time, and redemption to get him back to anything resembling a sympathetic protagonist again.

Or you could just "pull a DC" and basically just ignore all of that, and then make it such a fun and entertaining story than cynical old farts like me have their Charm Barrier broken, so we grumble and say "OK, you get away with it... this time!" (rassen frassen Mark Waid!)

A lot of the credit really needs to be given to Paolo Rivera and Marco Martin, two dynamic artists with such strong individual styles, yet who flow well from one to the other.

I'll tell you something else, as well -- I'm usually leery about letting Ben reading my current comics, there's a ton of content that he's just not ready for in modern comics, but when he asked if DD was appropriate for him, I assented pretty quickly. And he was ENRAPTURED by the book, reading it very closely for quite some time. Then he went downstairs and told mom all about it "...So, see, he's BLIND, but he's got this wicked RADAR SENSE...")

Yeah, that was an EXCELLENT comic book.

INVINCIBLE IRON MAN #506: You know when I read the scene with Stark's sacrifice in FEAR ITSELF, I thought "Wow, that's a great moment", but this issue's fully-fleshed out version really kind of wore on me -- I found the foul-mouthed dwarves to be really overdone (and that thing about "content that I wouldn't want my son to see yet" from up above? Yeah), and then when the issue ends the way it ends, well, I just thought it was too easy. I also was really troubled with not having Tony deal with the aftermath of Paris personally. I don't know, I kind of realized that I haven't really liked this book at all in months (since #500, I guess?) I'll go with a very low EH.

That's me, this week: what did YOU think?

-B

Marvel's Best And Worst: Graeme Looks At Comics From 7/13, 7/20

It's been awhile, but that's because of too much work/vacation/too much work, respectively. But! Finally! Comics! Well, some of them, anyway. DAREDEVIL #1: I dropped the previous version of this title midway through Ed Brubaker's run, because it was just too dark for me (I read the collection of Shadowland the other week, and saw that I'd probably made the right decision), so the idea that Matt Murdock would essentially have to choose to actively try to be happy in this new series would've made me interested, even without the creative team of Mark Waid, Paolo Rivera and Marcos Martin. But with them, it's just amazing: Waid's script is smart, funny and tight, and both Rivera and Martin just make the book sing with their art. An Excellent debut, and I can't wait for the second issue.

GREEN LANTERN # 67, WAR OF THE GREEN LANTERNS AFTERMATH #1: It may have been ridiculously delayed and come out in a strangely paced form - although, admittedly, one that makes much more sense once you've read the first issue of the spin-off Aftermath series - but there's something about Lantern #67 that works, despite itself. Geoff Johns is at his best playing with these characters, and making them part of a ridiculously melodramatic story with weirdly compelling, slightly disturbing subtext, I think, and Doug Mahnke's art can make almost anything look good on the page. I kind of wish that he'd had time to stick around for Aftermath #1, which... isn't bad, necessarily (It's better than writer Tony Bedard's GLCorps run to date, I'd argue), but is let down by the art that kills the story by filling it with stiffly-posed, emotionless figures that bring everything to a halt (Blame Tyler Kirkham, whose half of the book is by far the worst). It's a shame, because there's a lot in the writing that I like, particularly the idea that the Guardians essentially fired Hal because they're scared of him, as well as the whole Corps being told to have a day off, more or less, because they're all in shock. If Bedard could get another artist for his New Guardians book come September, this might've been enough to get me to pick it up, but sadly, he's sticking with Kirkham. Lantern: Good, Aftermath: Okay.

SUPERMAN #713: Dear DC - I can't believe you're not letting Chris Roberson stay with this character after the reboot, especially when he gives you issues like this that demonstrate that he really, really loves the character and is doing his best to save the book from the depths of mundanity that JMS took it to. I'll admit that there's almost nothing Portland-y about this trip to Portland, OR - Clark goes to a Sundollar coffee shop, and not Stumptown? Bad show, Mr. Kent - but I loved the various suggested tales to illustrate why there "must be" a Superman. Having Jamal Igle show up with some nice art didn't hurt, either. Good, even if it'll all end in tears next month.

ULTIMATE FALLOUT #1-2: Talking of ending in tears... Am I the only person who thought that the first issue of this felt like it was created to be Ultimate Spider-Man #161? It was more enjoyable than the last few issues of that title, if "enjoyable" is the right word - Brian Michael Bendis provided the emotional punch that "The Death of Spider-Man" lacked, and Mark Bagley... well, he does his best to keep up, at least. The second issue, though, was a mess in comparison, split between three different creative teams and seeming like it: there's no cohesion or connection between the interludes, and it reads like someone's put together a preview book of excerpts instead of something that's supposed to be a story in and of itself. #1 was Good, but #2 pretty much Awful - and that's before I get to pointing out that Bryan Hitch's Ultimate Thor has become Chris Helmsworth thanks to the movie, and then wonder why a comic costing $3.99 only has nineteen pages of story.

But that's enough about me. What did you think?

Abhay: "3 Jacks" by Ann Nocenti, David Aja, Matt Hollingsworth, and Chris Eliopoulos

So, “3 Jacks”—pretty much the best Marvel comic of the year so far, right? Tim O’Neil agrees; I agree; I don’t know who else has weighed in. “3 Jacks” is a 13-page back-up feature in DAREDEVIL #500, created by Ann Nocenti, David Aja, Matt Hollingsworth and Chris Eliopoulos. The rest of the comic is inert; not worth anyone’s time. But: “3 Jacks,” everybody! Where do we start? Well, let’s start with the first page.

The opening panel: buildings in silhouette, with the Coney Island Parachute Jump tower above the skyline. I don’t know much about the Parachute Jump tower, but: at the angle chosen, the way Aja draws it, does it resembles a cross to you?

Our metal-crucifix is located dead center on the page, not off to the side, not one detail of many—dead center. Flanking it, we have two panels: one, a woman praying in silhouette; the other, a man yelling “Keep ‘Im Close, Damn It” to the heavens. Both characters point in direct lines towards the cross; both are talking to God in their own way.

(Maybe that's something representative of Nocenti’s run on DAREDEVIL in general-- an absurdly straight-faced religious image on one end of a teeter-totter, with an almost-corny image straight out of Will Eisner keeping it in balance? Maybe; not for me to say: a handful of issues of her DAREDEVIL run made an impression on me, but I don’t think I’ve ever read that entire run tip-to-toe. I have no claims to being an expert on the Nocenti run, and this essay will unfortunately be limited as such).

The other panels? A small set of visual jokes: (i) a panel of a bullseye but with no way of telling if it's from the villain's mask or the poster with “Live Human Target” scrawled on it; (ii) a poster for the “Human Blockhead” a panel away from Daredevil being struck in the head; (iii) my favorite is the word “Clone” cut off from the window of what we’re later told is the “Cyclone Bar”—I don’t know if that’s a joke by David Aja & Chris Eliopoulos on Aja’s appropriation of Dave Mazzucchelli’s style circa 1980-whatever, but I’d like to think Aja & Eliopoulos were being self-deprecating.

* * *

So we open with a distant steel God towering over moments solemn, and silly, and empty, and violent, with a man in a devil costume as far from God on the page as can be (his arms also akimbo though). Fine; that’s nice. How does the comic end? Does Daredevil win the spiritual battle the first page sets out? Well: let’s skip to the end! Here’s the last panel:

Again, we see the Parachute Tower but the angle is different. The skyline is higher—and the man in the devil costume is now at the center of page, the city on one end of him, the crucifix on the other, restored to equilibrium, in balance with his environment … though there’s still a gap between him and that crucifix, still that gap. He’s almost a silhouette like the rest of his environment, but no, not quite—colorist Matt Hollingsworth makes sure there’s still just that tiniest hint of red. A little taint of sin that’s not washing off, a little bit of the devil costume peeking through.

Is that last panel a spoiler? No: because that panel in fact is shown on the page immediately preceding the story.

The story of 3 Jacks is there’s a fight between Bullseye and Daredevil at the Coney Island amusement park, and then that fight ends and Daredevil runs off into the night. The end.

But the way that story is structured is this: we start with the end of the fight, the story goes beyond the end of the fight as we watch Daredevil recover from the fight with two people who have witnessed the fight, Larry and Gina. Larry, Gina and Daredevil then talk about the middle of the fight which we see in flashback (we never see the beginning of the fight; the beginning of the fight doesn’t matter—Daredevil and Bullseye will always be fighting).

When we finally reach the ending? We wind up back where we started from-- like I said: the last image of the story is the same image as on the page literally preceding the story itself. It’s like a spiral.

The comic is about a character trapped in a spiral of violence, not explicitly but in the form the story is presented. Daredevil has no way out of that spiral-- the only thing his story can ever be about is the process of Daredevil picking himself up and running into battle again. Not just a spiral of violence: maybe one way to look at the story is it's about how Daredevil is in a loop of constantly being knocked out of spiritual alignment and struggling to restore his relationship with his faith.

So, wait: I'm making "3 Jacks" sound like a totally boring bummer about, like, Jesus or something, aren't I? It's not that. You get to see Daredevil use his radar powers and his lie-detecting powers. Daredevil kicks Bullseye in the face. Daredevil fights Bullseye throughout the comic. The Marvel comics goods are delivered in those 13 pages, besides everything else that’s going on. And by David Aja, Matt Hollingsworth and Chris Eliopoulos, no less. Silent pages, silhouette flashbacks, heartbeat scrawls, graphic shapes, extreme close-ups on big-wide-open eyes, etc. Aaah, comics, everybody…

Plus: I just like Larry and Gina, the two witnesss I mentioned before, the praying girl and the yelling guy from the first page. They represent aspects of Daredevil’s father and mother. But besides that? They’re just funny characters in their own right. There’s comic business with a hammer; the 10 Commandments are re-written; Larry and Gina have interesting things to say for themselves. It’s not an extraordinary amount of characterization. It’s a Daredevil comic, and Larry & Gina are stock comic book characters—“precocious schoolgirl” and “washed-up boxer” don't exactly break new ground. But, you know: they’re really not the worst company you could ask for from a Marvel comic. The lead story of the issue is about ninjas screaming at each other; I’m happy to stick with Larry and Gina instead.

* * *

The heart of the comic is Bullseye has thrown three photos into Daredevil’s chest, saying “Dead Center! You just don’t’ know it yet” as he did so.

The three photos turn out to be meaningful to Daredevil—to the reader, too, if they knows their Daredevil “lore.” If they can put images into context.

Which: I mean, that’s kind of writing comics right there, isn’t it? You pick out still images, little bits of the past frozen in time, and you throw them into another person, hope they stick…? If Ann Nocenti is a character in this story, she’s not the old yelling-guy or the praying girl or the distant steel God; she’s Bullseye. She can’t kill Daredevil—all she can do is hurt him as much as she can. “Dead Center! You just don’t know it yet.” She’s sort of bragging about how good a job she’s doing in the story itself, man. Shit, I kind of dig that.

* * *

There’s more: Daredevil, Larry and Gina are all dealing with their relationships with their parents (which I’m thinking might possibly be metaphorical); Daredevil is "saved" by the prayers of a girl who “hates God” and Larry pleading to a cross to "Keep 'Im Close"; that fantastic page of Gina lying to Daredevil (if I understood the concept of grace, let alone cared, maybe I’d have something to say there); the final images of Larry with a hammer in his hands, which… carpentry? Isn’t that something? You know: from the Bible or Jesus or one of those? Or wait: maybe I’m thinking of that show HOME IMPROVEMENT? Maybe "3 JACKS" is actually a metaphor for how men are pigs HARF HARF HARF (am I right, ladies?). It’s 13 pages, but I'll be damned if it isn't a dense fucker.

Tim O'Neil concluded his review by stating "If Marvel publishes a better story this year I'll eat my hat." I'll go one better: if Marvel publishes a better story this year, Tim O'Neil will eat every article of clothing in my closet, at gunpoint. It's your move, MARVEL DIVAS. Winner takes O'Neil.

* * *

MISCELLANEOUS NOTES ABOUT THE REST OF THE ISSUE:

** Some crap about ninjas, again...?

** What’s the story with Billy Tan’s pages here? They're not professional-quality comic pages. If I had to guess, I’d guess they’d lined up a real talent for this List comic, but the real talent blew it, something came up, Ashton Kutcher's next movie needed a hovercraft designed, whatever; yaddah yaddah yaddah, some editor goes to Tan at the last minute and asked him to rush out pages. That would be my guess what happened, if I had to make a guess. That would be as nice a thing as I could say about Billy Tan's work here: maybe an editor forced him to do that. Or an alternate theory: maybe someone lost a bet. You know, like one of those TRADING PLACES bets. Maybe someone bet Don Ameche $1 that if they gave Billy Tan a real comic book artist's job, he would start to draw like a real comic book artist. Don Ameche won that one; Don Ameche's the big winner. Except... except for the being dead part. Don Ameche: no longer with us. Great in HEAVEN CAN WAIT. But very, very dead. But dead and one U.S. dollar richer, so who's laughing? Well, not Don Ameche. He's dead. I mean, it's kind of a bummer if you think about it, Don Ameche being dead, or just death in general. That's nothing to laugh about. That's sad, really. He was really great in HEAVEN CAN WAIT. It's all just so temporary. We'll never know how Don Ameche would have spent his Billy Tan dollar. You know, this all seemed like a very simple joke at first, but fucker sort of got away from me, I don't know what to tell you...

** The Brubaker DAREDEVIL run ended in the issue. For me, and this is completely unfair, but: that run was like watching air rush out of a balloon. It started so well with that prison arc, but—and this is the unfair part: Mr. Fear…? NO, THANK YOU. As soon as Mr. Fear showed up, I split. How unfair is that? I’ll read all manners of crap, just the crappiest crap that ever crapped, without complaint, happy as can be, but: “Mr. Fear? No, no: fuck you. Daredevil was better back when he fought the guy who was like an Owl, but I am not putting up with this Mr. Fear horse-shit. Fuck you, God!” What a terrible job it is to write mainstream comics. How could Ed Brubaker or anyone conceivably see that I’d draw the line super-arbitrarily at Mr. Fear? There’s no earthly way Ed Brubaker could ever guess that in a million years. And yet: I blame him anyways.

** The last Ed Brubaker comic I read was that new Captain America thing where it was all “Hey, Captain America—we have to get you back to the island using the Constant Sawyer Hurley.” Which was a nice comic, but I remember thinking, “Hey, maybe Ed Brubaker watches that show LOST.” And then Daredevil #500—was it just me or did his story have an identical flashback structure to the season finale of LOST? It was probably written before the finale—or maybe, but…? Am I just seeing things? It's probably just a coincidence. I’m probably just seeing things. Still: I hope the next issue of CRIMINAL explains what that crazy smoke monster is. Smoke monster is my favorite character.

** Or here’s a theory: maybe the night before his pages were due, Billy Tan was walking down a street when he saw a psychotic clown trying to rape a little kid. And he was like, “Get off that kid, Bozo! I’ll make you a sad clown. WITH MY BILLY TAN FISTS.” And then they fought, like bare-knuckles, all night long, man versus clown, and yeah, Billy Tan named his fists after himself, but I think that’s manly, why not. (The clown in this story symbolizes the Buddha on the road; I learned it from reading you, Ann Nocenti). And he wins in the end, Billy Tan wins and saves the kid from being clown-molested, but the price is DARK LIST pages you can look at without feeling sadness in your eyeballs. But that’s a small price to pay. Maybe we all owe Billy Tan an apology. He very well might be a hero to children everywhere, including the child inside all of us. The child inside all of us that is deathly afraid of a clown touching our peener without consent.

** Wait, wait: if Disney owns ABC, and ABC has LOST on it, does that mean Marvel comics kind of does own the Smoke Monster? Smoke Monster's my favorite character.

** Why did Lynn Varley’s colors get destroyed in the reprint? What happened there? The issue I remember seeing had these dark, moody colors. The colors in the reprint—what a bright, shiny, happy comic about Russian Roulette. “It’s the feel good Russian Roulette comic book of the year.” Is that how it looked when it was originally printed? Maybe I'm so used to seeing the old, worn-out, grey, torn-up copies that I never imagined what it looked like when it was brand new. Same exact thing happens when I look at your mom, naked. When she's having sex with Don Ameche's ghost. Dammit. Goddammit. Oh, I shouldn't have even tried; couldn't let it go. Goddammit, I really thought I could save the whole Don Ameche thing, in the eleventh hour, and it's just-- where's the goddamn Cocoon when you need it? Don Ameche Joke Cocoon, you have failed me for the last time!! This started out so earnestly, with the crucifix and the Jesus and the spirals, and ... What happened, Internet? If only keyboards came with delete keys...

The Wire Holds My Jaw In Due To A Wallet Chain Removing The Gum That Holds Normal Lower Jaws In

Still adrift in the sea of figuring out how to carve a niche for myself amongst the Savage Critics sea of talent, a task made that much worse ever since The Hibbsnation 2000 vetoed my proposed 27 part multimedia series "Fantasy Tales Involving Chris Eckert Coating The Chest Of Sean Collins in Warm Peanut Oil," but unwilling to break for the beckoning seas of non-participation, I, you're friendly Can O' Spinach, thought it might be best to just dive in and "punch the keys" as if I was a poor kid trying to get through private school on something besides my amazing free throw skillz. Lay down all your burdens, unbuckle your pants, throw on Japan's Adolescent Sex: this was the best single issue comic I read on March 4th, and it's going to take me about 9 paragraphs before I get to the point where I mention what it is. Ed Brubaker's career of late hasn't, for my money, had a lot of misfires. His work on Captain America is arguably one of the tightest usages of long-range plotting currently available in any serialized comic, his collaborations with Sean Phillips have resulted in one of the most seamless storytelling partnerships in contemporary comics, and his willingness to keep his feet squarely planted in both creator-owned work as well as the corporate stuff that keeps his name in the minds of buyers point to a guy who knows what the hell he's doing with his career. (Unfortunately, he's been known to read this site, so it should be clear that, while I enjoy his work, I don't particularly like him as a person, because he wears a hat, and everybody knows that hat-wearers are inherently contemptible people deserving of disdain. Hats. Ugh. For peasants, really.)

Most praise, including any I might have given in the past, is usually focused on how his stuff is so tightly constructed, how the stories he tells--especially the genre ones--often spin through twisting, labyrinthine plots that consistently ratchet up the tension of while subtly tricking the reader into believing that a climax is right around the corner. It's the necessary trick of super-hero comics these days--the need to tell something strong, compelling, and yet never get around to actually playing out a true ending. With work like Captain America--a nearly 40 issue story that luckily dovetailed with the willingness of Marvel Comics to retire the Steve Rogers version of the character for a time--Brubaker found easy fans in people like me. I came to the book only because of my appreciation for his previous work on Catwoman, Gotham Central and Sleeper, and this, coupled with an absolute zero relationship with Captain America (ignoring that Amalgalm Age thing where they crossed Steve Rogers with Blue Beetle and Mannix), made for a willingness to buy into whatever he had to offer. Sure, it wouldn't have worked if I hadn't ended up enjoying the comics as well, which are a sort of combination of Steranko's Fury with the addition of a brutal, almost overwhelming sadness. But it does work, and it's damn good stuff on an aggregate basis.

Daredevil was a tougher one: it's a comic that's always been either wildly good or absolutely horrible, and its damn good runs include Frank Miller and David Mazzuchelli's solemn Born Again saga, as well as the years of punishment wreaked upon the character by the previous-to-Brubaker team of Brian Michael Bendis and Alex Maleev. Unlike Captain America--actually, unlike all the Brubaker stuff I've previously enjoyed--I do have some love for a few of the character's stories. I'm not coming at this one naked, covered in my mother's slime. I'm a...shit. Shit, I like this comic, don't I?

The rules for good Daredevil are pretty well laid out. Either bring something that's really hell-on-wheels intense, or watch it get filed alongside the goof-tastic retardation that was the period where Matt Murdock dressed like a Go-Bot while the Kingpin ate out of a trash can. And you know what? Brubaker's run has been a rough go at times. Daredevil's history is a tough one to manage, even when you only pay heed to the better stories--Matt's girlfriends are constantly getting lit on fire, murdered, or chucked into wells, Matt himself is about as broody as you can get before somebody brings up Young Werther and bad indie comics, and, with only a few exceptions (Kingpin & Bullseye) the rogue's gallery has a serious case of weak sauce.

It hasn't helped that the dude was saddled with the Bendis/Maleev climax, which, if you don't remember, was when the main character of a super-hero book got thrown into prison. (And if dealing with morons is your thing, it's notable that some people at the time were actually internet-style upset because that meant that they weren't going to see Daredevil wear his Daredevil costume. Apparently some people actually sit around flipping through comics angry when the people doing the punching aren't wearing spandex outfits more often than they wear cotton and linen based clothing.) Brubaker spent his time--more time than might have actually been required--tying off the various loose ends of the Bendis/Maleev run, successfully introduced his old Gotham Central partner Michael Lark as the new artist, and eventually got around to telling new stories. For whatever reason, those new stories read like remixes of the old ones--people went after the women in Matt Murdock's life, he defended an innocent man and worked to redeem hard-case criminals, Foggy was fat and whiny, crybaby sex was had, somebody got pushed in front of a train. Honestly, if it hadn't been such a tight art/story partnership, and if Brubaker had ever experimented with the current Marvel vogue of having their stock-serious characters wink their way throughout the silly repetition of it all, the comics wouldn't even be classed alongside the same team's previous work.

Anyway. March 4th comic, right? How long is this thing? Too long, right? Ah, whatever. You'll figure out who you should read out of the new Savage crew soon enough.

Michael Lark doesn't handle the art for Daredevil # 116. While he's missed, he's backed up by the extraordinarily good David Aja. Take a look at this, which reminds me of that Takeshi Kitano where he hangs out with the kid and never kills anybody:

And in case you're wondering if he did any of the sort of design work that helped the covers of The Immortal Iron Fist to stand out amongst the sea of B-list character comics that nobody with sense usually pays attention too, he did, and it looked like this: First things first: Daredevil only shows up once in this comic, and only because he happens to be mentioned in brief. This issue is all Wilson Fisk, out trying to make good on the promise he made to Matt Murdock to "honor" the wishes of Wilson's deceased wife Vanessa, those wishes being...look, her dead lady specifics don't matter. She wanted Willy to stop killing people and being a monster, that's what he's trying to do, and he's trying to do it by brooding in some rainswept area in Spain after hanging out in Switzerland's graveyards failed to do the trick. He meets a lady, she has kids, she's not grossed out by the prospect of dating a beached sperm whale, he's able to keep himself from strangling the locals because she smiles at him...it's all well and good standard genre type stuff. Since it's a Daredevil comic, it has ninjas, and since it's a Brubaker comic, the ninjas actually kill people as opposed to not killing them. Yes, like most single issue super-hero comics, you can probably figure out the big ending yourself long before you get there, especially if you looked at the cover, which says "Return of the King Part One." Pat yourself on the head, you brilliant sage: you've figured out how serialized genre stories work. I bet you get upset when Dexter Morgan doesn't get caught during season finales.

But here's the thing about Daredevil # 116, or at least "here's the thing" as I see it: this thing is VERY GOOD. It's just a flawlessly put together comic, and even the stuff that we're all sort of sick of--like killing woman to teach a lesson, or the 400th Marvel comic to open by teasing the ending--is so clean, so well paced and coherent to the story it's telling, and the art is so attractive that those minor complaints become actual strengths. Of course the story opens with the ending. The story isn't about whether or not Wilson Fisk has to start killing again, that's something Brubaker knows full well can't possibly be told in a dynamic, tense fashion, and he doesn't feel like having to do the 800th version of that story anyway. It's a done deal: Wilson's a monster. Sure, he's also a complicated, complex man, a criminal with an extensive history, he's a person who's suffered emotional and physical trauma, but those days of complicated emotional problems, of who he is--those days are over, they're long gone. He's gone so far inside his own forest of pain, power and rage that the idea that he could live long enough to make his way out is absurd. Even the way Aja draws him accents it--this isn't a guy trying to climb his way out of something, it's a guy coming to terms with the realization that he's lived a violent life that's lasted so long that even learning to change is going to be impossible. This is a guy who's slumping his shoulders, because he doesn't know what he's supposed to do, because he doesn't know how to "do"anything. The Kingpin can't work as a story of hope, and there's no reason for a story of Kingpin to start from a place where hope seems possible. He's so bereft of motive and sense when he arrives on the scene that it takes the sarcasm of the soon-to-die woman for us to register how ridiculous he is. "I knew you could not actually be sneering at the ocean."

And yet, that's exactly what he's doing. He's a grown man, and he's scowling at the ocean. That's not what people do. It's what teenage poets and stunted growth 20-somethings do, because it's the type of random, selfish act only attributable to someone who is so consumed with their own confused emotions that they can't believe that other things beyond their feelings carry real weight. The Kingpin isn't a man trying to find his way out. He's a bored psychopath with nothing to occupy his lust for rage, and his brain is trying to figure out what to do with its time now that it isn't figuring out new ways to hire Bullseye to screw up Matt Murdock's life. He's been so comfortable in hate that it's the only thing he can relax in, the same way a newly recovered alcoholic doesn't understand how to deal with waking up without urine in their bed when they're still counting days. Feeling good, feeling depressed--anything is going to seem bizarre when you're somebody whose life has been defined by not feeling at all. So he acts like a child, a lovestruck boy, he teaches foreign languages to children, he bashfully agrees not to strangle idiots, and then, and then, and then.

Then he gets exactly what he wants, which is to come home and find that somebody else wants him to come and play Fight The Super-Hero again. And since David Aja is handling the ninja fight that ensues, it's brilliant to look at, and since it's Brubaker handling the words, the "i'm still a bad-ass" lines are delivered with appropriate levels of testicle-filling pizazz. "Yes....yes. Of course. Come on, then. Let us do this." No screaming, no contractions. He's finally at peace, and he's finally calm. He has people to kill again. He's good at one thing, and somebody woke him up and made it okay to do that one thing again.

That's it, really. It's a return comic, it's a get the band back together issue focusing on one man, and since Bullseye is relegated off to the 7th level of So Many Avengers! books, it's the return of the most compelling character that Daredevil comics has ever had. (Elektra can wear a hat, please.) Will the level of quality brought to bear here stay this high? Will that handshake sequence between Daredevil and Wilson previewed on the final page result in a long Harvey Pekar style conversation about the various ways in which men deal with the death of women who made the mistake of sleeping with them?

Man, I don't know. But the next issue could be half as good as this one, and it would still be ten million times better than fucking Kingdom Come.